Good In Goodbye
by melinagarcia
Summary: It's hard being a teenager and losing your mother. It's even harder when your dad starts dating someone new. It's a roller coaster of emotions and adding a blue eyed boy to the mix adds... even more. Read and review please :)
1. Chapter 1

"Hi, mom."

I looked around and saw that I was pretty much by myself. And it was okay since it was still light out.

Focusing my attention back on my mom, I dropped to my knees and placed the flowers down that I brought for her.

They were her favorite flowers in the whole world... lilies.

And I gave her a big smile. After all, today is a day she would have dreamed of. She would have loved to be apart of it all.

"I did it," I tell her, "I graduated high school and I'm on my way to UCLA. And I could not be happier because I know I'll have the time of my life in college. Sure, I'll miss everyone, but I'm so ready for a new adventure. A new chapter. New people to see. A different school. Everything about it. I just really wish you were here to see me. To see me go off to my dream school, your Alma mater, and watch me chase after my dreams... just like you chased yours."

No, I couldn't cry. Nope. My makeup was done. I had an hour until my graduation party where people were going to be scattered all over my house telling me how proud they are of me and how proud my mom would be of me.

I had to keep it together.

But it's hard.

It's hard when your mom, your mom who was your best friend in the whole world, is not here to see it all. Physically, anyway.

"I miss you every single day of my life and I know you're in a better place and God is taking care of you, but it still hurts. It hurts how you were just taken away from me at a time where a girl needed her mom the most. But I will never forget the times we had. The things you've taught me. The lessons I learned through you. Everything. You're my angel, mom, and I can't wait to see you again one day. I love you so, so much."

A single tear was falling from my right eye.

I couldn't help it. She was supposed to be here watching me graduate. And then watch me get married. And have babies.

But she's not here. She's not here anymore. And I have to live with that every single day.

I miss her so freaking much.


	2. Chapter 2

"Gabriella, where the hell have you been?!" My dad is standing in the doorway looking mad as hell, "your guests are coming in 20 minutes!"

"I'm home, aren't I?" I push past him and set my keys down on the table.

I hear him sighing as he closes the door behind him and I expected him to be mad at me for sure, but I didn't think he'd actually try to lecture me. especially on my graduate day and especially since I'm letting his fucking girlfriend come to my party to celebrate.

He shook his head slightly at me, "are you seriously going to be mad at me today?"

"Gee, dad, what do you think?" I tell him, "yesterday, you sprung the news on me that she's coming to my graduate party, meeting all of our friends and family? Dad, it's my fucking day!"

"I know it is and she's not going to take away from it, I promise you, she's not," he takes a step towards me, "it's just the perfect way for her to meet everyone and she's excited for you, okay? It's a big day and I want her to meet everyone. She's great, Gabs. She really is."

I wasn't going to argue with my dad. Especially not today.

He was throwing me this huge party and has done so much for me that I don't want to be mad at him, but it's hard so I just went upstairs.

"Where have you been?" My best friend in the whole world Sophia is sitting on my bed, flipping through a magazine.

I take off my shoes and head straight to my closet, "visiting my mom. Trying to escape my dad for a bit. And to be honest, Soph, I don't even want this fucking party anymore. I just want to lay in bed and eat sushi or something. Maybe watch some TV."

"You love parties," I could feel Sophia rolling her eyes as I rummaged through some dresses, "besides, it's one of the most important days of your life. You just graduated high school with a fucking 4.5 grade point average. You're off to UCLA. Why wouldn't you want to celebrate that with all your friends and family? I know it's hard, I know it is, but it's something that should be celebrated."

"My dad's girlfriend is coming," I step out of my closet.

Sophia's face immediately dropped. I knew she'd understand and feel sympathetic. "You're kidding me, right?"

I shake my head as I walk over to my dresser and grab my very favorite chapstick. "No, and I'm so pissed, Soph. Yeah, sure, they're been together for, like, four months now, but I've only been around her a handful of times. This is MY day. I want to celebrate with people who I know and love."

"No, yeah, definitely. I totally get it. Didn't you tell your dad that?"

"He doesn't care. It's all about him lately. She's coming. She's bringing her best friend or something like that and then they're going on some trip. I don't know. So at least she won't be here THAT long, but still, it's long enough for me..."

"Do you really hate her that much? She seems really nice."

Okay, I don't hate her at all. I don't hate anybody. But I certainly don't want to get to know her, that's for sure. "She's not my mom and she never will be."

Sophia nods her head in agreement as she sat up a bit, "no, yeah, definitely. No. She will never be. But I mean, you had to know your father was eventually going to date, you know? It's normal."

"Yeah, and I thought it was going to be when me and Jessica were out of the house and he was hitting 50. Not two and a half fucking years after my mom died. Two years, Soph. Don't you think that's too soon? Call me crazy, but I definitely think so."

"I don't know," she shrugs, "some people don't even wait a year..."

Oh my gosh. "Whose side are you even on?"

She gets off my bed and goes over to her purse and digs in there for something, don't know what, "yours, of course! Definitely yours. I just don't think you should hate your dad for trying to be happy again. For putting himself out there and for dating. It's normal. It's what happens."

I don't hate him. I just wish he would grieve more. I wish he could not date for ten years and wait until we're older.

But that didn't happened. He has a girlfriend. Who he met at a Christmas party. Two weeks after the anniversary of my mom's death. Two fucking weeks. And they've been dating ever since. Casual dating for two months. Official for four. And I've met her a handful of times. She's come over for dinner once or twice. She went to one of my sister's volleyball games. And we briefly all met for coffee once. It was all very simple and she does seem nice, but hello, she's not my mom. She wasn't with my dad when he was broke as a joke. No. She's with my dad when he's a millionaire. Red flag, anyone? She's 7 years younger, which is whatever. My dad's only 41 so whatever, not that much older but still. Maybe I'm just trying to find reasons not to like her, I don't know. All I know is that I'm not too fond of this. My dad dating. Him bringing her to MY party. And not only that, but she has a five year old daughter. Like... hi, I don't care for a step sibling. I already have my sister and that's all I fucking need.

"I just thought he loved my mom more, that's all."

"Don't say that," Sophia tells me sternly as she applied some lip gloss, "he adored your mom and you know that. We all know that." Yeah, actually, I do know that. That's why this is so hard. They were soul mates. "This is just life. It happens. But it's not the end of the world, okay?"

And I hardly ever thought about it but when I would, I thought that neither of them would ever remarry or date if anything were to happen.

But I guess I was wrong about that.

* * *

"Can I help you?"

I was walking down the stairs from grabbing something upstairs in my room to this guy standing in my foyer.

He looked up at me and immediately took off his glasses. "Oh, um, I'm looking for my mom..."

I couldn't even really formulate a sentence after that because one he took off his classes, all I saw were his bright blue eyes. And oh my gosh, this guy is so fucking beautiful. Like the most attractive guy I've ever seen in my entire life. Seriously. I'm not even being dramatic about it.

And before I could even answer, my dad comes strolling in, "Troy! You're here. Come on, your mom's in the back with everyone else."

What the fuck is going on? "Dad..."

"Oh, Gabriella. What are you doing in here?" He gives me a weird look, "you should be out with all of your guests."

"Oh, so you're the graduate," this guy tells me. Troy is it? "Congratulations."

I'm so confused by this whole thing. I'm so confused as to why there's such an attractive man in my house. I'm confused by why he knows my dad. Who's his mom? But I thank him anyway because that's the right thing to do, of course. "Thank you."

He gives me a small smile before being yanked away by my dad.

I followed them out and then stop and see where they're headed. My dad takes him over to his girlfriend ad his girlfriends friend she brought along with her and he gives them both hugs and they sit down and my dad's motioning to the drinks and the food and I'm still just confused by who this guy is. And why he's at my graduate party. He's not...no, he's not his girlfriend's son because I know she only had a daughter. I guess the friend's son. I don't know.

I'm just confused as to why he's here. And why he's so fucking attractive because really, it's not even fair.

"What're you doing?" I hear a voice from behind me, his mouth close to my ear.

"Oh, um," I turn around and see Parker Fels standing there with a grin on his face, "nothing. Um just observing the party and everyone..."

It was a stupid answer that he laughed at but he still leaned over and gave me a kiss, which I immediately backed away from. "Parker, no, we're not together. You can't just kiss me in front of everyone."

"Oh, come on, we've been hooking up for weeks. I know it's just for fun, but everyone knows. There's no reason to hide it. I guarantee you everyone has seen us and everyone knows," he tells me, looking right into my eyes, "you look beautiful tonight by the way."

Ahhhh Parker freaking Fels.

He's my go to guy if I just wanna have fun. Go see a movie, have dinner or whatever and then come back to my place to fool around. He's attractive so obviously that's good, but beyond that, it's not much. He's rich so I mean, that's good since all we do is go eat and spend money on food. But no, I can't see myself with a guy like Parker. A guy who knows he can get whatever he wants, whenever. And I know he probably doesn't want me to be his girlfriend cause it'll be really hard for him to be faithful, but I do know he wants me to act like I really like him. And he can't stand that this is as casual to me as it is to him. He wants to be the one to break girl's hearts. But I'm pretty much doing the controlling around here.

I get out of his embrace and turn back to the guy I was staring at. God he was beautiful, "Um, Park, I'll be right back..."

Lie. I wasn't planning on coming back.

Instead, I went over to where this guy was sitting with my dad and my dad's girlfriend and decided to make it known that I definitely think he's hot. Or just something to let him know that I noticed him and that I'm here if he wants to talk to me.

"Gabriella," my dad happily greets me, "what's up? What are you doing?"

"Nothing," I smile at him, "nothing. I was just coming over here to ask how you guys were doing. Do you guys want something to drink?"

My dad definitely knew something was up. I mean, five minutes ago, I wasn't even passing their table. I said a couple words to his girlfriend Monica and then walked away and that was that. But now, I'm here and I know he definitely knows something up. And I'm sure he'll figure it out sooner or later.

And once they said no, he glanced over at Troy and then back at me and bingo, he figured it out.

"Congratulations once again on graduating," Troy's mom told me who looked like a very nice lady, "and UCLA. Wow, great school."

"Yeah, it's my mom's Alma mater, so you know, someone's got to think about her..."

The mention of the word, mom, made everyone quiet. Monica's face kind of dropped, Troy's mom, I forgot her name, kind of just sat there. My dad was trying his hardest to not look uncomfortable. And Troy just sat there, no emotion whatsoever on his face.

And then Troy's mom... Julie! Julie's her name. Now I remember. Julie gave me a smile and picked up her glass of white wine, "well, I'm sure she'd be very proud of you and all that you have accomplished. I know your dad is..."

"Thanks," I tell them before getting up because it got way too awkward, "um, I'm gonna go get a drink. Excuse me..."

Fuck. I should have never said that, but it just came out. The way Monica was way too smiley. My dad looking way too happy. And ugh. I don't even know where I was going with that sentence to be honest. It just came out and I have no idea what else I was going to say. The look on everyone's face stopped me from talking and I think it was for the best.

I immediately went inside, straight to the kitchen, grabbed a shot glass from one of the cabinets and poured myself a shot of tequila.

It tasted gross and I wasn't planning on drinking anything today, but I needed something.

And then when I saw my dad coming inside, I bolted. He was going to try to talk to me and tell me to go apologize or something, but it's not like I offended her or anything. If anything, I offended him. But whatever. I don't want to talk to him right now. Nope.

So, I quickly make my way out of the kitchen, go to the dining room and then sneak out back and walk around to the front.

And once I'm in the front, where I know he won't check, I sit down on the steps and sigh. And think about how this day wasn't supposed to be like this.

My mom was supposed to be here.

She went to UCLA and she had the time of her life there. She grew up in LA so it's not like she had the full on college experience, but in a way she did. She was in a sorority and in all these clubs and she said UCLA changed her life completely. And just hearing the way she would talk about her classes, the things she did, her professors, everything, it made me want to go there.

So at 12 years old, little Gabriella Montez was dead set on going to UCLA once she graduated from high school. Middle school, I got straight A's and that led to straight A's all through high school. By the end of 9th grade, I knew this dream could become a reality.

And so we'd always talk about this day. Graduation day. And how proud she'd be of me if it were to come true and how happy it would make her.

But here I am, graduated and off to UCLA and she's not here to celebrate with me.

I look up at the sky and can't think about anything else in this moment. I can't stop thinking about her. And how beautiful she was and kind and generous and compassionate and loving and funny. God, she was funny. And just the best mom a girl like me could dream of.

So naturally, the tears start flowing once again and I don't even care at this point. I'm not over it. It's been two years and I still miss her every fucking day.

And that's okay. It's okay to miss her. And to cry over it. Over here.

"Oh, I'm sorry..."

I turn around and quickly wipe my tears, "what?"

Troy. He was standing there, his phone in hand, exiting my house and I was just sitting here on these steps like a fucking loser crying my eyes out. I wiped my eyes some more and prayed that I didn't have makeup everywhere but I probably did, so ugh.

"No, sorry, I was going to make a call, but didn't think anyone was out here," he starts to back up a little, "I'll go inside..."

"It's fine," I tell him, getting up, "um, you can make your call. I'm heading in."

And for the first time since I laid eyes on him, our eyes connected. Like really connected. Brown meets blue. And my gosh, they're so, so beautiful, I can't get over it. They're so mesmerizing and so blue and just so beautiful. I have to look away now before I become creepy and end up staring for too long.

So I give him a small smile and then reach for the doorknob.

"Hey," he says to me, which stops me in my tracks, "this is weird because I don't know you... like, at all. But um, I'm sorry about your mom."

"It's okay," I give him another smile, appreciative that a stranger is sad about my mom not being here.

"But like my mom said, I'm sure she'd be very proud of you. UCLA is an amazing school."

It's nice of him to say, but this is the thing... I don't want to talk about UCLA or how proud my mom would have been of me. I didn't want to have this party for that exact reason... everyone telling me how proud my mom would be and how exciting this is, following in her footsteps and blah blah blah. So many people have told me that today and that's everything I want to avoid. I don't want to think about it because it makes me really sad.

I would much rather cuddle up on the couch and watch movies to get my mind off this day. Or go out and get hammered with some friends, I don't know.

But I smile at him anyway, say thanks and then head inside to my guests.


	3. Chapter 3

Beverly Hills, California is home to me. And always will be.

My dad's originally from Seattle, but he moved to LA when he was 18 years old to attend USC for college.

A year later, he met my mom at a party and from then on, they were inseparable.

She was from here so she'd show him around and take him to all these places. And pretty soon, they were head over heels in love with each other that on graduation day, he proposed to her and a short year later, I came along. And then a year later, my sister made our family complete.

It wasn't the plan, but they made it work.

My mom was getting started at a party planning company and my dad was in the process of opening up a restaurant. He had a degree in business and his dream was always to open up an authentic Mexican restaurant and what better place to do it than in the heart of Los Angeles? Beverly Hills.

So he did. With his dad. And today, we have a total of four restaurants. Two Mexican and two American. And everything is great. Financially.

But things could be better... my mom could be here with us. Celebrating this special time in my life with us.

My mom was my best friend. She really and truly was. I know people say that about their mom all the time, but it's actually true when I say it. We were as close as can be and she was my rock. I shared absolutely everything with her. And she was my biggest supporter, my biggest inspiration and just everything.

She was everything to me and my world's a little bit darker now.

I'm just not really the same. It all happened so fast. So unexpected. And I literally have no idea how to handle all of this.

My sister spends her time trying to keep busy and she doesn't talk about it much, but I know she's sad. She thinks about it as she's in a better place now so really, she's the lucky one up there with God. If it's hard on her, she doesn't show it. She really was the one who would get whatever my dad needed those first couple months when he didn't want to do anything. She was superwoman. At 15 fucking years old.

I, on the other hand, know that I'm acting out yet am not doing anything to stop it.

Going out. Spending money. Getting drunk at parties...

That keeps my mind off everything and it's how I'm coping. It literally makes me forget about everything so I don't really care that my dad hates it or that my sister worries. I'm fine. And I'm just trying to move on from everything. Understand why bad things happen to good people sometimes, you know?

My mom was one of those people that you just couldn't hate because she was so nice.

So unbelievably nice.

She was that parent who would pick up any child that needed a ride and drop them off. She was the first one to volunteer for any fundraiser at school. And usually the one to put it together. She was always involved in some way because she wanted to do it for not only her kids, but all the other kids. The kind of mom who would get home from work, tired as hell, but would still make dinner and still bake those cupcakes for a bake sale.

I seriously won in the mom department.

And in the dad, one, too. My parents were the absolute best.

My dad, I love him so much, but it's just... these past couple of months, I just cannot deal with him and I cannot understand how someone who loved my mom so much could just move on so quickly. It hasn't even been two years yet and he's dating someone else.

"Whatcha doing?"

I look up and see my sister standing there with her keys in hand. "Oh, um, nothing, really."

She looks down at the photo albums I have out and all the pictures scattered. "Nothing really? What are you doing with all these pictures?"

"Not sure," I shrug, "I just got an urge to go through them and see all these memories. But now that I think about it, I think I'm going to grab a couple and put them in dad's room to remind him that he once had a wife who he loved more than anything and this Monica lady doesn't even compare to the angel that she was. But I'm not exactly sure yet. Who knows..."

"Gabs," my sister laughs, finding the humor in it. But I think she also knows that I actually would do that. "We'll never know how he truly feels. Maybe this Monica girl is just someone to get his mind off things and it's not serious at all."

"I don't know, Jess, I'm just so offended that he started dating her A YEAR after. ONE year. It boggles my mind."

My sister stayed quiet because she doesn't like talking shit. It's her dad. He's done so much for her and she knows that so she always just keeps things in.

And I actually kind of admire her for it.

But it's so hard for me to sit around and be okay that he's dating someone new. Someone younger. Someone with a KID. I don't know her situation, I don't know much about her because I haven't tried getting to know her, but right now, I just need time.

I'm still dealing. I'm still coping. And I'm still missing.

"Whatever, be the nice one," I tell Jess, "I'm the stubborn one around here."

"I love you," she says with a smile and then leans down and grabs a pic of her and my mom when she was about five years old, "and I'm keeping this."

She told me she'd see me later because she was going to go watch a movie with her boyfriend and then I kind of just sat around for another thirty minutes or so just reliving all these memories. Looking at my mother's beautiful face from years ago. She was so, so beautiful.

And I know it's so common people just saying nice things about someone when they're no longer here, but this isn't an act. This isn't for show.

My mom was the best woman out there.

And she was the best mother us girls could have asked for.

I picked up a picture and it was the four of us and we were in San Diego for the weekend because my mother always insisted we take family trips. At least one every couple of months, whether it be a day trip or a weekend trip. It didn't have to be far or grand. Just a trip to get the four of us connected.

This day, I remember it being one of the best days of my entire life.

I had just turned 14, my sister was 12 and and I thought we were taking this trip because my parents were going to tell us some bad news... like they were splitting up or something because they had been arguing and they would pretend nothing was wrong, but my sister and I knew something was up. Honestly, we were nervous wracks the drive down there and we almost didn't want to go.

But when we got there, while we were at breakfast, I straight up asked my mom if her and my dad were splitting up.

And they looked at each other for a moment, then back at us and laughed in our faces.

They weren't splitting up.

They were renewing their vows and they were doing it that weekend.

Their arguing had nothing to do with them as a couple, just grown up stuff that we didn't have to concern ourselves with and they were stronger than ever. They wanted to renew their vows in the beautiful city that they first said they loved each other and they wanted us to be there.

Most couples renew their vows at 10 years or 20 or a round number, but they didn't care about that.

And so, we spent that whole day happy as can be that our parents were renewing their vows and we had the best time as a family. We went to the zoo, we had the best dinner and just the best time in general.

The next day, they renewed their vows in front of us and it was the most magical day I could have ever imagine.

And this is why it all hurts so bad. I lost my mom and my dad lost his soul mate. Which is why it boggles my mind that he's off with some other girl right now.

Whatever, I couldn't think about this anymore.

I cleaned everything up, put everything away and went to get ready.

There was a party calling my name.


	4. Chapter 4

"Are you going somewhere?" My dad asks me as I'm coming down the stairs, purse in my hand.

"Yeah, my friend's BBQ," I tell him, passing by and grabbing my keys off the tray on the table against the wall in the foyer.

He stood there, looking a bit disappointed by my answer.

I adjusted my purse a bit and then took my phone out of my bag to make sure I didn't have any text messages before I drove. I went to open the door and then felt a little bad that I didn't even ask for permission or anything, so I turn around and ask, "can I go?"

"You can go," he says, "but I was hoping you could come to a birthday party with me."

"A birthday party?"

"Madeline's. Please. It's really important to me."

I could tell it was. I see it in his eyes that he really wants me to go to his girlfriend's daughters birthday and make an effort with her. And I never want to intentionally make my dad mad or sad or anything, but ugh, it's hard. She can never replace my mom. It just feels like she is. It feels like she's coming in here and taking her place and making my dad love her and I never thought it would be possible for him to love another woman other than my mom.

But since it seems important to him, I agree to go. "Maybe for an hour."

"That's fine," he smiles, "that's more than I could ask for. Your sister is meeting us there for a bit as well."

"Okay," is all I say before making my way to the living room to wait for him to go.

And twenty minutes later when he's ready, we make our way out the door and to his girlfriend's house. Actually, it wasn't her house. It was her friend's house or something, I don't know. Madeline's godmother. She was hosting the party for her or something like that. I wasn't really paying attention to what my dad was saying. I only really paid attention to the address.

It was a short 10 minute drive and when we got there, I couldn't believe the house we were at.

GORGEOUS. It was gorgeous.

My dream house, for sure. I mean, I love my house. But it's too European for my liking. My mom loved that, though. I'm more traditional. I want a white picket fence and all that shit. And this house, this house was my dream house. So traditional. Gated community. Big and cozy. Everything I want in a home.

"Girls," my dad turns to my sister and I before we enter the house, "please just be present. That's all I really ask."

"Okay," we both say in unison even though we both know we're going to be on our phones probably the whole entire time we're here.

I walk in and take it all in. It's even more beautiful from the inside. Seriously, it's my dream home and all I really want to know right now is who lives here and who designed it because I want to hire them for my future home.

And then we see Monica and she greets us as usual. Overly enthused and a big smile on her face.

My God, it comes off SO fake. Like she's trying. And I get it could be a nervous thing, but it just screams fake to me.

"Come eat, there's tons of food, I'm so happy you guys could make it," she tells us all as she's leading us to the back, "Maddie is in the jumper, but once she's out, I'd love for you guys to meet her."

"Okay," my sister tells her, smiling, like the nice girl she is. She's definitely a little more accepting of this. But I could tell she's on my side as well.

We walk out to the backyard and it's so big and beautiful and yep, I'm sucked into this house yet again. I want it. I want it soooo bad.

She leads us to a table and tells us to take a seat and she'll bring us all drinks.

And once she walks away, I take a look around at everything and everyone here. There's a cute guy sitting at a couple tables away. There's a jumper that's occupied by kids. There are streamers and balloons everyone and the party is Frozen themed. Cute. Typical. But it is a four year old's birthday, after all.

Monica comes back with the water I requested, but then I realized I wanted a soda so I got up to get one.

And while I was grabbing one and a cup from one of the tables, I felt someone hug at my shirt a bit. Or tap me, I'm not really sure.

I turn around and see the cutest little girl EVER standing there, a small smile on her face, and a birthday crown on. She's seriously the cutest girl I've EVER seen in my life. Light brown hair and these big hazel eyes.

Then it clicks and I realize who this is. This is Maddie. The birthday girl. Monica's daughter.

"Yes?" I ask her, giving her a small smile.

"Can you give me a cup please?" her voice is even cute, "I just jumped for so long and am so thirsty! I need water."

I laughed and turned around and got her a cup, but then realized that there was a jar of iced water there for people to drink and she obviously couldn't reach it. So I turned back around and looked down at this little cutie, "do you want me to pour you some?"

She nods, "please. I don't think I can reach. I can't find my mommy."

"I can give you some, don't worry," I tell her and then turn around and fill this pink cup up with some water and give it to her.

She stands there and chugs it all and then gives it back to me, like she wants me to get rid of it or hold onto it or something, I don't really know. "I'm five years old today! What's your name? I'm Maddie. Do you like Frozen? I love Frozen so much that I asked my mommy if I could have a Frozen party!"

Oh my gosh, this girl was SO cute. I couldn't get over it. "I do like Frozen, actually. Who's your favorite, Anna or Elsa?"

"Hmm," she thinks about it as she giggles and jumps around a bit, "Anna! She's pretty!"

"She is pretty. And she has a good voice."

Madeline giggles and then asks if I could give her some more water so I do.

And then I turn around, watch her drink some more water and then take the cup from her. "My name's Gabriella. I'm a friend of your mommy's. Happy birthday. How do you like being five, is it better than four?"

"So much better!" she's jumping around being all cute, "I get to go to kindergarten which I'm super excited for because I love learning!"

"You do!? That's great, I..." I didn't even finish my sentence because Maddie ran off squealing about something.

I looked at where she was going and she was running into the arms of Troy. Troy. The guy who was at my house the other day. The hot guy. The freaking hot guy was here. And for a moment, I couldn't breathe. I forgot how beautiful and hot he was.

And Madeline was now in his arms and he was smiling at her and laughing as he hugged and kissed her cheeked and gave her a present.

"Oh my gosh, I love it already," she exclaimed before coming back over to where I was standing because I was next to the present table as well.

She placed it on the table, gave Troy another hug and then ran off.

I locked eyes with Troy, but I didn't really say anything because what do I say? Oh hi. What's up? No. We're nothing. We're not friends. I've met him once so this is a bit awkward. Instead, I just grabbed a cup like I originally had planned and turn around to walk back to the table I was at.

But he kind of stopped me. Stood in front of me and smiled. "Hey... Gabriella?"

"Yeah, hey." Uh, I'm surprised he remembered my name.

"Are you..." I think he was trying to find his words, trying to choose them wisely, "did you come with your dad?

"Um, yeah," my God, he's more beautiful today than he was last week at my party. Fuuuck. "Yeah, last minute thing."

He laughed and scratched the back of his neck and looked out to all the people for a moment. And then he looked back at me and gave me a smile, "you're actually in my house, so, uh, welcome..."

What. The. Fuck. This was his house? I WANT IT. I'm sooo jealous. "Oh. Um. Well, thank you. I, uh, I should probably get back to my dad."

I really didn't know what to say to him, what to talk about or anything. It's awkward. It's awkward that I'm here when I don't care for Monica. When I'm not particularly fond of them dating. So like, what the fuck. I just kind of want to get out of here. I want to go to my friends and hang out with all of them.

My sister's sitting with my dad and some lady and I have no idea who she is, but I'm not looking forward to meeting her.

"Gabriella," my dad says as soon as I approach the table.

"Yes?"

"This is Anna, Monica's sister."

Fucccck. It's bad enough I know Monica. I don't want to know her sister, too. But since Anna has not had any impact- negative or positive- on my family whatsoever, I smile at her, a genuine smile as I take a seat at the table. "Nice to meet you."

Anna smiled back. "Nice to meet you as well. Heard you just graduated high school."

"Yep," I say, taking a sip of my sprite, "I'm off to college now."

"Well, congratulations, I'm sure you're so excited. College was the best time of my life," she says and you know what? She seems nice. Genuinely nice. But it's so hard for me to be on board with everything going on. "Do you have any idea what you want to study yet?"

I wanna run my own business, whatever that is. "I'm leaning towards business. Not exactly sure what I want to do in life just yet."

She nods, looking like she understands. "Well, you still have plenty of time."

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Anna ends up talking to us for close to 20 minutes and she's actually cool. I like her. She's 2 years older than Monica and has three kids. A 10 year old, an 8 year old and a 5 year old. And a husband she adores who is currently across the yard talking to some people, but she assures us we'll meet him soon.

But then her 5 year old comes over and needs help with something, so she gets up and tells us she'll be back shortly.

And now it's just the Montez's now, sitting at this table. My sister was on her phone, my dad was scanning the place, probably for his beloved Monica and that's making me sick. And I was just counting down the minutes until I could leave.

"Gabriella, can I introduce you to someone?"

"What?" I look over at Monica who's now standing at our table, "who?"

She looks at my dad and then back at me and pushes some hair back behind her ear, like she's nervous or scared of me. I'm not really sure, but I can be pretty intimidating, I'll give her that. "A friend. She works at UCLA and I just thought she could tell you about it if you're interested."

I'm not. I'm not interested at all.

"Oh, isn't that what orientation's for?" I ask her in the least bitchiest way I possibly could.

"Gabriella," my dad basically scolds, "you should go. I know you have some questions. Weren't you just wondering the other day about some club?"

Yes, but I'm on freaking summer vacation. The last thing I want to do right now is concern myself with school. And I'm leaving in less than 20 minutes. I'm not going to spend it talking to someone who works there. No thank you. I want to stay right here and do absolutely nothing.

I give Monica the most genuine smile I could. "Thank you, but I don't really have anything to ask right now."

"Okay," she says, looking a bit disappointed.

But I shook it off, trying not to let her make me feel bad and turn to my sister.

My dad and Monica took off and it was just the two of us sitting there now. And I really, really just wanted to leave now.

"What are you doing today?"

"I'm going to dinner with Sean and his family and then Kate is having a bonfire out in Malibu," Jess tells me, putting her phone down on the table, "do you wanna go? Lexie and all them are going. Or do you have plans?"

My sister and I were so close in age, and only a school year apart from each other, so we often hung out with the same people. But still, she had her friends and I had mine and it was a nice balance. I loved that we were so close in age and everyone around us got along.

But today, I was just going to hang out with my group of friends and relax. I don't feel like driving all the way to Malibu to get sand all over my car.

"Jordan's having a BBQ which will probably lead to a night of just hang out around the fire."

"Oh okay," she says, "when can we leave this place?"

I laugh. My dad thinks Jessica is way more open to Monica and maybe she is, I don't care to talk about it, but I know she doesn't want to be here at all. And that she probably doesn't want my dad dating anyone. We're sisters. We're on the same page. I know it.

My dad is across the yard talking to some people and since he decided to leave us here, I think it's time we both left as well.

"Let's just go, who cares."

"Gabs, that's rude, isn't it?" It doesn't look like she's down with it. "We can't."

"Well, I am," I get up and she has no other choice than to follow me.

So she does. We walk through these tables, people have no idea who we are and then we slip inside go leave. But when I turn back to make sure she's following me out of this house, she's nowhere be found. So I stop, take a couple steps back and see her talking to my dad and Monica.

Fucccck. Jessica. You fucking screwed me on this one.

Whatever, I'm halfway out. I'm not going to go backwards. I don't care if my dad gets mad at me.

So I make my way to the front and of course, clumsy Gabriella bumps into someone.

"Whoa," he says, holding onto my forearms.

It's Troy. Of course it is. Of course I ran into this gorgeous guy. And of course he's going to ask where I'm going and then I'm going to seem like such a bitch for leaving a party I only arrived to, like 40 minutes ago, but I just couldn't help it. I didn't want to be here. I wanted to be with my friends and I wanted to drink some beers and have fun with them. People I know. And people I like.

He's standing there, just giving me this small smile. And I feel a little uncomfortable. "Um, sorry, I didn't..."

"You leaving?"

"Yes," I say, not caring anymore. I don't care if he knows I don't want to be here. Like, why should I care what he thinks? He's just a friend to Monica or whatever. "I have some things to do."

"Well, I shouldn't keep you then," he says, taking a step to the side, "don't forget your goody bag."

There were goody bags in a cute little basket on the way for you to grab. And I couldn't help, but smile and laugh at that. He was patronizing me, I think. But whatever. He has to know that I wouldn't be Monica's biggest would. Monica even knows. Duh. So I didn't care.

I shook my head and gave him a laugh, "thank you so much.

And with that, I was out.

Time to party for real. With my actual friends.

* * *

"Do you honestly not care that Parker and Valerie were hooking up last night?"

"No," I tell Tori as I'm taking off the shoes I'm trying at Barney's. "I honestly do not care."

It looks like she doesn't believe me which is crazy. Victoria Baker has been one of my best friends since elementary school. She should actually know that this whole thing with Parker is purely physical and just a good distraction every once in a while. There's nothing more to it than that.

She shakes her head and crosses her arms. "I get it. But I don't know, I guess because I could never do this whole no strings attached game that I don't think anyone else can either."

"I can," I get up and put the shoe back on display, "and I know he's doing it to fuck with me which makes it roll off my shoulders even more."

"Exactly! You know he has actual feelings for you so why don't you care? Why haven't you developed any?"

"Seriously, Tor?" I laugh, browsing around for more shoes. "Parker will cheat on me the minute he can. No way. That right there makes me not have any feelings for him. No. I know what being in a relationship with him would be like so honestly, hooking up with him here and there is more than enough"

Victoria shakes her head and looks around for some shoes, too.

I find the cutest booties that I just HAVE to get. "They better have these in my size."

"I seriously just got those two days ago."

"What?" I turn to her, "seriously? why didn't you tell me?!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I supposed to tell you about every purchase I make?" she laughs, picking up a Chanel flat that looks really cute.

I give her a "duh" face and then take my phone out of my bag because it was vibrating. "Yes, because we're the same shoe size." It was just a text message from my sister. "And what if I wasn't with you when I got them? Total waste of money because I can just borrow from you."

She laughed and took off her current flat to try on the Chanel one. "You're right, my queen. So sorry."

There's nothing I love more in this world than shoe shopping. And my friends.

Shoes are the best thing in life.

And friends are a close second. Just kidding. Friends come first.

My three best friends in the whole wide world- Sophia Adams, Victoria Baker, and Christine Wallis have been unbelievable this past year. They were there whenever I needed them. When I wanted to just cry and vent about everything in my life, they were there. When I wanted to go shoe shopping, they were there to go with me. When I wanted to just get in my car and drive until I left California, they were there to STOP me from doing it.

I seriously would not have gotten out of bed if it weren't for these girls. Specifically Tori, who came into my room one day and gave me a long talk and made me get out of bed,put some fresh clothes on and go outside into the world and make me realize that life goes on.

My mom would never want me to be sad all my life, but it's inevitable, it really is.

But she wants me happy.

And that's what my friends are here to do.

"So, how's it going with your dad's girlfriend?" Tori asks me as we're walking to my car after purchasing no shoes, sadly.

"I know you guys care, but it's really the last thing I care to talk about," I tell her, unlocking my car and getting inside before I continue to speak, "I don't really know her, nor do I really care to know her right now. If it gets serious, maybe, sure. But right now, she's just someone my dad has around so he probably doesn't think about my mom all day. At least that's what I'm telling myself because it'd be better than him having her because he actually wants to have her and has forgotten all about my mom and all the wonderful years that they've shared."

Tori buckled up and put her bag on the ground and gave me a frown. "Don't say shit like that, Gabs. I'm completely, one hundred percent behind you and will back you up forever, but you honestly don't know how it is for your dad."

Ughhhhh. Great. Here we go. "No, but I never would have expected him to get a fucking girlfriend a year and a half later, Tor. Way too soon."

"Maybe, yeah, but you and I both know your mom would NEVER ever want him to spend the days by himself."

"He's not by himself, he has us!"

"You know what I mean," she rolls her eyes, "you're not going to live at home forever."

I know. And I get where she's coming from. I have no idea how it was for my dad because my mom isn't his blood. They don't share the same DNA. Maybe it wasn't as hard for him to move on. But I know for a fact, no one is every going to replace her. And no one is ever going to feel like another mom to me.

But it'snot something I care to talk about. "Let's move on, Tor."

"Fine," she laughs, "actually, speaking of Parker a little earlier... my cousin has this super hot friend..."

"No," I already know where this is going.

"Gabriella!" She whines. "Come on. You haven't seriously dated anyone and this guy is hot and cool and he goes to USC, he just finished his freshman year and I hung out with him the other day, we all went for sushi and I just couldn't help, but think about how you two would hit it off."

So what? Who cares if I haven't had a serious boyfriend. I'm 18 years old. I'm young.

And right now, especially since it's summer, I'm not in the mood to start dating and being all serious with someone.

"Let me think about it."

"You really should," she says, buying my lie.

I'm definitely not thinking about it. Unless he is as hot as she says he is, but knowing Tori, she's exaggerating. And also, we have completely different taste. She is not the person I would trust setting me up. No way. But it gets her off my back for the time being.

I crank the volume up to a Adele song and we bust out singing.

And this is what I call a good summer day- shopping with my best friend and listening to Adele on our way to get some food.


	5. Chapter 5

"Dad, you can't just volunteer me without asking me first!"

My dad waves me off as if it's no big deal and fixes his shirt in the mirror, "you said you weren't doing anything."

So?! This is so not fair.

"That doesn't mean I want to watch your girlfriend's kid," I tell him, "Sophia and I were going to binge watch this new series on Netflix and then we were going to go get sushi and meet up with some friends. I hardly call that doing anything, but still, they're plans! This isn't fair, dad!"

"It's just for an hour or so, okay?" he turns to me, "Julia's daughter, Claire, is going to come pick her up in a bit. They were going to watch her but they can't for another two hours so I said you'll watch her for a bit. It's not a big deal."

It's not a big deal? I hardly know this little girl! "Dad, I don't even know her! What am I supposed to do?"

He shrugs as he turns back to look in the mirror, "I don't know, play with her outside. Watch some TV, just talk to her. She's very charming."

"I don't care if she's charming, I don't babysit kids."

"Oh please, you're always with Gracie," he argues, "you'll be fine. Claire's coming to pick her in a bit up and she'll take her back to her house and you'll be free to go get sushi or whatever. This isn't up for discussion, you're doing it."

I know I'm doing it because they're leaving in 10 minutes and that's not nearly enough time to get out of doing this.

My dad's brother's company is hosting a picnic/charity event thing at some park and he wants to take Monica and ugh, it's so frustrating.

Yes, I get it. I get they're dating and he wants to bring her along and shit, but that's what my mom always did. She went to events with him. She got along with anyone and everyone. She was friends with so many people. And they were the cutest couple ever going to all these events together. Work events, weddings, charities, birthday party's... you name it, they were the cutest ones there. And now he's taking Monica. His girlfriend.

I know it was bound to happen, but it just feels so soon to me.

And it makes everything a little more official now that he's taking her to one of these things.

"Oh, they're here," my dad stops fixing his hair as soon as he hears the doorbell. "Be nice. And thank you, sweetheart. I appreciate it, okay?"

"Yeah," I breathe out, throwing my head back.

My dad opens the door and immediately invites them in. He gives Monica a quick kiss and then says hi to little Madeline. She's carrying a coloring book and has a little backpack on. Her hair is in a bun and she's giggling at something my dad is saying, I don't know what because I'm tuning him out, but she looks so dang cute that I loosen up just a bit. She's seriously the cutest little girl I've ever seen. And that little bun on her head is everything.

They walk in further, and my dad closes the door behind them and now we're all just standing here.

"Hi, Gabriella," Monica tells me with a smile, looking a bit nervous.

"Hi," I give her a small smile and then look down at Maddie, "hey, Maddie."

She giggles and then holds out her coloring book, "I brought my Frozen coloring book so we can color. I'm really good."

I couldn't help, but giggle. She's so cute. And she is charming, just like my dad said. And what I remember from her birthday party, well, she's quite the talker. I mean, she even got up on a table and thanked everyone for coming to her party. All on her own. How adorable is that? She's adorable and I'm not that bummed about watching her specifically, just the whole situation, you know? But if I were to watch anyone, I'm glad it's her.

"That's great because I love coloring."

And then our little dog Coco came running out and started jumping on Maddie, which made her excited. Maddie picked up little Coco and hugged her and walked over to the living room with her and immediately sat on the couch, petting and hugging her.

And then it was just the three of us there, which made things a bit awkward. Until Monica spoke up. "Thank you so much for watching her."

Like I had a choice. Ugh. "Yeah, no problem. I watch my little cousin all the time."

"She ate already so she shouldn't be hungry, but she has some snacks in her backpack if she does ask for food. My goddaughter is coming to pick her up around three, Claire, so I left her car seat on your front porch for her," Monica starts telling me, "she's very stubborn about going to the bathroom, she'll hold her pee for the longest so maybe every 20 minutes of so if you remember, just ask if she needs to go to the bathroom. She hardly ever wants to go on her own, but she won't have accidents. She's just super lazy."

"I feel her," I laugh, trying with her. I don't want to be a complete bitch. And I'm sure my dad appreciates it. "We'll be fine."

Monica nods and smiles, "thank you so much. Um, yeah, that's pretty much it, I think."

My dad put his hand on her shoulder and gave me a smile, "okay, well, then we should probably get going. It's about a 20 minute drive and we don't want to be late. Gabs, your sister should be home around five. Call me if you girls need anything. And please take that table in the garage to your grandma later."

Right. Table in the garage for my grandma. Got it. "Yeah, okay."

He gives me a kiss on the head, Monica gives me a small smile, and then Maddie comes back in with Coco.

Monica gives her a hug and a kiss and tells her to behave and Maddie tells her she will and so will Coco and it's the cutest thing, ever.

And then they leave and it's just me and Mads.

Oh boyyyyy.

* * *

"Can I have some water? I am so thirsty!" Maddie tells me once we're inside.

"Sure," I slide the door closed before we walk over to the kitchen, "do you want ice or no ice?"

She thinks about it for a moment, putting her finger on her chin, "hmm ice. Because it makes the water super cold."

Ha. She's the cutest. We were just outside playing with my other dogs. Coco's an inside dog because she's tiny and just sleeps around all day, but our other dogs, a golden retriever, an Australian shepherd and a black lab are all outside most of the day. So she wanted to go out and play with them. And she ran and ran around the yard with them, throwing the ball around, laying on their backs, petting them constantly, kissing all of them.

It was the cutest thing. She's so in love with dogs. And I am, too, so it was really cute to see her being as obsessed with them as I am.

My mom loved dogs. Absolutely loved them.

I got Chloe, my golden retriever, for my 12th birthday because I really, really wanted one. It was the only thing I wanted. And she got it for me. My sister always wanted an Australian shepherd so she got one for her 10th birthday and together, they become inseparable. And then we threw Sasha into the mix.

So we have four dogs, Coco, our little Maltese, Chloe, Sasha, and Dakota. And they are the best dogs, ever.

"I wish I could have four dogs," Maddie sighs as she grabs the water from me, "but mom said we can only have Lily."

"Aww, well, maybe when you're older you can get more."

Her little face lights up, "I'm going to tell my mom that. I just love Coco."

I laugh at her and then go over to the fridge and take out a bowl of strawberries in case she wants some. Actually, I want some. So I set them down on the counter and then plop a few in my mouth as she sits there, gulping down her water.

Taking care of her actually wasn't bad at all. Like, at all. She's the sweetest. She listens. She's funny. And she's down for whatever.

We colored for twenty minutes and then I told her I was going to watch TV, but she could keep coloring, and she didn't even throw a fit. She closed the book and then jumped on the couch and watched TV with me. Of course I had to put on a show she could watch, but I like Spongebob, too, so it worked out.

"Do you want some strawberries?" I asked her, "they're good."

"Okay," she puts her cup down and then grabs one and eats it right away. "I love strawberries."

She's so fucking cute. I can't say that enough.

I grabbed the strawberries, helped her off the stool around the island and we went to the living room to relax and watch some more TV before Claire came to pick her up. She should be here soon because it's a quarter til three and that's the time Monica said Claire will be here.

So we sat down and I put some Disney Channel on for her. Good Luck Charlie.

She watched the TV intently as she rested her head on the pillow and I sat here, legs up on the coffee table catching up on my social media.

Five minutes later, I looked over at Maddie and her eyes were shut. She was sleeping. She fell asleep.

Shit. Claire should be here soon. And Maddie is sleeping. Fuck. I don't want to wake her up. I'm sure she's tired. But she has to wake up. Unless Claire wants to carry her or something. I don't know. All I know is that I shouldn't have let her fall asleep and now I feel bad.

And then the doorbell rang which didn't help at all.

I quickly got up and went to get the door, and instead of seeing Claire standing there, I saw someone else.

Troy Bolton.

What the fuck was he doing here?

"Hey," he tells me as if it's totally normal that he's at my house.

"Hi," I give him a weird look and open the door a little bit more. "Um, what're you doing here?"

In return, he gives me a weird look. And then he lets out a small laugh and take s a step forward. "Um, I'm here to pick up Maddie."

OH RIGHT. Troy. Claire. They're fucking brother and sister. Shit. Why is he here, though? I thought Claire was coming? Shit. Here's this fucking hot guy and here I am, looking like a mess probably. I know my hair's a mess for sure. I was running around with Maddie not too long ago. Ugh. This is just great!

"Oh, um, I thought your sister was," I close the door behind him, "Monica told me..."

"Yeah, but she got held up, so here I am..."

Right. Here is he. In my house. For the third time now.

Which is weird. Because we hardly have a connection. I mean, Monica, but still, she's hardly in my life and well... actually, maybe she is in my life now, right? I don't really know. It's a complicated situation for me. And I don't really care to think about it at the moment. Ahhh.

Anyway... Maddie. Maddie's sleeping. Fuck. "Um, she's actually asleep."

"She is?" he looks a bit surprised, "she hardly ever naps."

"Oh, is she not supposed to?" Fuck. I'm a bad babysitter. "I can wake her up if you want..."

Troy shakes his head, "no, no, it's fine. Monica would love it that she's asleep. She always wants her to take a nap, but Maddie never wants to. She always wants to be awake, playing and talking to people. Ha. How'd you do it? How'd you get her to fall asleep?"

I have no idea. I don't think I really did anything. "Not sure, maybe because she was playing with my dogs for, like, thirty minutes straight?"

He laughed, "that could be it. How long ago did she fall asleep?"

"Not long, maybe like ten minutes."

"Oh okay." He stands there, looking like he's trying to figure something out. Like what to do about it. I probably wouldn't want to wake her up either so this is kind of a dilemma. Man, I shouldn't have let her fall asleep. "Um, mind if I let her crash for twenty more minutes or do you have somewhere to go?"

I do have somewhere to go. There's no specific time I'm getting sushi, but I'm definitely getting it. "No, I don't, that's fine."

What? Did I seriously just say that? Am I letting them stay in my house longer than they were supposed to?

What is happening here? Why am I letting this happen?

Maybe because Troy is insanely attractive and the few times I've seen him, all I've wanted to do is sit and stare at him and now's the perfect opportunity to do that. He's asking me to stay basically. And if I say no, I'm pretty much an idiot, right?

"It was nice of you to watch her," Troy tells me as we make our way back to the kitchen, "I'm sure you had other things you would have rather done."

"She's a cool kid," I shrug, opening the fridge and grabbing him a water.

I leave out the part that I was basically forced to watch her because I don't want him to think I'm this brat, you know? But I didn't want to watch her. Just because it would feel too real. It would feel like this is the new norm. Monica and my dad dating, being a couple, and her leaving her kid with us. It was for selfish reasons, but it wasn't bad at all. She's a cool kid. She's nice and has manners and is SO funny.

Troy laughs as he takes a seat on one of the stools and grabs the water from me, "thanks. Yeah, she's cool. And so funny."

"You guys close?"

"Yeah, yeah, Monica and my mom are best friends."

I knew they were, but I don't know. I kind of want to figure out this dynamic. Troy came to my graduation to pick them up and now he's here picking Maddie up and taking her to his house. They're not family. Doesn't Monica have some family that she wishes to leave her kid with instead?

But then I remembered that I hardly know anything about Monica. Like, barely anything.

I'm not sure if I'm supposed to, but I think I am since she is dating my dad and I'm sure she's going to be around.

Like, I know her and her husband divorced when Maddie was a year old. And they're still on friendly terms. They have 50/50 custody and it was all very amicable. I know that her and my dad met through a mutual friend. I know that she just turned 34 not too long ago so she's basically 7 years younger than my dad. I know that she's originally from Northern California. And that she's a personal stylist. That's about it, though, if I'm being honest.

My sister probably knows more, but I've never cared to ask about it.

"Oh, so you guys like help each other out and stuff," I go back to the fridge and take out a bowl of grapes, "you want some?"

"Sure," he reaches for some and grapes a handful, "yeah, we do. She doesn't have a lot of family here, we're basically her family. They're all up north. But we don't mind. We're always helping each other out."

"Friends that are like family," I comment, "that's, like, the best thing right there."

He nods, grabbing a couple more grapes, "for sure. She's like another aunt to me so Maddie's like a sister or cousin."

That's nice. I can tell Maddie and him love each other, just from their small interactions at her birthday party that one time. "Wait, your mom isn't 34 is she? Because you're, like... how would that even be possible?"

"No," Troy laughs, shaking his head, "no, no. My mom had me young, but not that young. She's 41. Monica and my mom met through her ex husband who is my dad's cousin. They were together for 11 years or so, so yeah, I've known her for a while now."

"Is that... awkward? Since they're divorced now?"

"Nah," he shakes his head, "no, they're friends. We're not all constantly getting together for BBQs, but they're very much friends so it's fine."

Friends. Right. That's... I don't know, a little worrisome. I wouldn't want my boyfriend being friends with his ex that he was with for a long time. And I know it's different since they have a child together so they need to talk, but I don't know. What if feelings come back? What if Monica realizes she still loves him while hanging with him one day and then my dad gets his heart broken? Then what? Oh, I'll be so mad. I'll be livid, for sure. I know that. No one messes with my family. Especially my dad. Who has already been through so much. Wait... do I want them to be together? What am I even saying? Ahhh, this is weird.

But I guess that's good for Maddie, you know? The most important thing in their life.

I know that if my parents ever divorced, they would set aside their differences and be there for my sister and I. So I applaud them for that. For sure.

"That's cool," I say, easily, like I haven't put much thought into it or anything. Even though for the past minute or so I have. "Um, she didn't really eat, just had half a granola bar and a couple of strawberries a bit ago."

"Oh, that's fine," he tells me, "we're probably gonna take her to dinner or something, so it's better that way."

Oh okay. Well, that's good.

Why did I all of a sudden wish I was invited to that dinner? WEIRD. Oh my gosh.

I mean, I don't think I really would want to go. But for a split second, I imagined how cool that'd be. Getting to sit across from Troy and his insanely hot face and Maddie, who is so charming. And the cutest thing, ever. I don't know. It just seems like a fun time, for some reason.

But no. I shake that thought off and remember that whatever this is, is not permanent.

Who knows what's going to happen with my dad and Monica.

The thing I do know, though, is that Troy is the hottest guy I have ever seen and maybe that's the one good thing to come out of my dad dating Monica.

That I get to stare at this face sometimes.


	6. Chapter 6

"Do you miss living up north?"

My grandma chews the chips in her mouth before giving me an answer. "Oh, of course. But I love LA."

I don't think I've ever asked her this, which is weird. It's been so long. They moved down here because my dad and his dad opened up a restaurant together and well, they couldn't be away obviously, so here came my grandma. And they've been living down here for, like, the past 17 years.

"Yeah, I love LA, too," is all I really say.

And then I sit there and look around the place. My dad's restaurant.

I haven't been here in a month. At this one, anyway. I've been to his others, but I recently discovered another Mexican restaurant that I love so I've kinda been going there. But shh, don't tell my dad, he probably wouldn't like it very much. Ha.

"What's wrong, mija?" My grandma asks, knowing something's up. I'm quiet. And I'm usually never this quiet.

"I don't know," I shrug, not really caring if she knows, but I don't really know how to start it off. "Just having a weird day."

"Friend problems? Boys?"

Nope. Dad problems. Like usual, lately. "Do you like Monica?"

My grandma laughed. And then sat back and just stared at me for a minute as she crossed her arms. I've never talked to her about Monica. Briefly, but it was her trying to talk to me about it and I shut her down because it was when they were barely starting to date and he didn't bring her around at all. But now, she's everywhere and doing everything with him and it's just the most frustrating thing on the planet.

"Your dad's told me everything," she says, "Jess isn't giving him as hard of a time, but you on the other hand... I know it's hard for you."

"And he just thinks I should be okay with it!" I exclaim, a little too loudly, "it's fucking weird, grandma. Like, why on earth would I be okay with him dating someone new? And someone so soon after?

"You know, I think he's just trying to ignore that because he'll feel terrible about it," she says and I get it, it's her son.

But still. My feelings are hurt. I'm sure my mom's feelings are hurt. "I hate it."

She gave me a small smile and leaned forward. "I've only met Monica a handful of times. She was lovely. And her daughter was precious. But I get where you're coming from, sweetheart. She's not your mom and she never will be and I know your dad knows that. Trust me, he really does. He knows that."

I feel like I've been talking about this issue NONSTOP lately, but she's everywhere lately with him and ugh, it's getting too real for my liking.

"You don't think it's too soon?"

"That's not for me to comment on," she says, like a good mother, "I'm here for you, though."

I loved my grandma so much. My dad's mom, my mom's mom. Both of my grandma's were the best. And I know I can talk to them about anything and everything. I can vent to them. I can tell them exactly what I'm feeling.

And what I'm feeling right now is that I wish my dad was there for me and Jess more. "I feel like she's come in and taken him from us."

"You really feel that way?" she doesn't look TOO surprised. "Have you told him?"

"No, because the less I talk to him right now, the better."

"Gabriella, don't have that mentality," she says, "you and I both know your father is a great guy and he is just trying to figure out what's next in life. Your mom would never want him to be alone. She would always tell me that if anything were to happen to her, that she hopes your dad will find someone great to look after you girls and someone great for him to enjoy life with."

Yep. That was my mom. As great as can be.

But I don't think she meant a year after she died. Like, I really, really doubt she'd be happy he moved on so fast.

"She was probably talking about when we were younger and we needed a mother figure in our life," I roll my eyes, "not now. I mean, my dad works, he comes home, has dinner with us sometimes and then is off to hang with Monica. OR he grabs dinner with her instead. We just hardly see him anymore and sure, it's summer, we're not really at home either, but he's our dad! He should be home!"

"I understand completely, mija, ad I am very sympathetic to you. Do I think he's moving on a little fast? Sure. But maybe it's just something he's going through. Maybe he thinks this will heal him. You never says Monica will be in his life permanently?"

Yeah, my grandma's right. Everyone who's telling me that is right.

Heck, I even though about that. I'm chalking it up to the fact that he's just trying not to think about my mom all day, everyday.

But lately, I just feel like it's more. Like, he is actually serious about this girl and it's not just some casual girlfriend and he'll take a break after her and won't date for years. Because they've spent so much time together. He's on the phone with her constantly. And it's all just way too much to be casual.

"Thanks, grandma," I smile at her.

"I'm always here for you and Jess," she says, reaching to grab my hand, "you know that."

I do know that. And I'm very, very thankful for her.

* * *

"So what, you're not going to the Bahamas with Sophia and them anymore?"

"Guess not," I tell Parker as I sit up on his bed and fix my hair a bit.

He grabs my back for a moment and moves his hand over to my shoulder and then turns me around and plants a kiss on me.

But I have to get going and I don't want to be here anymore. I just had to get out of the house because Monica was coming over and her and my dad were going to cook or something, I don't fucking know. I just knew she was going to be there so I had to bolt.

And my friends who were seeing this movie I didn't want to be seeing are probably home now so I can go there.

"I have to go."

"Come on, stay," he says, "what's the rush?"

"Tori and them are expecting me," I tell him, putting my shoes on, "and I'm sure you have some crazy party to go to."

He laughed and put his lips on the back of my neck after moving my hair out of the way. "I wouldn't mind skipping it if it meant you were staying. Come on, just stay. We can watch a movie. We can... not watch a movie."

And now I laughed. Hanging with Parker was fun. He was the best kisser ever and he was funny. And he got my mind off things so why not?

But I was not going to have sex with Parker Fels. No.

It was just for fun, making out, fooling around, making out some more. God, he was a good kisser.

"Come over tomorrow," I turn around and latch my lips onto his and make out with him for a moment. "Dad's going out."

"I'm there," he kisses me once more.

And then I get off his bed and go grab my purse that's hanging off his computer chair.

I have no feelings for Parker. I'm not sure if he knows, we don't really talk about it, but there's no feelings there and I would never be exclusive. He's not this one woman guy and I know I'm not the only girl he has in his bedroom and that's definitely okay with me. And I think that's what makes him so attracted to me. He knows he can always just come to me because I'm not mad at him for hooking up with other girls- I'll still hook up with him.

It's just a situation that works for me right now.

I'm a girl and I have needs and the want to make out and cuddle with a hot guy. But I don't want everything that comes with it right now- the commitment, the emotional shit. So this is perfect for me and it's perfect for him.

"Okay, I gotta go."

"I'll miss you," he gets up and comes over to me with a smile on his face.

"Stop," I laugh, trying to walk away.

But he pulls me back in, his naked body is against mine and have I mentioned he's a good kisser? God, he really is.

And I have to back away now before he pulls me back in and somehow entices me to have sex with him.

Because that is something I'll for sure way. My first time has to be someone I truly and really care for and who cares for me just as much, if not more. I'm still a girl and a hopeless romantic. Just not for the time being, of course.

So I pull away, give him one last kiss and then leave.


	7. Chapter 7

My friend Jordan is having a BBQ today and I'd much rather be at that one than this one.

And by this one, I mean, Monica's.

Technically, I don't know if it's hers. It's at the Bolton's house, but I'm pretty sure she put this together. She wanted her ex husband to meet my dad, my dad wanted us to get more acquainted with Monica and Maddie and their life or whatever. I don't really know, to be honest.

All I know is that I definitely do not want to be here at the moment.

"Don't you think it's weird that she put together a BBQ for you to meet her ex? Like he's so worthy."

"Gabriella!" My dad yells at me, but in a whisper because I whispered first. No one was really around us. They were out back while we were in the kitchen putting what we brought down. "Don't be rude. They're friends and he's Maddie's dad. This is important. Him knowing the other guy in Maddie's life."

That brought a pain to my stomach. Like, he's being her second dad or something.

When it's hardly the truth. Sure, my dad, Maddie and Monica have hung out numerous times. Okay, a lot of times. But still. He's my dad, Maddie has a dad.

"So it's that serious?"

"I don't want to talk about this right now."

Of course he doesn't. He never wants to talk about how serious they are, if he loves her, blah blah blah.

Actually, I think he only doesn't want to talk about it with me because my aunt the other day told me how happy she is for my dad, that he's so invested and happy with someone after everything's that's happened. So made me think he told his sister all about his feelings for Monica.

Whatever. I dropped it. And we went outside and joined my sister, Monica, the Boltons, minus Troy, and Maddie.

We all take a seat around the table while Monica and Julia Bolton go inside to get some drinks.

And when they return, Troy is trailing behind.

What? I thought he wasn't here. Obviously, I wasn't going to ask because that's weird and they'll probably think about why I care. But I kind of did care. Well, I assumed he was out with friends doing what a typical teenager does during summer, but guess not. I don't know. It's kind of nice that he's here.

You know, for good eye candy. Just so I can stare at him.

"Look who decided to join us," Monica laughed, motioning to Troy, "put it right there."

Troy put the pitcher of lemonade down in front of me and then gave me a small smile, which for some reason gave me multiple butterflies.

He said hi to my dad and my sister and then went around and gave Maddie a kiss on the head. Maybe he was just upstairs or something. I don't know.

But he's here now. And all of a sudden, I'm a little nervous. The last time I saw him was at my house when I babysat Maddie and that was two weekends ago. And it's fucking weird, but I think about him. Not in a pining way or like, I want him so bad way, but he's so hot, it's kind of hard not to. And also, I don't know, there's just something about him that it makes it hard not to... you know, crush on him. Which is bad. And it's not like a real, real crush. It's sort of like one of those, longing crushes where you know nothing's going to happen, and they're just so hot not to crush on, you know?

I mean, Maddie slept for like an hour so we talked for that long. And it was... nice.

"Sorry, I gotta take this," I tell everyone as my phone's ringing.

My dad looks at me like, yeah, right. But I do have to take it. It's Tori. What is something's wrong?

I'm a loyal BFF, I always answer phone calls.

So I excuse myself, go inside and wander off to their front living room where I can sit down and talk to whatever Tori wanted.

It actually wasn't anything important, she was just at the mall waiting on her mom trying on infinite amounts of clothes and she wanted to talk and I didn't mind at all. I could use an excuse to not be outside right now and engage in small talk. I'll just say it was a friend emergency. And leave it at that.

So I sat here for close to ten minutes just talking to Tori about anything and everything.

"Are you going to be okay?" I ask her.

"What?" she says through the phone, confused as hell probably.

But Troy's now standing in the living room and I have to make it seem like I'm helping my friend through a crisis. "Yeah, well, I'll come over later, okay?"

And then Tori's repeatedly saying my name, trying to figure out what's going on, but I hang up on her. Then I quickly text her and tell her I'll explain things later and then lock my phone and look over at Troy who's sitting on the couch next to me now, for some reason.

"Sorry," he says, grabbing the control, "just came in here to watch the game."

"Oh," is all I say.

I sit there for longer than I need to, I think, but for some reason, I just don't really wanna go outside.

And if he's allowed to be in here, why can't I?

"What are we waiting for?" I ask Troy, but it looks like he has no idea what I'm talking, so I elaborate. "To eat..."

"Oh," he says, sitting up a bit and moving a pillow so he could get a little more comfortable, I think. "Yeah, I think we're just waiting for Bill to get here, he had a prior commitment so he'll be here as son as he can."

I don't say much else because I don't know what to say. It's a fucking weird situation.

WHY should my sister and I meet him?

Like, I understand my dad meeting him. And as much as I dislike it, I understand it. But my sister and I? It doesn't make sense. They're not getting married, they're not moving in together or anything so I just don't get it and it's annoying and weird and will probably be really awkward.

"So what other plans do you have today that you'd rather be doing?"

"What?" I turn to him and then let out a small laugh because he has a small smile on his face. "A BBQ."

"Wow, you're a popular girl."

I mean, I have a lot of friends. Acquaintances. But yeah, I suppose. It's nice always having someone there you could call up if you're bored. Or that group of friends to hang out with on the weekends. "Oh, so popular."

He gives me a small laugh and then grabs the control again and switches through the channels.

"Wait, stop!"

"What?" he asks me.

And I'm all of a sudden embarrassed. Fuck. That didn't mean to come out. "Oh. Um, no nothing, sorry, never mind."

He didn't let it go, though. "What? You wanna watch this?"

Uhhhhh, kind of. Whenever I see Seinfeld on TV, I just have an urge to watch it, but it just came out. This is his home, he came inside to watch baseball and that's what he should watch. Pretty sure I thought my sister or best friends were channel surfing for a minute or something.

"No, I just, sorry," I laugh, trying not to be too embarrassed, "this is your house."

"We can watch it if you want."

"No," I shake my head, "nah, you came inside to watch the game."

He changed the channel to the game and it wasn't even on yet. "It's not on yet, we can watch Seinfeld."

Well, okay, if he says so. HA. How fucking embarrassing that I basically exclaimed for him to stop on the channel. I don't know what was going through my mind. Probably that I was at home or something. It just came to my head to yell that.

And now here we are, watching Seinfeld.

It was one of my favorite episodes of all time, too.

"Is this your favorite show?" Troy asks me after a couple minutes of silence between the two of us.

"Yeah, it's one of those shows that you always just need to watch if it's on, you know?" I tell him to justify my reaction when I saw it on TV.

He nodded, like he understood. "Oh, for sure. It's a good show."

And then for the next five minutes, we sat here just watching it until there was a commercial. and that's when I picked up my phone and checked my text messages. I had a couple from Tori, I had one from Sophia who I was texting earlier and a new one from Parker.

**Tonight? **

No idea what he means, but I'm not in the mood for him tonight.

And then I reply to Tori's texts and Sophia's before setting my phone down next to me.

"I saw you yesterday."

"What?" I turn to Troy, a small smile on his face, "where?"

"Santa Monica," he says, muting the TV for a second, "you were with two girls. 3rd street. You were waiting outside pinkberry."

I was in Santa Monica yesterday with Tori and Sophia and I was waiting for them outside of pinkberry. But you know what else was happening? Me looking like complete shit because we had just gone to Soul Cycle and we were in work out clothes and no makeup.

Fuuuuuuck. Troy is the hottest guy I've ever seen and there's nothing, but still, I would never want him to see me like that. Ugh. Whatever.

"Oh, there was a reason for that look," I say, "we had just finished soul cycle..."

"What look?" he laughs.

"I don't know, the hot mess look?"

He shook his head, "nah, I didn't think any of you guys looked like hot messes. I was debating whether or not to say hi, but before I could even make a decision, you guys walked the other way. Was actually there with a friend who says he knows you guys."

Thank God he didn't say hi close up. He would have thought differently. "Who?"

"Brandon Smith," he says, "you know him?"

"I do," I say, leaning back a bit and turning to face him so we could talk to each other easier, "we went to high school together, he's cool."

"Yeah? Even though he fucked your friend over?" he asks with a laugh.

Ha oh my gosh. He did fuck my friend over. But she's not, like, my best friend or anything. I wouldn't chop his balls off for her. She's just one of those friends that you have, but you probably won't have for years to come, you know? But he did fuck her over and it wasn't cool.

He was in my math class, though, so I know him personally and I know he's a cool guy. He constantly made me laugh and he's nice. You know, just maybe not the best at keeping girls.

But why would I ride him off because of that? He didn't do anything to me personally. And what he did wasn't unforgivable. So many guys play girls.

"I mean, she's not like my best friend or anything so I don't need to cut him out of my life or be mean to him."

"Oh, well that's nice of you," he says, I think a bit sarcastically.

I don't say much else, just give him a smile. And then I look around the living room, waiting for this show to come back on or for Monica's ex to get here so we can eat and I can leave. As I'm looking around, I land on a photo of them as a family.

And I know that background because I've been here.

Seattle, Washington.

I don't know why, but I immediately get up and walk over to to the picture frame and pick it up. It's probably rude, but it just happened.

"Seattle," I hear Troy say from behind.

"Yeah," is all I whisper out, turning to him with a smile, "yeah. Sorry. I just, my mom and I have the exact same picture."

I brought the frame over to the couch because it looked like he didn't mind that I grabbed it in the first place and just looked at the picture. His sister was standing exactly where I was standing and his dad was where my mom was. There was four of them, but it was just my mom and I in our picture. It's actually my favorite picture my mom and I have together and it's in my room.

It was just so crazy to my that they have the exact same picture basically because what we were standing in front of isn't a landmark, it isn't somewhere in Seattle you have to check out. It was just a random spot we wanted to take a picture in before our hair got messed up due to the wind.

And here are the Bolton's, with the exact same picture.

"You can't even tell it's Seattle," Troy laughs, "we were walking back from our day and my mom realized we had no pictures as a family to commemorate the day or whatever, so we just stood in front of a random statue and it ended up being frame worthy."

"Yeah," I say as I stare at it, "yeah, my mom and I... we were starting our day, but it was windy so we wanted a picture before our hair was messed up."

I realized string at this picture a little too long could be creepy, so I put it back.

And then I sat on the couch next to him again.

"Did you guys have fun?" he asks me, "I loved it. I wish I could go back. That was only a year ago, actually."

"Yeah, you guys all look about the same," I tell him. And he looked fucking hot. He's more attractive now, though. His hair's a bit shorter, which I like better, to be honest. But that's beside the point right now. What did he ask me? Oh right, if we had fun. "It was only my mom and I and we had the best time."

"Your dad or sister didn't go?"

I shook my head as I turned to him a bit, "nah, my mom had this thing where she'd take daughter trips. And so it was just her and I."

He looked intrigued, like he never heard of it. "Daughter trips?"

"Yeah," I decide to elaborate, "yeah, when I was, like, five, we started doing daughter trips. It could be once a year, or every couple years. Nowhere too far or anything. We went to New York and Hawaii, those were the bigger trips. She'd do it with my sister, too. You know, just a one on one trip."

"So she'd do a trip with you and then one with your sister?" he asks. "Hmm."

"What?"

He shakes his head, "no, nothing. I mean, my mom and sister would take daughter trips, very sparingly, but they'd happen. And I'd go with my dad and we'd have a guys trip. But I know that if I were a girl, she'd take me too. Not do separate trips."

Yeah, people always thought that was weird. They didn't understand it. Why spend more money when you don't have to?

"That was just my mom," I shrug, not really know what else to say, "she was big on having separate relationships with my sister and I. Loved us just the same, but wanted each one to be unique."

"That's... nice," he smiles at me, "that's actually really cool."

It genuinely looked like he thought it was cool that my mom did that and that made me happy. It also made me miss her, but when am I not missing her?

And we kind of just sat there and held gaze for longer than we probably should of. But it's hard to look away from him because he's so hot. He's so fucking beautiful and hands down the most attractive man I've ever been around.

"So what'd you guys do in Seattle?" he asks, making conversation and making me look away for a second.

"Oh, we loved it so much," I start off...

And then we talk about everything Seattle and more things.

For the next 30 minutes...

It definitely did not help this stupid crush at all.

* * *

"Bill said he's stuck in traffic and to start eating without him," Monica says after checking her texts.

They adults all kind of just look at each other and then agree to eat.

Which was good because I'm starving.

Monica and Julia went inside and brought out all the side dishes while Troy's dad grabbed the hamburger patties that were ready from the grill. And we just sat around and waited for everything to be served because I really didn't want to get up again. My sister offered to help, though. Ha.

They came back out with the dishes and took their seats again, and it looked like everything was about ready to eat.

"So, let's eat," Julia claps her hands together.

I look at everyone around me grab food from each plate and put it on theirs. And I wait until they're all done to grab mine.

And less than give minute later, everyone is engaging in conversation.

"So, Gabriella," Julia calls my name, "are you doing anything exciting this summer?"

Am I doing anything exciting? Ha. I was supposed to go to the Bahamas for a week with my best friends, but my dad isn't letting me anymore because he planned a trip to Hawaii with Monica and Maddie. Isn't that fucking crazy?! Why would I want to spend time with them instead of my friends? And I know I'm 18, but I still live with him so he makes the rules. I'm not that rebellious, unfortunately, or else I'd be going on that Bahamas trip.

I looked over at my dad and you could tell her felt nervous. And I didn't want to be a bitch about it, so I just shrugged.

"Um, well, Hawaii in about a month. Nothing major. Just hanging out with friends and stuff."

"Oh, well, Hawaii's beautiful," Julia looks like she has no idea my dad tore me away from that trip to go with them. Or maybe she does since Monica is her best friend and she's responsible for this and she's just pretending she doesn't know anything. "You guys will have so much fun. Right, Maddie?"

Maddie giggled as she stuffed some broccoli in her mouth and didn't say much else.

And then Julia turned to my sister, "Jessica, you're going to be a senior this year. Are you excited to almost be graduating?"

"I am," Jessica smiles at her, obviously the more friendly one out of the two of us, "I still don't really know if I want to stay local like Gabriella or go away for school, so that's something I'm starting to think about. But I am excited."

They engage in conversation as I sit here and eat this delicious potato salad. I think Julia made it, I don't know, but it's so fucking good.

And then I hear Monica speak, and my attention is back.

"Yeah, the other day we went to this Italian restaurant, it was my first time there, but Troy, you'll love the lasagna," she says with a laugh, "right, Joe? Wasn't the lasagna so good? We should take all of them there to try. You said your girls love Italian. And..."

"What restaurant is it?" I immediately interrupt, especially after seeing the look on my dad's face... a little bit of horror.

Monica thought for a second. "Oh, um, man, what was it called? La Gondola, I believe..."

Oh wow. I cannot believe my dad right now.

I wanted to scream, I wanted to cry, I wanted to get up and walk away.

My father, the guy who was once married to my mother, who I thought he loved more than anything, took this lady he hasn't even known for a year to their favorite restaurant ever. My mom's FAVORITE. The place where they had their first official date. He took her there, and now she's sitting here talking about us going there. Like we haven't been there. So obviously, my dad hasn't said anything. He didn't tell her he goes there. He didn't tell her that we went there this year on her birthday to celebrate her. None of that. He just took her there and made her believe whatever it was that she believes about it.

God, I am SO mad. I'm pissed. I'm hurt. And I just want to scream at my dad at the top of my lungs right now.

I looked over to my sister and she had a blank look on her face. I know she's probably disappointed as well, but she won't say anything. And she definitely won't make this into a bigger deal than it is... like I would.

For some reason, I just sat there. I didn't say anything, like my dad was probably expecting me to. I just sat there and stared at Monica.

"We should all go," she repeats, giving me a smile. "We also talked about maybe going up north, maybe before we go to Hawaii. I know you wanted to do some traveling this summer Gabriella, so..."

NO. I can't. Is she being mean on purpose? Is she shoving this in my face on... purpose?!

Lately, she's been getting way too comfrotable. More open. She's not shy anymore. And I'm just so... fucking sick of it.

She actually had the audacity to sit in the room with my dad and tell me that I can't go to the Bahamas anymore because of this Hawaii trip. And she sat there, like she was happy she was taking it away from me or something.

I just couldn't take it anymore.

So I get up, put my napkin on my plate and give it to her. "I've been to La Gondola, because it's my mom's favorite restaurant. You're not the first girl he's taken there and you probably won't be the last. And why even bother going up North? My dad's family loved my mom so much so you'd be wasting your time trying to win them over. And don't give me that bullshit, you knew I was going to the Bahamas, but you moved the Hawaii trip so my dad is making me go there instead. Stop acting like you're apart of this family because you're not. You definitely aren't and I don't ever want you to be."

And with that, I got up and walked away. I grabbed my purse from the chair in the dining room and bolted out of there. I knew my dad was going to come after me sooner or later, so I just sat down in front on their porch steps and waited for Sophia to come.

I was going to forget all about this day by going to Jordan's BBQ and getting drunk. Probably hook up with Parker or something.

When the door behind me opened, I rolled my eyes, told Sophia to hurry up and got ready to apologize to my dad and hear him yell at me.

But it wasn't my dad.

"I'm not in the mood," I tell Troy, turning back around and looking down at my phone.

"Is that why you're waiting for someone to pick you up?"

"Well, I'd rather be with my friends, I'm not going back in there."

In the grand scheme of things, yeah, for sure I was rude to her and maybe I shouldn't have said what I said, but right now, in my heart, I feel like it's okay that I said that. Someone needed to, you know? So I'm not going to go back in there and apologize. I'm not going to tell my dad that I didn't mean it. Because I think I do mean it. I hate how she thinks that, that Italian restaurant is probably their place now. Or that my family up North is going to love her and she's so excited for it. Or that she's pretending like she didn't totally ruin my Bahamas trip because she wanted to switch the days of Hawaii. She knew exactly what she was doing. I know she did. It felt slimy and evil and I have NO idea why she wouldn't want me to go to the Bahamas.

Troy took a seat next to me and I'm not really sure why. "You know, I think Monica's pretty hurt."

"Oh please," I roll my eyes and look at the text Sophia sent me. She'll be here in three minutes. "She's hurt? Okay."

"You did say some pretty fucked up things."

I turned to him, annoyed that he was taking her side, even though I'm not surprised at all. I mean, she's pretty much his aunt. AND anyone would take her side since she literally didn't say anything mean to me. But they don't know how it is for me. Some new chick coming in and grabbing the heart of your dad when you thought your mom and dad were going to be together forever.

I shook my head, not really caring. "I don't care."

"Pretty sure you should apologize," he tells me, "Monica is one of the nicest people I know and she means no harm by anything."

"Are you kidding me?" That's when I kind of lost it. "Monica, your precious Monica comes into our lives and acts like it's okay to act like my dad has never been married. Do you know how fucking hard it is for me? To not only lose my mom, but watch my dad go out with some girl, when my whole life I only ever saw him with my mom? I thought they were going to be together forever. Seriously forever, so don't fucking tell me I should apologize for how I feel. There's a new girl taking my mom's place and seeing them together is almost as hard as losing my mom. My dad spends all his time with her, is almost acting like my mom never existed. And nobody, NOBODY knows what I go through every single day of my life. Not you, not my dad, certainly not Monica. My dad is in there, probably comforting her instead of seeing if I'm okay, if his daughter is okay. So you know what, I think I feel justified. Fuck you And fuck all of this!"

And with that, I wiped the tear rolling down my face and got up and went to meet Sophia down the block or something.

I couldn't sit there anymore. I hated everything about this day and I just needed to get out of there.

The worst thing about all of this?

My dad didn't even come out to see if I was okay.


	8. Chapter 8

"We need to talk."

Ugh, I knew this was coming, but I was on my way to the beach right now.

I closed the fridge, put the water I had grabbed in my purse and turned to my dad, "I'm kind of in a hurry right now."

"I don't care," he says, crossing his arms, "what you did yesterday at The Bolton's was unacceptable. You yelled at Monica, in front of her small daughter, you disrespected the Boltons and you stormed out. You caused a scene, Gabriella! We raised you better than that. Why would you yell at her like that?!"

"Are you fucking kidding me!?" I couldn't help, but yell. "You're MAD at me?! Seriously?"

"Yes, I'm upset with you! You made a scene, Gabriella!"

Okay, I get that. I really, really get that. But he knows the emotion behind everything I said. He knows the intent. He knows everything. He knows that never in a million years would I EVER talk to someone like that. So the fact that he's looking over it, wow, that boggles my mind and boils my blood. How can he stand here and tell me all of this? I get it. I get it was rude to yell at her. But is he so blinded by love that he didn't hear what she was saying? Maybe she meant no harm, but he for sure should be telling her something along the lines of, you know what? It's very sensitive for her to have a new woman in my life and so maybe please don't flaunt it, please don't talk about what we do, blah blah blah. But no. He doesn't. He's all about Monica right now.

And I'm so fucking sick of this woman coming into our lives and taking over my dad. My dad who I never used to fight with.

"La Gandola? Really, dad?" I ask, tears forming in my eyes. "Why?"

"Gabriella," his voice softened, "it's just a restaurant. I know you're upset and I fully get that, but..."

"Just a restaurant?" I exclaimed, the tears were dried up and I was more mad than ever. "Who even are you?! Just a restaurant? The owners know you, we get free fucking desert there. You took mom there on your first date! We've celebrated birthdays there. It's our restaurant. It's yours and moms and I can't believe you're forgetting all of that. HOW could you?"

He sighed. And shook his head. And it looked like all he wanted to do was walk away from me in this moment, which I'd be more than happy if he did.

But he didn't. He stood there, shaking his head. And then he looked up at me. "I loved your mom more than anything. But she's not here anymore. And she would have wanted me to be happy. You and I both know that, Gabriella."

I do know that. Because my mom was the best. She was the best woman in the whole world.

"You can be happy without making your kids feel like shit," I tell him, "you didn't even come after me, dad! You didn't check on me and how I was feeling!"

"Monica was upset, you had just yelled at her..."

"Oh, Monica was upset!?" I ask with a laugh, "Monica, the woman you've known for less than a year was upset? Well, so was your fucking daughter who you've known for so much longer. If you're hurt by my actions, well guess what, I'm even more hurt by yours!"

My dad just stared at me. A blank stare. Not saying anything at all.

And then Jessica came in.

It looked like she was trying to figure out what was going on, and I'm sure she could hear the fighting from upstairs. "What's going on?"

"What's going on is that dad here, cares more about Monica and her feelings than mine," I explain, "and the longer they hang out, the more he forgets about mom and all the years they had together and the memories. And I'm just so fucking sick of trying to keep it all together. I miss my mother. I miss the way things were. And I can't believe you're acting like you can just replace her because you can't!"

"I'm not trying to replace her!" is all her yells back.

I couldn't say anything right now. I walked out of the kitchen and sat on the couch in the living room adjacent to it. I needed to calm down a bit.

But Jessica was still in there, and knowing her, she'd be cool, calm and collected and try to see both sides of the situation, like always. Because she's the nice one. The sympathetic one. And over all, the better one, I guess. Whatever.

"You know I love you dad," she says and I immediately roll my eyes, "but I gotta side with Gabriella on this one."

"I know it's hard for you girls..."

"No, dad, you don't get it," Jess tells him and my eyes are bugging out. My sister NEVER argues with my dad. EVER. "You're not on the other side of things. How would you feel if we started acting like we have a new dad? It's hard. It's so fucking hard for us and I'm trying to keep it together every single day of my life, but sometimes I just can't. Monica... sure, she's nice and she makes you happy, but you're... it's too much. It's way too much. La Gondala? Switching Gabriella's summer plans because Monica wanted to go to Hawaii on different days? Imagine how we feel. Not only losing our mom, but having to see our dad who did everything with her, who would have done anything FOR her, be with some other woman? A woman who just doesn't seem to get that she can't just come into our family and think we're going to like her because our dad does. It's like, she doesn't get it. She doesn't get that we lost our mom and that we're miserable every damn day about it. And I can't keep it in any longer. I really, really can't."

Holy fuck. Jessica took all the words right out of my mouth. Yes. Yes. Yes. Everything she's saying is exactly what I'm feeling.

I feel like Monica just doesn't get it. She doesn't get that we lost our mom and we're sad and we miss her every fucking day. Because she walks around this house like she's the only woman my dad has every loved and it'd fucking annoying and weird and hurtful.

My dad stayed quiet. I think he was a bit in shock because Jessica has never done something like this. She was always cool, calm, collected and REALLY nice.

And then he just shook his head. "I have to go to work."

That's it? That was his response? That he has to go to FUCKING WORK?

One time, I got into the biggest argument with my mom and my mom had to go to work so there I was, feeling shitty about everything that had just happened and my dad called one of his managers and told him he wouldn't be in for an hour or so. And he took me to get ice cream, we drove around and talked about why my mom was feeling that way, why I was feeling that way and everything felt better afterward.

But today. Nope. Nothing.

My father is changing, is acting like someone I know he's not. And it's breaking my heart.

"Come here," I tell Jess who has tears streaming down her face. She comes over to me, sits down and immediately nuzzles her head into my chest. I put my arms over here and tell her it's okay. "Let it all out if you want."

"Why is he acting like he was never married?" she says in between sobs, "Gabs, she was our mom, the love of his life. He literally did not get out of bed for two fucking weeks after everything that happened, but now suddenly, this woman comes in and he's a completely different person."

I knew she understood, but I also thought she was all for my dad's happiness and yadda yadda yadda.

But I guess she was just putting on a brave face.

"It's hard," I tell her, sitting up a bit and wiping the tears off her beautiful face. She looked like my mom so much. They both has the same long, beautiful eyelashes that I was so jealous of. "He's trying to make his new girlfriend happy and he doesn't realize in the process of that, he's hurting us."

"Monica has been nice to me," she says, leaning forward and grabbing the convenient napkin that was on the coffee table, "and I don't think she actually wants dad to forget about mom, but I feel like she thinks she should be his priority and that coming in here and not actually taking the time to know us, just being with dad, it's just... too much."

Exactly. That's exactly how I feel, too. And that's why I had a little outburst at the Boltons.

Right now, though, we need each other more than ever.

I never wanted to be home. My sister looks so much like my mom that it was hard to look at her. I'd look at my dad and he was sad. So I just never wanted to be home and be around them because it was way too hard. But now that my dad is now with someone else and doesn't look sad anymore and that time has past where I can't just act like a brat and careless for no reason, I'm home. And I'm coping. And I'm still trying to get through everything.

And Jessica, my sweet Jessica, is the best sister I could ever ask for and I can't believe how I've treated her these months.

"I'm sorry for being the worst big sister, ever," I apologize to her after she lets everything out. "I shouldn't have acted the way I acted and I'm sorry."

"We all deal differently," she shrugs, "and I think I've reached my breaking point."

True. Jessica has never really let herself cry over it. Unless she's done it in the privacy of her own room. She was the strongest one. And she was 15 at the time. Like, that says a lot about her. Just like my mom. But I don't think she's ever really coped because she wanted to be there for us, she wanted to put on a brave face. And that meant everything.

But I don't think I appreciated it the way I should. And I feel so badly about that because she really is the best.

And she's been such a rock for me and my dad throughout all these months of being without her.

"Okay," I say, getting up and pushing her off. "Go change. We're gonna go grab some Fatburger and then visit mom and then go shopping at Barney's in her honor because that was her absolute favorite thing to do in life."

"You're not going to the beach?" she asks with a small smile as she sniffles.

I was. But I realized that my sister needs me right now and I need her and I need to show her and we need to do this whole thing together.

So I shake my head, get up off the couch and give her my hand to get her up. "Nah, the beach can wait. I wanna spend time with my sister and my mom and talk about everything like we used to do with her."

This is what we'd do. She'd tell us to get ready, and then she'd drive us to Barney's and we'd shop around, trying things on, being silly and whatnot. And then we would go to Fatburger and sit there and eat and talk and laugh. And share things with each other. Share everything with each other.

So, this is what we're going to do today. Me and my baby sister.

And my mom is going to be right there with us in spirit, like she always is.

Like she is right now.


	9. Chapter 9

I wish I hadn't come to this stupid party.

But I was basically dragged and so here I am, wanting to go home so badly.

My friend Cassidy was with me and it was her idea to come and I don't know, I had nothing else going on. I was still not talking to my dad really, Jessica was going out with her best friends and I'm pretty sure Monica was going to come over so fuck that, I had to get out of the house.

So, this sounded like a better option because all my other friends were busy. Well, not Soph, but she's sick.

Cassidy's nowhere to be found and neither was Parker.

Yes, fucking Parker was here because apparently he knows everyone and is just at every single party. It was seriously such a coincidence.

I barely know anyone here, though. The girlfriend of the guy throwing it, and some other people, but still, barely anymore so it's not that fun for me. And I've been here for an hour. I just want to go home and go to sleep or something, ugh.

"Here," Parker hands me the cup of water he said he'd get me.

"Thanks," I take it from him.

And then he sat next to me, grabbed my face and kissed me, which, usually doesn't happen in public. Ugh.

Like I've said, Parker and I were just hooking up. But we weren't exclusive and we weren't showing PDA ever. So yeah, it kind of took me by surprise just now and I kind of just pulled away and looked around, drank my water and tried to not let it happen.

It's a very weird situation, for sure. Well, not weird... I don't know what it is.

He's just always there when I'm feeling down and need to go out and have some fun or something. You know, drive around Los Angeles and pick friends up and then go back to his place and down a few shots. Then make out in his bedroom for hours until I fall asleep. And then in the morning, I'll wake up and go home and I won't talk to him for another few days or whatever.

But I am so not in the right mind frame to have a boyfriend. Nor do I want one, I think.

"Park, I'm not really in the mood."

"Fuck, Gabriella," he takes his lips off my neck and groans, "what's the matter with you? Two months ago, you couldn't keep your hands off of me."

Um, I wouldn't exactly say it like that. But I was more willing than I am right now, for sure. So I get his frustration. And if this was the other way around, I'd be a little pissed off too. But two months ago, I didn't know this mysterious Troy. And I didn't have this fucking crush on some other guy.

Yes, crush. I have a freaking crush on Troy Bolton.

And it definitely did not help that he was at this party we were at right now.

Like I said, I don't know the person throwing the party, so it's just such a fucking coincidence Troy is, too. And all I wanna do is go talk to him for some bizarre reason even though the last words out of my mouth to him were "fuck you." But I'd much rather talk to him than sit here and get my neck sucked by some guy who I don't really have those romantic feelings for. And I can't have his lips on me when I'm thinking about some other guy, it's weird.

"Who do you keep staring at?" he looks where I was looking, but thankfully, it's just some girl who's standing there now.

"No one. I'm just really tired. I, um, I had orientation today."

"Then why did we come here?" he asks, sitting up a bit, "we can go back to my place. My parents aren't home. Doesn't that sound like some fun?"

Nope. Not at all.

Usually, it does. But not anymore.

"Hold on. I'm gonna go find Cass really quick," I give him a small smile so he doesn't think I'm saying no.

And with that, I get up and go find Cassidy because I really need to talk to her about what I should do. About how to cut this thing off. I mean, I think I want to. But maybe in a week when I realize how stupid it is to have a crush on Troy, I'll go back to wanting to just have fun with Parker. I don't know, it's confusing. And I really don't want it to be. I want a clear answer dammit.

I walk inside this giant house, expecting to have to look for Cass, but much to my surprise, she's literally standing right there talking to some guys.

And when I go up to her, I realize she's talking to Troy and this guy I don't even know. Wow. How fucking awesome.

"Cass," I grab her by the waist a bit, "can I talk to you?"

"Gabs!" she slurred, throwing her arm over my shoulder and giving me a side hug, "where have you been? We came together, we should be hanging out together silly! Wanna meet my new friends?"

I looked over at Troy and this guy and they were just standing there, giggling at drunk Cass. "Sure."

She points to Troy, "this is Troy Bolton, isn't he so hot? And this Marcus, who's equally as hot. So many hot guys in the Valley, huh?"

They both laugh, I kind of just giggle and roll my eyes to myself and tell them it's nice to meet them, even though I know Troy. Whatever.

"I think I'm gonna get going," I tell her since she's obviously not pulling away to talk to me in private, "are you okay?"

"Why are you leaving?" she snaps her head towards me, "Gabriella Montez leaving a party early? Are you fucking kidding me, are you okay? Are you sick or something? Oh my gosh. Don't tell me you're going back to Parker's house. I'll drop kick you right now."

Ahhh stop talking, Cass! How embarrassing. "Um, no, I'm just not really in the mood. You okay?"

She waves me off as she sips on her drink, "Jenna's giving me a ride home so yeah, I'll be totally fine. Don't you worry about me. I'm gonna party all night long… for the both of us. Call me tomorrow!"

I'm so glad she didn't ask anymore questions. I didn't have an answer. I just wanted to go home or go somewhere else that wasn't here. That wasn't some party. I wasn't feeling it. I didn't like how I only knew a handful of people here. I didn't like how Parker was so needy right now. I didn't like how it was far from my house. I don't wanna be driving too late. I was just… over it. And I wanted to go home.

"Okay, be safe. Call me if you need anything," I tell her.

And then with that, I turned around and walked away, but not before I heard my name being called.

I turned back around, and was face to face with Troy Bolton. And his beautiful face. His beautiful blue eyes. Oh my gosh. He's so fucking hot. "Yeah?"

"Would you mind giving me a ride?"

"What?" I spit out and it probably sounds a little rude, I was just surprised. Our last conversation… I wasn't exactly nice to him. "I mean, sure."

He smiles at me and then chuckles, "sorry. I came with a friend, I kind of want to leave and I know you're from the same general area so... if you're not heading that way, though, then it's totally fine."

I'm not. I definitely do not want to go to Parker's. "No, yeah, it's fine, I can give you a ride."

And with that, we walked out of the party and made our way to my car.

I didn't even tell Parker goodbye.

* * *

"If you make a pit stop to get some ice cream, I'll buy you some."

"What?" I turn to him as I stop at the red light. I heard him, but it's just the first thing to come out. "Ice cream from where?"

He shrugs as he puts his phone down on his lap, "sprinkles? Wherever, really. I'm just really craving some ice cream, but if you're not down, that's fine."

I guess I am down. I mean, I love ice cream. And I love Sprinkles. And I have absolutely nothing else to do except go to Sophia's or go home, so yeah, sure, I'm down. "Yeah, no, that's fine. We can go." But I'm definitely buying my own ice cream.

20 minutes later, we were sitting at a table outside eating our ice cream, enjoying the nice LA summer weather.

Seriously, it's almost 10 pm outside and it's, like, 80 degrees still. There's not a single star in the sky. But I don't think I'd have it any other way. I love Southern California and I'm really happy I'm not moving away for college.

"So why'd you wanna leave early?" Troy asks as he takes a bite of his red velvet ice cream, "are you going somewhere else?"

"I didn't want to be there," I shrugged.

It looked like he didn't believe me. Like, at all. "You didn't want to be there?"

Yes. I didn't want to be there. How hard is that for him to understand? "Do you think I'm lying or something? Why would I be getting ice cream if I have somewhere else to be?"

"No, yeah, you're right," he chuckles, "just thought you were a party girl. Never one to miss a good one. And well, that was a good one."

"Why would you think that? You barely know me."

He shrugs as he takes a lick, "your friend. And well, you did go to a party in the valley where you guys hardly knew anyone. The only people who would do that are people who are always down for a party, don't you think?"

Okay, whatever, he has a good point. But honestly, I was pretty much dragged. And after the day I had today, a party seemed like a good idea so whatever, I let myself get dragged by Cass. And the fact that Parker was going to be there made me think it could be alright, but when I got there and realized I'm not into this whole thing with Parker anymore, I wanted to bail right away. Then Troy showed up and made me realize I have a fucking crush on him. So um, yeah, I definitely wanted to leave.

"Oh, yeah, you have me all figured out."

"I don't have you figured out at all," he shakes his head, "you're kind of a mystery, Gabriella Montez."

"A mystery?" What in the world is he talking about? I'm not mysterious at all. I wear every emotion on my face at all times, probably.

He nods, licking the corner of his lips. "I just feel like there are so many layers to you."

Um, sure. I guess so. I don't really know, actually. I'm not a really complicated person. I've had an amazing life, I didn't grow up with any problems, really. And I haven't had to overcome anything. My life is... blessed. "I mean, sure, there's a lot about me that you don't know."

"Yeah, that's what I meant," he said and then forward and gave me a small smile. "And I'm sure there is."

"Okay," is all I say, which is REALLY dumb. Why did that come out?

He laughed and leaned back and continued eating his ice cream as I ate mine and this is fucking weird. There's an elephant in the room. Well, we're outside, but whatever. A huge one. I yelled at him. I made a scene at his house. He told me I should apologize to Monica.

And now, we're here... pretending it didn't happen?

Or what is going on? I really have no idea. But I feel a bit awkward just sitting here.

But it was like he was reading my mind because after a short silence, he apologized. "You know, I'm sorry for the other day... for telling you to apologize to Monica. I shouldn't be telling you what to do. I'm not your brother, I'm not... anything to you. I don't know what you go through everyday or how everything is for you. And so, I'm really sorry."

"Oh," I say, and think about it for a second. I mean, I accept. "It's okay."

"It's just... Monica was crying and I felt bad and I'm not going to get in the middle," he shakes his head, "so I'm sorry about that."

Jessica told me she had tears or whatever and I rolled my eyes at that, but that was in front of Jessica. I'm not going to do it in front of Troy and make him think I'm this insensitive bitch. God, no, that's the last thing I want from a hot guy like him. So I just give him a small smile instead and shrug it off.

He apologized. It's fine. I'm over it. Well, him telling me what he did.

I'm not exactly over the Monica thing yet.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it," I kinda do, he has a loyalty to her so whatever, "it's all good."

"Okay, cool."

And then we sat there and finished out ice cream.

* * *

"I kind of forgot where you live…"

Lie. I didn't forget where he lived. I know exactly where he lives. But I didn't want to be creepy or anything like that.

He looked up from whatever he was doing on his phone and realized where we were. "Oh, um, make a right at the stop sign."

I knew I had to make a right coming up, that's why I said something. He was too busy on his phone to even notice we were approaching his neighborhood. But whatever, I can't be mad at him for it because well… we're nothing. I don't even think we're friends, to be honest.

After he told me to make a right, it was pretty clear where he lived so I pulled into the neighborhood and stopped at the gate. "Do you wanna get out and punch your code in?"

"Nah," he leans back, "it's 389."

"Okay," I whisper back, surprised he told me.

I mean, some of my friends don't even know my code. I just leave their name at the gate. It's hard to trust people around here, so it was kind of a surprise.

But I punched in his code, the gates opened, and in I drove.

He told me to go straight, make a right and then another right on his street name and it's towards the middle-ish. So I did just that. And I remembered all of that from the last time but I let him pretend I didn't. It's better that way.

Once we were in front of his house, we kind of just sat there until I broke the silence.

"Can I use your phone to call my dad? Mine's dead."

"Sorry," he tells me before holding his phone up and pressing the home button which flashes a dead battery, indicating you need to put it on the charger immediately. "Mine just died, too."

"Great," I lightly sigh so I'm not too dramatic about it, "never mind."

Troy opens the door, but he doesn't get out. He sits there for a moment and then turns to me, "you can use the house phone if you want."

If that's my only option, I'll take it Or else, I'll be forced to go home. The one rule I always follow is that I have to tell my dad where I'm going at all times. So I can't go to Sophia's house and call him from there and tell him I'm at Sophia's. I have to tell him before. I'm not exactly sure for this rule, but I always follow it. And that's exactly what I want to do right now… go to Sophia's and just lay in bed with her and watch movies and eat chips. So you know, I might have to take him up on that offer.

"Okay," I unbuckled, "because I really need to call my dad."

He nodded, unbuckled himself, got out of my car and made his way to the front door of his house.

Once inside, he immediately took off his jacket and threw in on a chair.

And then he went to his house phone, took it off the handset and handed it to me before he disappeared into his living room. I kind of just lingered around the foyer as I called my dad. I'm mad at him, but I have to call. It's a rule set in stone. So, I told him what was going on and he okay'd it because well, he's trying to get in my good graces I think so right now, he'd let me do anything. I should take advantage of it, but eh.

"Thanks," I tell Troy once I hang out and hand the phone back.

"No problem," he grabs it and throws it on the couch behind him, "everything okay?"

I nod, "yeah, everything's fine. Just checking in."

Troy smiles and then rubbed the back of his neck. I notice it's something he does often. Well, I don't know if often, but I've seen him do it a couple of times. And it's seriously the sexiest thing, ever, for some reason.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Like what?" he asks.

Usually I'm not one to call someone out, but he was just staring at me, like, he's happy about me checking in with my dad or something. Like he's on his team, making sure I'm behaving or whatever. I don't really know how to describe it. "Like, you're proud of me for checking in with my dad."

He shakes his head and lets out a small laugh, "nah, I'm not thinking about that at all. I'm actually thinking about how fucking beautiful you look right now. And how I love that shirt you're wearing."

What? He's joking, right? I'm not actually hearing him correctly….

He HAS to be joking. I know he is because this shirt… I got ice cream on it. And that's exactly why he's saying it, right?

"Shut up," a smile appears on my face and I try my hardest to make light of the situation, "it's not funny. This is one of my favorite shirts, ever."

"I'm not kidding," he says, all serious. He pushes himself off from the couch and takes a step towards me. His blue eyes are looking into mine and it's so intimidating that I really just want to run out of his house right now. What is happening? "I really do love the shirt and I think it looks really good on you."

Sometimes when guys say that, it could come off as creepy and totally gross.

But not Troy. For some reason, it makes me feel... good.

Is he about to...? No, there's no way he's about to kiss me. The last time we talked, I yelled at him.

I told him to mind his own business. I told him he doesn't know what I deal with. I told him that I can act and feel whatever way I want. And then I basically told him to go shove it or whatever. So, not my kindest moment. And I definitely did not expect him to ever say those things to me.

There's absolutely no ways he's into me after he saw me act like that even though he apologized and I accepted.

But I look beautiful right now? Swoon.

"Um, I should get going," I chicken out. I can't be here. "I have to..."

"You have to what?" he comes closer, closing some of the space between us.

Suddenly, I forgot what I was going to say. Because all I can think about is Troy in front of me and what I think is going to happen. I think he's going to kiss me and I think I might have a panic attack because of it. I mean, how could I not? I have a crush on him and it looks like it's going to happen...

Usually, I'm not shy. But Troy. There's just something about him that makes me melt a little bit. Also, I barely know this guy. I know enough to have a fucking crush on him, but not enough to do anything about it or wonder how it'll be like between us.

But once I see him give me a tiny smile, I know he's not just teasing me, so I go for it. I wrap my hands around his neck and put my lips on his.

And we kiss. Our first kiss.

He immediately brings his hands to my face and gently cups it.

I waste no time deepening the kiss. My arms fall to the side and I latch on to his waist and push him towards the couch. He moves his lips against mine and before I know it, my tongue is begging for entrance, which he grants almost immediately.

And we stand there, him leaning against the couch, me leaning on him, making out for a good three minutes or so.

Seriously, he's SUCH a good kisser.

I don't really want to stop. I don't want to stop tasting him and feeling what I'm feeling, but I know I have to. I know I have to pull away for air.

"Um, I..." I don't even really know what I'm trying to say, it just came out.

Troy chuckled a bit before pressing his lips against mine again. And within seconds, we were back to making out. We were back to playing tonsil hockey. And I was back to feeling butterflies in my stomach and chills running up and down my spine. And trying to figure out what the hell was going on.

When we pulled away for a second time, it was for good. I had to get going. I wanted to get going.

"You don't have to go..." he tells me and it makes me smile.

"The last time we were together, I basically screamed in your face," I remind him, "why on earth is this happening?"

He laughs as he throws his head back and then he looks me straight in the eyes and chuckles. He shakes his head and shrugs, "I'm not really sure. There's just something about you, Gabriella Montez. You could yell at me and I'd still want to do that."

Um. Okay. I wasn't expecting this answer. It's giving me major butterflies.

Because I honestly didn't think he liked me... even in a friend way even if he's been nothing but nice to me the handful of times I saw him around.

"I'm not sure I believe that," I call him out.

"Well, that's up to you," he tells me, putting his hands on my waist, "but it's the truth."

I'm not really sure what to say or what to do now. Where to go from here. I'm just so shocked by everything that has just happened. I never expected this to happen. I mean, I thought about kissing him. I thought about what it'd be like. But I didn't think it would actually happen. Nope.

So I don't really know where to go from here. But I'm going to be upfront about it. "I don't really know what to say."

"Say you'll have dinner with me."

"Dinner?" Fuck. Like a date? This is scary. I don't know about that.

He chuckles a bit and smiles, "yeah, dinner. Tomorrow night. Wherever you want."

Oh boy. I'd be an idiot to say no. I'd be an idiot to walk away from him. He's so beautiful, it hurts. And he seems so put together. He seems like a good catch so yeah, I want to say yes, but it's scary. It's scary putting yourself out there when you don't know if it could actually work out or not, you know?

But like my mom always said, you have to take chances. Or you'll never get anywhere in life.

And maybe taking this chance could be great. But I won't know until I take it... so here I am. "Dinner sounds great."

"Great," Troy smiles at me.

This day just went from bad to great. Really great, actually.

And now I can't wait for dinner tomorrow.


	10. Chapter 10

"So, how was high school for you?" Troy asks as he grabs a sushi from the middle of the table.

"High school?" I look up at him.

He shrugged, "yeah, like, you're graduated now. How was it for you?"

I didn't expect this question, but I mean, it's not a bad question at all. He's making conversation. Like he has been for the past thirty minutes.

So I'll answer. It just caught me a little off guard because I don't know. I feel like people ask this question when they're older, but whatever. "I had the time of my life. I went to Beverly Hills High, and it was pretty great. I've had the same group of friends since the 5th grade so going through high school with them was great. You know, besides my mom dying. But I had a great experience. Great friends, great memories..."

"That's good," he says, "so, you'll probably miss it?"

"I'll miss it, yeah. But I'm sure college will be even better. More people, more things to do."

"True," Troy smiles at me.

This was a bit weird. I've never been on a date with someone who I already know I can like. Someone who I've kissed and I know there's something there, some sort of spark. It's never happened, and so, sitting across the table, making small talk like this is a bit... weird. But whatever.

I know about Troy, but not a whole lot, so I guess now's the time to find out.

He's going to USC in the fall, he graduated from Pacific Palisades High School, and he thinks he wants to major in business... just like me.

This is all stuff I found out the last time I saw him at his house. We watched Seinfeld, talked about Seattle, and then I realized I hardly knew anything about him, well just school stuff and so I asked him. USC in the fall.

Which is pretty impressive. I didn't apply there, because I was set on going to UCLA, but not sure I'd get in.

I know he's funny and can crack a joke, I know he's nice and everything, but beyond that... I don't know much. And I want to get to know him.

"If you could go ANYWHERE in the world right now where would you go?"

"Anywhere?" he asks, then ponders about it for a moment. "This restaurant in Dallas, Texas because I hear the have the best ribs."

WHAT? He could choose ANYWHERE. Any continent, any country, any city and he choose Dallas? A short plane ride? A one day road trip? He is serious? Dallas, Texas? "Wait, are you joking?"

He laughs, "no, I'm not. I know people give a more elaborate answer, but ribs are my favorite food in the world and so I wanna try that place out."

Well, that's good, I guess. I love food. I'd wanna go to a specific place just for the food as well.

When Troy turns the question back on me, I suddenly don't really want to answer. It's grand and far and elaborate and his was so simple and so down to earth and I don't wanna make it seem like I'm some spoiled brat who has money so of course I'd want to go to Dubai.

But I'm not going to lie. "I've always wanted to go to Dubai."

"Dubai?" he looks intrigued, "One of my aunts actually went there two summers ago, she loved it. Told us we have to go sometime."

"Yeah," I smile, feeling a bit at ease, "I've only heard great things. Looks fascinating."

As Troy was about to say something else, the waiter came and asked if everything was okay. We both asked for another iced tea. He walked away and Troy and I were back at staring at each other, with a small smile on our faces.

God, he was so beautiful.

And I really couldn't believe I was sitting in front of him right now... on a date. A fucking date with the most attractive man I've ever seen.

My dad doesn't know. I didn't tell him because well, I'm not sure how he's take the news. I don't think he'd want me to date him just because it's too close to comfort, you know? If nothing happens, or if something terrible happens, it's going to be awkward... as long as my dad and Monica are together.

"Are you close to your sister?" is his next question.

"She's my best friend," I nod, "yeah, as close as sister's could be. We're only a year and a half apart."

"Oh." he leans back in the booth a bit, taking a break from his sushi intake.

I'm not sure why he responded like that. It was kinda weird. So of course, I have to ask. "Oh?"

He shakes his head, "no, sorry.I just... I asked, but I don't know, the few times I've been around you both, I got the vibe that you guys weren't that close. But no, I guess I was wrong. Not sure why I'm even bringing this up. I'm sorry."

"It's okay," I don't want him to feel bad about it. It's a question. We're on a date. He's trying to get to know me, right? "We're extremely close. Sisters, best friends. The past year or so, it's been tough. I kind of shut her out, because as silly as it sounds, she reminds me so much of my mom that it was hard to even look at her. And she was walking around like she was okay, while I was still crying so it was a hard balance. But it's better, it's good. We're fine."

"She seems cool," he smiles, "she reminds you of your mom?"

I smile, "yeah. So, I'm glad I seem to have a piece of my mom around. They're, like, twins basically."

Troy looked lie he wanted to know more about my mom, but I just couldn't talk about it too much. Maybe not in this setting, on a first date.

But he must have seen my face change or my smile drop or something because he changed the subject completely. "Your dad's from up North. Do you get to visit often? Where exactly is he from?"

"Napa Valley," I reach for the iced tea the waiter dropped off a few moments ago. "My grandma and grandpa are down here now so not as much as I would like. But yeah, his siblings, all my aunts and uncles are still up there so a few times a year. They come down a lot, too. I love NorCal, though, it's cool."

"Yeah, I was thinking about going to school up there. Berkeley, or maybe San Francisco. But it's hard to leave LA."

"You didn't wanna leave?"

He shrugged, "I could handle it, but USC is a great school."

True. One of the best. "Yeah, it is. Are you going to be living at home or dorming?"

"Probably at home," he shrugs, "yeah, it's not far and it's a waste of money to dorm. I'll leave it for people who actually need to. But I'll probably move out, get an apartment with a friend or something my second or maybe third year. Have some sort of independence."

"Yeah, that's what I'm thinking about doing," I nod.

Even though, now more than ever, I wanna get out of my home. Monica's probably going to be coming over more and this fighting with my dad is probably going to get worse. And I just can't deal. But I'm obviously not going to tell him that. I can't insult Monica anymore in front of him. They're like family. It's like him insulting my sister or something. It's just not cool and I wouldn't like it. So of course he wouldn't like if I said anything bad.

We sat here and talked more about life and it was nice. There was no awkward silence, ever.

He told him me all abut his childhood, I told him about a trip I took to London, and we exchanged stories and things about our lives for another hour.

And I think it was the best, first date.

* * *

"Do you wanna come in?"

"Sure," Troy shrugs as I stand in front of my door and open it.

My dad's not home. He went to some 50th birthday party with my uncle and I'm not sure what time they're coming home, but it's still kind of early. 10. We spent an hour and a half at the restaurant and then we grabbed some ice cream and now here we are, at my house.

Jessica wasn't home, either. She was staying at her friends house for the night.

So it was just the two of us...

"Sorry," I tell Troy as Coco is jumping at his feet, "she loves guys."

"I don't mind," he laughs and bent over to pick up this little Maltese of a dog, "she's so cute."

"She is, huh?" I tell him, closing the door and putting my keys in the key tray and my purse on the chair we keep in the foyer for some reason. I stood there for a minute as Coco sniffed his face and Troy chuckled. It's weird when you see a guy his age fawn over a tiny pup. Usually, they like bigger dogs. But Coco has a way of making people fall in love with her. "She's our pride and joy."

Troy turned to me, with Coco still in his arms, "I bet. How long have you had her?"

Oh wow. How long have I had her? Fuck. Why isn't it coming to me? Think, Gabriella, think. Oh. "About five years. We have three others."

"I know," he says, "Maddie wouldn't stop talking about them when I picked her up that one day."

"She loved them," I smiled, thinking about that day.

It was the day Troy and I really talked. Where I realized that I had a small crush on him. It wasn't just for his looks anymore, it was about what he sad to say and he just seemed like a cool guy. And Maddie playing with the dogs outside was the cutest thing I had ever seen. She was SO in love with them.

At night, if I'm at home, I love nothing more than going outside, sitting on my patio and hanging out with them.

So that is what I suggest we do. "Let's go hang out with them."

He laughed and just followed me to the back, Coco still in his arms, looking as cute as ever.

Chloe, Sasha and Dakota all wagged their tails and nuzzled up to us as soon as we got outside. Sasha, the queen of fetching, grabbed her ball right away and brought it over to me. Dakota, all she wants is to be pet so Troy took care of that. And Chloe is OBSESSED with Coco, so when Troy put her down, Chloe snuggled right up to her, with Coco kissing her right back.

"You guys don't have any dogs?"

"We do," Troy's still petting Dakota, "the day of the BBQ, they were at the groomers getting groomed."

Oh that explains it. "What kind are they? We're kinda obsessed with dogs around here."

He laughed, "I can tell, but that's cool. They always have someone to play with. We have a chocolate lab and a yellow lab. They're best friends."

I love labs so much. I love all dogs, really, but the breeds I have are my favorite. I never thought I'd like having a little Maltese but my mom insisted on getting her so we did. And I loved all of them equally. We're a serious dog family around here.

"Hey, thanks for coming out with me tonight."

The mood shifted a bit. It was still light, but with a hint of seriousness. "Oh, no, thank you for dinner. It was delicious."

He smiled at turned back to Dakota who was handing him her paw and asking him to pet her some more. "You're different than I thought."

"What?" I turn to him. We've had a small conversation like this. He told me he thought there were many layers to me and I told him that he didn't know everything about me. But that's different than what he's saying. He thought I was something else? "How did you think I was?"

"I don't know, a little more... Beverly Hillsy," he says.

I have NO idea what he means by that because so many people have different perceptions. "Care to elaborate?"

He laughed and shook his head, like he regrets saying anything. "No, it's just... for a little while now, I've been just wanting to hang out with you, but in the back of my mind, I thought you could be one way since I didn't know you very well and girls around here, they think they should have everything handed to them. And I just feel like you're really grounded and you're polite and you're kind to people around you."

Is he fucking with me? I was SO rude to Monica. But that's not how I normally am. That is NOT how my parents raised me at all. My mom, especially.

"How did you see a difference?"

"Just tonight. The way you are in a social environment, how you didn't care that our waiter got your order wrong and you happily waited for a new roll instead of letting it put a damper on the evening. It's hard to explain. I just... I know I'm putting my foot in my mouth, you're just... so..."

I didn't let him finish whatever he was trying to say, I just turned to him and put my lips on his.

And I shut him up.

He immediately put his hand on the back of my head and kissed me back. And there we were, kissing in my backyard, with my dogs all around us probably watching. I moved in closer and put my hand on his face, moving my lips against his, begging for entrance, which he granted me almost immediately. He tasted so good. Like mint. And I wanted more. I needed more.

Somehow, I found myself sitting on his lap, and my hands started running through his hair as his lips kissed my neck ever so gently.

"Troy," I breathe out as he kisses my soft spot, the spot that makes me want to moan. But I keep it in.

He then pulls away and I pull away and we look into each others eyes for a moment. I don't know what is it, but I think in this moment we decide that there's something here between us and we want to explore it some more, for sure.

I put my lips back on his and kiss him some more, as much as I possibly can before we both have to come up for air.

Screw Parker. Troy Bolton is hands down the best kisser.

But as his hands found their way up my shirt a bit, I kind of freaked out. But I played it cool. I kissed him a bit more and then stopped and got off his lap and sat down on the chair I originally was in. I didn't want to make a big deal about it, but I don't know where he was trying to go with that. I just know that I'm not having sex with him. Who knows if he thought it could go that far, but no, absolutely not.

Troy leaned forward a bit and brought his forehead close to mind, almost touching the two, before he whispered, "go out with me again."

I couldn't help, but swoon. "Okay."

And just like that, I think Troy and I are starting something here.

It's way too early to tell, though, but there's just something about him that makes me want to forget about the fact that having a guy in my life, a guy that could potentially lead to a boyfriend, is not a good idea. He makes me want to forget that and just go with the flow.

So that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm just going to do what makes me happy in the moment.

And right now, that's kissing Troy Bolton.


	11. Chapter 11

"Can I talk to you?"

My dad turns around and sees me standing there before he mutes the TV. "What's up?"

Ugh, I hate that I'm about to do this, but I just hate the tension. I hate the awkwardness. I hate everything about being mad at my dad because he has done everything and anything for me my whole life. He's the number one guy in my life and it's hard living with him and not talking like we used to.

"I'm sorry," I tell him, coming around the couch, "for you know..."

"It's okay," he says, moving one of the pillows on the couch so I can take a seat. "I know you and I know you don't act like that, you're kind and you're polite and you're respectful and it was just in the heat of the moment, I know that."

He does know that, but I think I meant it. "But dad, I'm not sure I can apologize for _what_ I said. Just you know, for saying it there and causing a scene."

I'm not sure I should have said that, I think I'm taking a step backwards, but I need to be honest with him.

"Look, I get it. There's a new woman in your life," I continue telling him, taking a seat on the couch now, "and you really like her and she's great, but how can you not see what we're going through? You're blinded by love, maybe, but Monica has NEVER once tried to get to know us. She has never come up to us and initiated a convo or anything like that. Maybe she's scared, maybe she doesn't know how, but if so, fine. But she shouldn't be walking around the place like she owns it, like she should be the number one woman in your life. And it's honestly worrisome that you don't see that. Why don't you see that?!"

"Gabriella," he says, and I already know where this direction is headed...

So I'm not going to engage. I'm going to keep the relationship I have with my dad separate and not let Monica affect me.

I get up before I get mad and upset. "No, it's fine, I get it. I just wanted to say I'm really sorry for the way I acted. I know better and it won't happen again."

And with that, I walked out. He called my name, but I didn't turn around because I really didn't want to hear what he had to say. I just wanted him to know that the way I acted was not right and I will never cause another scene like that and embarrass him.

As I'm walking to the stairs to go upstairs, I hear the doorbell ring so I head to the door.

When I answer, though, I'm less than pleased.

It's Monica.

"Gabriella," she says, like she's seen a ghost or something. "Hi."

It's the first time I've seen her since the BBQ and that was exactly two weeks ago. Of course she's been over, but I've not been home or I just stayed in my room until they were off to wherever they were headed. And now, she's standing in front of me, at my house.

Fuuuuck. "Hi."

My dad comes over and takes the door from me, opening it more, giving her a smile. "Hey."

She walks in, I move out of the way and her and my dad nervously give each other a kiss. It's obviously something they do now when they see each other, give the other one a kiss, but I'm also sure they felt awkward about it now since I basically yelled at her. She probably feels uncomfortable and you know what? I don't think I really care. This is how she should be acting, how she always should have been acting when she came over.

"We're going to grill some steaks," my dad tells me, "are you girls hungry?"

"Oh," I say, surprised that this is the first I'm hearing about this. Why didn't he mention it earlier? "No, I was actually gonna go to dinner."

"With whom?" he asks, closing the door.

Fuck. I have no dinner plans. why can't I just spit two names out?! "Bree and her sister. Nobu in Malibu."

He looked at Monica and then back at me and nodded, "okay, that's fine. While you're out there, you mind popping into the restaurant and giving a check to Jose? I told him I'd get it to him by tomorrow, but I'm not sure I'll have time to go out there."

"Sure," I restaurant and Nobu are in close proximity, so whatever.

It's so awkward. Extremely awkward. And I hate it.

Sure, I definitely need to apologize for yelling at her. But does no one think she owes me an apology? Is she not going to take a step back and think, wow am I really making this girl feel this way? Does she actually think I'm trying to replace her mom? And she could approach me and talk about it. But no. She's silent as well and she's not making an effort to talk to me so it's really just the most awkward, annoying situation.

I'm trying not to think about it too much so right away, I go upstairs and I call any of my friends and ask if they wanna go to Malibu. Tori's in. And so is my friend Bree, thank God! I didn't really have to lie to my dad.

And when I come out of my room, Jessica is emerging. "Where are you going? Did I hear someone come?"

"Yeah, Monica's here, they're grilling steaks, so I'm getting out of here," I tell her, fixing my shirt a bit, "you're not going back to Sean's for dinner?"

"Nah," she shakes her head, "he threw up earlier so I'm staying clear."

Ew. The worst. "Well, come with Bree, Tor and I to Nobu. I told dad I was going, so I'm making them go with me. It'll be fun. I have to stop by the restaurant first to give Jose a check. We can grab froyo after."

Jessica was in. She loved Nobu and froyo. And I'm sure she wanted to get out of the house as well even though it's not awkward between her and Monica. She's also apologized to my dad, but there's still tension there and so she likes to avoid them altogether... just like me.

So we're off.

And we let Monica and my dad do their thing... ugh.

* * *

"Are your other dogs jealous?"

"Probably," I laugh as I throw the ball to Sasha so she could fetch it.

Troy grabbed his water and chugged almost half of it before letting out a small laugh, "I'd be, too. It's such a beautiful day."

It was a beautiful day. A perfect beach day. And that's exactly how we're spending our day today... at the beach. Dog beach. With Sasha. He was going to bring his dogs, but he didn't after all, so I decided to bring Sash. She LOVED the water, she loved fetching and she was the nicest one to me today so she was the lucky winner who got to come along.

It's our second hang out and I feel... good. It feels nice. I'm comfortable. Conversation is flowing. And it's just nice.

"Pretty sure this is why I could never move away from California," I sink my feet in the sand.

"Oh, no way," he leans back a bit, holding himself up with his elbows, "I think I was at the beach pretty much every day last summer. I love it."

I loved the beach, too. So when he suggested we go, I was all for it. I thought it might be another dinner or lunch or something, but no. Isn't that how second dates usually go? Another dinner. Or you move it up to lunch so it's more casual? I'm not sure. But I liked this. I liked being at the beach with him.

Plus, he had his shirt off. What's better than that?

"Sash!" I called her name when I saw her sniffing another dog. She came almost instantly with her ball in her mouth, ready for me to throw it again.

"Are you gonna get in the water?" Troy turns to me as Sasha runs off.

Is that his way of telling me he wants me to take my shirt off? No, Gabriella, you idiot. That's not what he's saying. He's merely wondering, probably. So give him an answer! "Probably not. I mean, maybe I'll put my feet in. I'm not a big fan of ocean water."

He nods, looking ahead, "yea, but it's refreshing sometimes. I think just being here, watching the water is good enough."

"Yeah, that's what I love doing. Laying out, maybe playing some beach volleyball."

"We should have invited more people then!"

Uhhhh, maybe, but that would mean we would have each invited our friends and them meeting each other would be weird. Like, we're barely anything. But maybe he doesn't see it like this is all really casual to him. Who knows. I'm still feeling it out. But that comment made me feel a little... weird.

Not weird. Just, I don't know. I don't know how to explain it.

"What happened there?" he changed the subject, pointing to a scar on my leg, that's just above knee.

"Oh," I touch it, laughing a bit, "it's stupid. My friend open the car door, didn't realize I was standing right there and pretty much threw it against my leg."

"Ouch, did it hurt?"

I shrugged, "it happened so fast. I think so. I mean, it cut it. Eventually, scarred."

He look a closer look at it. It wasn't gross or anything, it could even come off as a birthmark or something, but it was there and it was visible. And I didn't really care to hide it. "Doesn't look bad at all."

"Nah, it happened like 5 years ago," I tell him, "sometimes I make up really cool stories if people ask me about it."

"Really?" he laughs, "why didn't I get a cool story, then?"

"Wanted to tell you the truth," I shrug and say like a lame ass person.

Oh my gosh, Gabriella. Why did you say that? That was so cheesy. And so... lame. There was no real reason behind why I told him the truth just that it was truth. He asked, it came out and that was that. But now I'm making it seem like I want him to have my trust and blah blah blah. Ugh. Usually when I make up a story about my scar, it's because someone has said something about it or I'm using it as conversation, I don't know. I've only made up two stories about it to be honest so it wasn't this thing I did. I just told him that just to tell him and now I feel awkward. I shouldn't have said that.

"The truth's always good," is what he says back, though, and it doesn't make me feel as awkward or as lame anymore.

"Yeah, it is," I barely say back.

And now we're kind of just looking at each other and I feel like he's leaning in and it would be cray and cool if we just kissed casually right now in the middle of the beach, in the middle of the day. Like, it's our first time hanging out as more than friends? Well, outside that first official date. And I'm not sure we're at that casually kissing stage. I feel like we're still supposed to only kiss at the end of the day.

But we don't get to find out because Sasha comes in between us and drops her ball and gets us a bit wet.

"Sash," I laugh, grabbing the ball and throwing it back in the water.

"She's so cute," Troy comments, looking at her retrieve the ball, "just like you."

Oh God. I'm blushing. I know I am. It was said playfully, but still, every compliment he gives me makes me melt. Makes me want to just smile from ear to ear and go far away from him so I can scream. Just kidding... that's a little excessive, but it does make my heart skip a beat.

Before I could even say anything, he laughs, and gets up, "I'm gonna go play with her."

And off he went.

I watched him grab the ball from her and throw it deeper in the water so she could go and get it. While I sat here with a stupid smile on my face.

Have I mentioned how hot Troy Bolton is? Because he is. Really hot.

And I can't believe we're hanging out.


	12. Chapter 12

"No, no, it's fine, I can get it Friday," I tell Troy on the phone as I'm taking a seat on Sophia's bed, "okay, bye."

As soon as I hung up, Sophia raised an eyebrow at me. Which I expected. I mean, I came into her room on the phone with him AND he just dropped me off at her house. What could I possibly be on the phone with him about?

Well, I left my jacket in his car, but I don't really need it so I'll get it when I see him next.

"Can't get enough of each other?"

"No," I roll my eyes, slipping off my boots, "left something in his car and he wanted to know if I needed it so he can turn back."

Sophia laughed as she put her hair up in a messy bun. "How was dinner?"

Dinner was great. It's our third time hanging out and I want more. I want to keep hanging out with him. Which is why we're hanging out on Friday. He's busy tomorrow, I'm busy the next day and I don't think I want to hang out everyday. We'll probably get tired of each other. Except I can't imagine being tired of him because he's so funny and always has something to say and I just like talking to him. It's easy, it's good. But nah, we can hang out all the time.

"Delicious," I say, but I'm sure she didn't actually mean how the food was, "you know I'm a sucker for some good pizza."

"Can't believe you're actually like hanging out with a guy you're interested in," Soph laughs, taking off her sweatshirt and going over to her dresser, "what happened to not wanting a boyfriend or whatever?"

"I would hardly call this getting a boyfriend. It's early, I don't know what's going to happen."

Sophia grabbed an over size baseball shirt that belonged to her boyfriend and threw it over her tank top before turning back to face me. "But still, you like this guy and you're hanging out with him. Yo know what it could lead to and I don't think you're opposed to it. What's so great about this guy?"

That's what I'm still trying to figure out.

Because she's right. She's so right. A couple weeks ago, I wanted to have a fun summer, hook up with whoever- Parker was always there for that.

But now, it's just, like... I just jumped at the opportunity to hang out with him because he was by far the most attractive guy I've ever met. And then beyond that, he's nice and funny and I have a good time with him, conversation flows and everything just feels good.

There's chemistry there. I feel it when we kiss- there are sparks.

So, I've kinda pushed that out of my head and just focused on whatever made me happy, which is hanging out with him.

"It's weird talking about it because it's so early and I honestly don't know what's going to happen. All I know is that he asked me out, I said yes, we had a good time and now we're just hanging out, having fun. I really don't know, Soph."

"No more Parker?"

"I haven't talked to him," I shake my head.

Sophia came over and jumped on her bed and grabbed her phone from her nightstand. Her parents were out of town so I was staying over so she wouldn't be by herself. And I didn't mind. She had the most comfortable bed, ever. Plus, what are best friends for?

She put her phone down and looked up at me with a smile on her face. "So you're done with Parker, but what if he's still hooking up with other girls?"

Oh shit. I haven't thought about that. He very well could be.

And I don't think I have a right to be mad or anything like that, right? Right.

"I just can't bring myself to hook up with someone else when I'm interested in someone, you know?" I shrug, "like no, we're not official, but if I were to go and hook up with Parker on a random night or some other guy at a party, I would just feel really gross about it. And I don't really want to."

"So you like a guy," she smiles at me, "I think that's great. But I mean, could it work?"

"He's not leaving for college if that's what you're asking," I get off her bed and go over to her dresser and grab some pajama bottoms she's letting me borrow, "he's going to USC. Right around the corner."

Soph shakes her head, "nah, like, isn't Monica his aunt or something like that? Seems a little complicated."

Oh, that. Um, it could be. "Trying not to think about it. Haven't even told my dad I'm hanging out with him and I don't really care."

"You need to sit down and have a long, non-screaming talk with your father," she demands me, and as a best friend, I don't really feel annoyed by it because she's been through it all with me. "It's been so weird going over to your house and feeling awkward with your dad by associated. You guys NEVER used to argue or fight and I get it, but he's still your dad, Gabs. Don't you wanna be fine with him?"

"He just doesn't get it. He's too wrapped up in her and until then, I'm just sitting back. I apologized to him and that's more than enough right now."

Soph rolled her eyes and dropped it.

And then she turned on her TV and went through all the movie channels.

"Do you have any plans for next weekend?" Sophia broke the silence after a few minutes, "Kyle wants to go down to Orange County for the day, hang out at the beach, grab some really good seafood at that one place we went to, go to Balboa Island or whatever."

"Yeah, sure." Her boyfriends plan sounds great, actually. I love Orange County. "No plans. Who else is coming along?"

"Tor, Christine, probably the guys. We'll take two cars."

Sounds great. I love summer. I love my friends. And now I love... hanging out with Troy.

And I couldn't wait for Friday.

* * *

"I don't know CPR!" I tell Troy as he gets ready to dive into his pool.

He laughs, shakes his head and then dives...

And it's scaring the shit out of me. It's his second time and the first time, I don't know. I just feel like he's going to hit his head or inhale too much water or something. I don't know. I'm being paranoid. And I'll be over here, not knowing what to do. I can't even give him CPR because I don't know it.

He comes up out of the water and pushes his hair out of his face, "you try. I do know CPR if anything goes wrong."

"No way," I splash him a bit, "I don't even know the first thing about diving."

"It's easy," he shrugs as he starts floating around.

It was a pretty hot day today and the beach was probably packed so we decided to just go swimming. I offered my house because well, why not? But he told me to come over, we'll grab some food and go swimming. And so, that's exactly what we're doing.

We haven't ate yet. We decided to swim first. But I'm getting pretty hungry so hopefully we'll get out and eat something soon.

"Pass," I tell him as I dip my head back in the water to wet my hair.

"What are you doing tonight?" He asks me, coming closer with water dripping down his face. But he still looks so fucking hot, it's unbelievable.

Hmm what am I doing tonight? I know I have plans. Oh right. Fuck. My friends birthday dinner. How could that skip my mind? Well, obviously because I'm hanging out with him and all I can think about when I'm around him is how good looking he is. "My friend's having a birthday dinner."

He nods as he brings his hand up to his face to remove the water. "I would hate to have a summer birthday."

"Really, why?"

"I don't know, people are vacationing, they're all over the place. Hard to celebrate."

"Oh, yeah, I guess." He's right, actually. A couple friends she invited can't go tonight because they're out of town. Then, I realized that I didn't know his birthday. We've talked about so much already, but I don't know simple things. Like his birthday. "When's your birthday?"

He chuckled a bit, maybe having the same thought as me. "I have an early birthday. November 18th."

I did, too! Oh my gosh. And same date. "December 18th."

"Really, the 18th?" he laughs.

"Yeah, the 18th," I repeat, with a smile, "I love having a Winter birthday. Sure, it's close to Christmas, but I just love Winter so much."

"I know, people usually say they would hate to have birthdays near holidays, but it's not that bad," he agrees.

I'm not sure what else I said, but before I knew it, I had my arms wrapped around his neck and we were kissing. In his pool. In the middle of the day. I'm not sure what this is, I'm not sure if he's seeing other girls, I'm not sure if it's going to go anywhere or if it's just casual, but right now, I like it. And I don't really want to change anything about it because it feels good and makes me giddy and happy.

And I like Troy Bolton. I really do. And that kind of scares me a bit.

Troy moves his lips from mine and gives me a kiss on the neck and then puts them back on my lips, where he mumbles against them. "Race ya."

I deepen the kiss for a moment and then move my lips to his cheek, and then his ear. "You're gonna lose."

He grabbed my waist ever so lightly, but it still made me giggle because I'm ticklish and as I was about to swim to the end of the pool, he pulled me back and gave me one last kiss and that made me giggle as well, for some reason. Not in an annoying way, I don't think, which was good.

But then we heard someone cough.

And we pulled apart almost immediately.

It was Monica. Monica, my dad's girlfriend, was standing there.

Fuuuuuuck.

I fixed my hair a bit, I'm not really sure why. Troy looked at her, then turned to me and then looked back at her. And she was just standing there removing her glasses from her face and putting them on the top of her head. She was dressed casually. And you know what? She has really cute style, I can tell you that much. But she was just standing there, and I think she didn't know what was going on.

And neither did I, if I'm being honest. I... I didn't know she was coming. And I have no idea if she knows about us or not.

"Hey," Troy calls out to her, "um, what're you doing here?"

"Sorry," she says, "I just... I was dropping something off for your mom, no one answered so I used my key."

"What're you dropping off?"

She came a bit closer to us so she wouldn't have to yell. "This book. The other day, she was talking about wanting to try new recipes, some healthy recipes. And I was at the bookstore, came across it and thought I'd buy it for her."

Troy laughed, I'm not sure why. I don't know his mom well so maybe it was funny to him. "Oh, you're the sweetest."

I'm also not sure if he said that to patronize me, to discreetly tell me that Monica is really a sweet person or if it was just a natural reaction. Either way, I'm feeling a bit awkward. I don't know what Monica knows, I don't know anything. But I do know that I only ever see her when my dad's around and when he's around, I have a right to act bitchy and mad because of him. But I don't wanna do it in front of Troy.

"Sorry for interrupting," she says with a smile.

"You're leaving?" Troy asks, almost like he doesn't care if she stuck around. Uhhh...

"Yeah, yeah," she backs up a bit, "have to pick up Maddie from the Lyons and then we're gonna go shopping for um... stuff."

I know she wanted to say Hawaii. It's a few weeks away and I know that was probably it. And you know what? I feel kind of bad that she couldn't even say it. Did she not want to upset me? I don't know. I'm getting a weird feeling. And I just feel so fucking awkward right now.

Before I knew it, Monica was saying bye to us and walking away and Troy was now turned to me.

And I don't know what came over me, but I told Troy I'd be right back and I got out of the pool as fast as I could, grabbed my towel and headed inside.

Monica was still in here, grabbing her purse from the living room.

"Hey," I call out to her.

"Gabriella," she says, looking surprised.

I'm surprised, too. I don't really know what I'm doing. Maybe Monica's the issue. Maybe my dad's the issue. I have no idea, really. I just know that I should have never spoken to her the way I did and I really do feel awful about it. Did I mean the things I said? Yeah, maybe. But I don't know how she feels about everything, I don't know what my dad tells her when they're together. All I can base things off of is what I see, what I feel, what happens around me.

So I said those things to her and I do feel really bad about it. I need to apologize.

"I know this is weird," I start it off, "and I don't know... I'm not really sure... I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for what happened at the BBQ a few weeks ago. I shouldn't have yelled at you, especially in front of everyone at a BBQ you organized and I'm really sorry."

"Oh," she looked a little taken aback, but then a small smile appeared on her face, "it's okay. Your dad... he told me that was out of character for you and you know, to not... I just know your frustration and I'm sorry, too."

What did my dad tell her exactly?

Whatever, I didn't care to find out right now. I just wanted to tell her I'm sorry. As for what I said? The jury's still out on that one.

"You know what?" she says, leaning back on the back of the couch, "I get it. I know it's totally different for you, different situation, but my parents divorced when I was 14 years old and I HATED the guy my mom brought home. So you know, I get it. And I'm really sorry if I ever made things uncomfortable for you girls, that was never my intention. Your dad and I... it was just the right place at the right time. We had a connection and it went from there. He loves you girls more than anything in the world and I would never want to come in between that."

But you have, is what I want to say. I don't, obviously. I accept her apology and maybe things are looking up a little.

I mean, it seems like she gets it. And she seems sincere?

So why not? Why not just accept it and move on from it? But I'm not sure exactly she's the issue. Maybe it's my dad. My dad's the one I don't recognize anymore. Maybe it's not her that's changing him. Maybe he's changing himself. I don't know.

"Thank you," is all I really tell her with a smile. "Yeah, it's hard, but um, yeah, thank you and I... I just wanted to tell you I'm sorry."

"Okay," she smiles back at me as she turns around and grabs her purse once again, "and just between you and me, Troy's the best and I don't think he'd ever do anything to hurt you."

I wanted to smile so big, but I didn't want to come off as a creep.

Her saying that though, someone who knows Troy so well, kind of meant everything. And I was really happy to hear that.

"Thanks," I tell her before turning around.

And when I head outside, Troy's out of the pool already, just sitting at the table on his phone, looking hot. When he sees me come back out, he gets up. I'm not sure what he's thinking, but I think his face shows a little bit of worry.

He doesn't have to worry, though. I didn't yell at her this time. It went much better than last time.

"Nothing to worry about," I tell him with a laugh.

"Hey, I didn't say anything," he laughs, putting his phone down on the table.

I guess we were done swimming since he got out, but that was fine. We were in there for like half an hour. I was pretty much over it and I was getting hungry so whatever. Troy grabbed his shirt that was hanging on the chair and threw it on while I grabbed my dress that was there and put it over my bathing suit. It was going to get wet, but whatever, it was black, no big deal.

And then we headed inside and Monica was gone and it was just the two of us again, which is the way I prefer.

"Is this your natural hair?"

"What?" I turn around, registering his question. "Oh, yeah, it's.. curly. Not too curly, but curly."

"Yeah," he grabs a piece, "I like it."

Fuck. That made me blush for some reason. I'm telling ya, every compliment makes me blush and it's so fucking embarrassing. I'm not sure he can tell that I'm blushing, but I can tell and it makes me even more embarrassed. "Thank you."

He laughs and then leans down and gives me a kiss. "Hungry?"

"Starving," I tell him.

I love this. I love hanging out with him. I love how we're kissing whenever we want to kiss.

And I love how Monica said he would never hurt me.

Things are actually looking up.


	13. Chapter 13

"Wait, you missed your turn," I tell Troy as we're driving to lunch.

"I know," he comes to a stop at the red light and glances over at me, "I have to drop something off at Monica's."

Oh. Um. Okay. Yeah, I... well, ugh, I can't really say anything about that, can I? He's driving. And maybe he thinks it's okay because I apologized but it's not like I want to keep seeing her and shit. I see enough of her at my house. I saw her yesterday, but I was on my way so it was whatever. A small smile and a hello and then I was out the door to wherever I was going.

But I really hope he doesn't expect me to get down with him and say hi or something.

Because it's just awkward and shit.

"You don't even have to get out," he says as if he's reading my mind, "it'll be really fast and then we can go."

"Yeah, that's fine." I mean, what else can I say?

Two minutes later, we were in the Holmby Hills neighborhood, a neighborhood I actually used to live in, and we were driving past all these beautiful houses and I was really confused because I thought she lived in an apartment in Westwood. I swear that's where she lives. Her and Maddie.

But I guess not, because Troy's pulling up to this beautiful two story home that is surrounded by construction trucks and a huge trash bin in front.

"A bit hectic since she's still working on her house," he says, "construction for days."

"I thought she lived in Westwood?" I ask, confused by everything. Literally, I am SO confused. "In an apartment with Maddie."

I hope it didn't come out weird. Am I surprised she lives here? Sure, because the house is GORGEOUS and looks... expensive. Like, how much can a stylist make? Is she living off divorce money? I don't get it. But I definitely don't want Troy to think that I would think a single mother is poor. No way. There are some beautiful apartments out there, New York, that cost a fortune. I just... I don't know. I may have had a tainted perception of her because of everything and the fact that my dad would always buy her gifts, well, that didn't sit well with me. But I mean...

Her house. Clearly, she's not struggling. And clearly, she's not a gold digger.

Right?

"While her house was under construction," he nods.

"Sorry, I was just really confused for a minute," I say, and sit back, "I guess I don't know much about her."

Troy turned off his car and took off his seat belt and looked over at me and just gave me a small laugh. "Let me guess, one of the reasons you don't like her is because you think she's a gold digging single mother who doesn't really love your dad?"

I mean, that may have come to mind, but everything else that I was mad at clouded it and I didn't think about it AS much. But it was still a thought.

"No," I say, but I know I'm lying, "I mean, can you really blame me?"

"Guess not," he says, not looking upset with me at all. "She's a celebrity stylist. To A-listers. You know those dresses people are wearing to the Grammy's or the Oscar's? Yeah, she styled them, most likely. She's fine on her own and doesn't need money from anyone. She's been doing it for close to 13 years now."

"Well, now I just feel like a bitch," I feel like sinking in my seat and covering myself with a blanket, "I didn't know."

Troy laughed, "maybe because you haven't given her a chance. I'm not just saying this because she's basically my aunt, but Monica is one of the nicest people. And I know we don't talk about it, but I promise you, she'll never intentionally hurt your dad."

That's what she said about you to me, I think.

But I obviously don't tell him that. Instead, I just smile. "I could maybe lighten up."

"I'll be right back," he says after giving me a smile.

He gets out, grabs the package he's dropping off for her,knocks on the door, Monica opens it and motions him in. And less than a minute later, he comes right back out. And Monica's standing there, watching him leave. And we lock eyes with each other and for the first time since I've known her, I gave her one of my genuine smiles without it being provoked, without her complimenting me, without anything. Just because I wanted to.

And while we're driving to lunch, I get on my phone and google Monica for the first time since I've known her.

Monica Cruz.

Many, many links pop up.

I'm not really into celebrity gossip. I mean, I read magazines, but beyond that, I don't care.

So it's not weird that I didn't know she was a big time stylist. I honestly thought she was just a personal stylist for some rich socialite, like a Beverly Hills housewife or something that needs help with their shopping. I didn't know that she's dressed Jennifer Garner and Jessica Alba and all these different people.

I didn't know that she was voted Hollywood's number one stylist in 2013.

Or that she's basically like a celebrity in her own right, landing interviews, magazine covers for when she won that title, and is just very known in the fashion world, in Hollywood, and people actually have things to say about her. I didn't know any of this.

And it's taking me by surprise.

It's different and weird, but kinda cool. I mean, she doesn't need my dad's money. She's with him because she likes him. And that obviously makes my heart happy for him. And you know what? I'm lightening up.

Maybe I don't know anything. Maybe I have everything wrong. And maybe, just maybe, I can give Monica a chance.

She's the real deal in the styling word and that's probably why she has such cute clothes.

Monica is an accomplished business woman who people in the business go to when they need to go to events, when they want a whole new wardrobe for their life, and everything to do with fashion. She has an impressive client list and she knows what she's doing. She moved to LA when she was 18, went to school in Irvine and then moved to Los Angeles to pursue a fashion career and well, she's made it. She's at the top. Everyone wants her and everyone needs her.

At least that's what all these articles said and I had absolutely no idea.

But now that I do... I can take it easy on her, in regards to thinking she's using my dad for money or whatever.

In everything else? Well, I can't take it that far yet.

But I think it's slowly getting better.

* * *

"Dad, I'm going out," I tell him, "I'll be home probably by 11, no later than 12."

"Wait," he calls out to me as I'm turning to leave his office.

The rule is I always gotta tell him where I'm going. If I'm at a friends house and I decide to get pinkberry, no, obviously, I don't. That's ridiculous. But I just have to shoot him a text if I'm going from Malibu to Thousand Oaks or something like that. But he doesn't have to know who I'm with, what exactly I'm doing at all times or anything like that. He just wants to know my location because he's an overprotective father who worries about his kids.

I groan to myself and then turn around with a small smile. "Yes?"

"Where are you going?"

"I'm just going to dinner and a movie."

"Dinner and a movie?" he asks, pushing himself back from his desk, "are you dating someone?"

Troy and I have been hanging out for a couple weeks now and whenever we hang out, I just say I'm hanging with a friend or friends or whatever. Technically, I'm not lying. I just never wanted to tell him because I don't know what this really is yet. We're still just hanging out.

But obviously he knows. Monica knows, he knows, and he's just playing dumb.

"Oh whatever, dad," I say with a laugh, "you know..."

"How would I know? You haven't told me? It sounds like you are, though. Always going out..." He answers me and that's exactly how I know he knows.

I roll my eyes and take a seat in the chair he has in front of his desk, like he's at an actual agency or something. So official. "Monica..."

He looks taken aback. "Monica?"

"Yes, Monica, she knows, you know, it's not a secret anymore."

"Monica knows who you're dating? Are you serious?" The look on his face is a look I know well. He's telling the truth. He doesn't know who I'm dating. And I'm honestly so surprised. Monica knows about Troy and I. She's known for like a week now. And this is the first time my dad has stopped to ask about it, so it's really the only chance I've gotten to talk to him about it. "You told her? When?"

"No, I didn't, I..." I'm still SO confused. "Are you playing dumb, dad? Did she actually not tell you when she found out?"

He shook his head and leaned forward in his chair. "No, Gabriella, Monica didn't tell me. Who are you dating? And why does she know and I don't?"

Oh wow. I don't really know what to think. Why wouldn't she tell him? I mean, she has this information. Why didn't she come home and tell her that I'm basically hanging out with her nephew and dating him? I know for a fact she knew my dad didn't know and she was the one who discovered it, because Troy's parents didn't even know. We kind of talked about it that night that he hadn't really told his parents, and I hadn't told my dad but the secret was out and yep, Troy's parents now know. And so I thought for sure my dad did, too. And he just hadn't brought it up to me because there hasn't been a chance to.

But seriously, he doesn't know?

"Dad, it's Troy," I tell him, "I've been hanging out with Troy."

"Troy Bolton," he says, just looking at me for a moment, "you're dating Troy Bolton?"

Why does he keep saying his full name? It's kind of freaking me out. "Are you serious? You really did not know? Monica saw me and him the other day at his house. Surely, she came back and told you."

He shook his head, "no, she didn't. She didn't tell me anything. And I was trying to figure it out yesterday, too! When I heard you on the phone."

"And she actually didn't tell you?" I feel like he's playing dumb, maybe thinking I'd be mad, but I can't be. It's not like it's this BIG secret we wanted to keep. It was an unintentional secret. We just didn't tell anyone, but I guess we don't care who knows. "Why not?

"Well, believe it or not, Monica is a sweetheart and she probably felt like it wasn't her business to tell," he says with a small smile.

I guess that's... pretty cool.

It's not like it wasn't something I wanted my dad to know, it would have just been nice if he heard it from me, you know?

And he did. He did hear it from me... just now.

"How come you never told me Monica was like rich and successful?" I change the subject, sort of, we're still talking about Monica, but it doesn't involve me anymore. "I mean, she dresses uber A-listers for a living. I saw her house today."

"I mean, it's not really my place to discuss her finances," he tells me with a raised eyebrow, "and why does it even matter if she is or not?"

"Because here I was thinking she might be a gold digger, dad!" I have no reason to be angry at him for it, it's really just me. I shouldn't have judged her whatsoever like that. "You're giving her presents, she has a daughter, it was just typical behavior you see in movies and shit about gold diggers."

He looked at me like he couldn't believe what I was saying.

But then he let out a small laugh. "Maybe I knew that could have been a thought in your mind, but I knew the truth."

"Yeah, so why didn't you put my mind at ease?" I ask him, "that would have been nice."

"I don't know, Gabriella," he says and then gets up. I think he wants to get out of his office, so I get up too. And we both walk out. And head to the kitchen where he grabs a water bottle from the fridge. "I'm sorry? I just didn't think her finances were any of her business and you never wanted to hear anything about her. I've told you she's a stylist..."

"I just didn't know she was this mega stylist," I shrug, "it's honestly not a big deal, I just now feel bad I thought she was a gold digger."

My dad smiled at me. I don't know if I was coming around, but I was letting go just a little bit.

And I know he's excited about that. I know he can sense it in my voice.

"Well, she's not. She does more than fine on her own and she's in this relationship for nothing other than just me," he tells me and it still feels weird to hear him talk like this. Gahhhh. I just wish things were the way they used to be. "I think Hawaii is going to be a great trip."

Right. Hawaii. Fuuuuck.

In a week and a half, we're off to Hawaii. Jess, my dad, me, Monica and little Maddie.

"Hawaii," I say, fake enthusiasm and all, "can't wait."

I can wait, though. I really, really can.


	14. Chapter 14

"I gotta hear from Lyla Grant that you're dating some guy... come on, Gabriella!"

"Parker, we're not talking about this."

He blocked me from walking outside and the look in his eyes, I mean, I feel bad. I think there was more there than he lead on and I never intentionally want to hurt someone, but I thought we were on the same page. I didn't know that I had to have this big talk with him when this was all over with.

So I soften up and give him what he wants. A talk. "Look, I'm sorry. I met him and things... clicked."

"Oh, and they didn't click with us?" He looks offended.

"Parker, you can barely keep it in your pants," now I'm REALLY offending him, "you and I both know it never would have worked out. I'm not like other girls and honestly, I thought we were on the same page. But I'm sorry, I really am."

"You never let me prove it to you," he tells me, looking around, making sure no one heard him. He was probably embarrassed.

I do feel bad. But Troy, I like him. I like hanging out with him. We have a connection that's more than just physical. And that didn't happen with Parker. It's not something you can force and I don't really know how else to tell him that. "I'm sorry."

He kind of rolled his eyes, trying not to look me in the eyes.

Parker Fels was nice and he was funny and I can always count on him to have a good time. But there was nothing there. His parents are so rich, he feels like he doesn't have to do anything with his life. He's good looking, he thinks he doesn't have to work to get girls. And that's just not the kind of guy I want, to be honest. So, it never would have worked.

And I knew that from the beginning, but I'm not sure he did. I should have been more open with him about it.

"I really am sorry," I grab his hand, "you're just upset because of this attitude that you think you can get whatever you want and when it doesn't happen, it makes you a bit crazy. You'll realize it soon, maybe even tomorrow, that you really don't have these feelings for me. And on to the next girl, like always..."

"Don't make me sound like I'm incapable of falling in love or ever having a girlfriend."

He's right. I shouldn't say anything like that to him. It's rude.

Maybe Parker Fels is capable of having a girlfriend, I'm just not it. I'm not the one that's going to make him want to settle down.

"You're right, I shouldn't say anything like that," I tell him my thoughts, "but I am sorry. I'm sorry I cut you off like I did. It wasn't cool... at all."

His face softened up a bit and Parker and I... we have a weird friendship/relationship. I don't think I could ever be mad at him and vice versa. "We agreed to not be anything serious and maybe you're right, I just can't stand things going my way, so I'm I hope this guy treats you right."

I hope so, too.

I like hanging out with Troy Bolton and I want to keep hanging out with him.

But so far, so good. I mean, I'm happy.

"Thanks, Park," I give him a smile before I go find my friends.

So glad that's over with.

* * *

"You've never been here?" Troy almost looks shocked, but I mean, there are SO many food places in LA. "Really?"

"Really," I say, as I look out at the ocean. It's so beautiful.

"It's one of my favorites, the view alone is amazing," he grabs the iced tea he orders that comes in a little mason jar. It's actually the cutest thing. I've heard of this place, for sure. But I just never ate here or made the trip out to Malibu specifically for this place. "don't worry, the food's good, too."

I laugh and also take a sip of my drink, a lemonade. "I've heard good things."

He nodded as we made eye contact with each other instead of looking at the water, "excited for Hawaii?"

Hawaii.

Tomorrow, I leave for Hawaii.

For 5 days, four nights with my dad's girlfriend and his daughter.

"I love Hawaii," I choose my words carefully.

I'm getting a little better with the whole Monica thing, I feel like I can talk to her a bit now and my dad seems to kind of get my frustration so that's good. And the fact that she didn't tell my dad about Troy and I, well, that gave her some bonus points. So, I'm not dreading it as much as I have been for the last couple weeks. I'll have my sister there. We can go explore or something. I've been there twice. And thank God none were with my mom or I'd freak out.

Troy laughed, though, picking up on it immediately. "I can't really say anything because I've never been in your position."

And that's what I like about him. He's close to Monica and we're hanging out, yet he's never tried to convince me to like Monica. He's never told me to give her a chance and blah blah blah. He just doesn't get involved. It's only about us.

"I'm sure it'll be fun," I try to make things a little better, "who doesn't have fun in Hawaii? I'm so lucky."

"I've never been," he shrugs.

"Oh," I say, like it's not big deal, "it's nice, I love it."

Our food comes out very shortly after talking about Hawaii, and I'm so excited because this sandwich I ordered looks SO freaking good.

And it was. It was one of the best sandwiches I think I've ever had.

It was a great little dinner. An early dinner. Great food, great view, great company.

But that ended rather quickly because it's not really a restaurant where you linger. It's casual and it's self seating and you order at a station and so we left the minute we were done eating and decided to just go back to my house because we didn't know what else to do.

My dad was at the restaurant and my sister was spending time with her boyfriend before we leave to Hawaii tomorrow so it was just Troy and I.

"Want something to drink?"

"I'm good," he shakes his head so instead of going to the kitchen, I lead him to the family room.

He's never really been at my house. Sure, my graduation party and another time when he dropped me off and came in for a bit, but other than that, he hasn't really hung out here. We usually hang out at his place or we go out somewhere and have dinner and then he just drops me off after.

So when he steps inside my front living room, he looks around the place a bit.

And I can see him eying a picture of my mom.

It was in the hospital room a day after she gave birth to my sister and she's getting ready to leave. She's sitting in the chair, carrying her. Her hair's in a messy little bun and she's smiling at the camera, per my dad's request. I'm off to the side, standing there giving my sister a kiss on the forehead, not realizing my dad was taking a picture or else I would have been looking. Because I was a camera whore. I LOVED having pictures taken, supposedly. But whatever. It's probably the best picture there is of my mom. And we all love it so much so it's front and center. And has been for as long as I can remember.

"What are you thinking?" I ask Troy.

"What?" He looks over at me and shakes his head, "oh, no, nothing."

I chuckle a bit and walk over to the picture and grab it and bring it back to where he is. I take a seat on the couch and he follows. "It was the day after she gave birth to Jess. Doesn't she just look so... content?"

He nodded, looking down at it, "that's exactly what I was thinking, actually. She looks so... fulfilled."

"That's the word she used when she described this picture, actually," I tell him, "she always said she would want two girls or two boys and if God gave her a third one, it wouldn't matter. So in that moment, she was happy I would have a best friend for life, someone who can go through everything with me because that's how she grew up. With her sister. Two brothers, too, but they were the best of friends and that's what she wanted."

"It's not... hard? Having all these pictures of her?" he motions around the living room.

There are a couple you can clearly see are her and a few more that you'll have to get a close look at, but yes, it's hard. It's so hard.

I get up and go to put the picture away. "For sure it's hard. But she's our mom and we want her around."

"I'm sorry," he apologizes.

"What're you sorry for?" I turn around.

"I don't know," he shrugs, "it's not this giant elephant or anything, I just... we've never really talked about your mom and I don't think I've ever really told you that I'm sorry that' she's, you know, not here and stuff."

I appreciate it, but people don't need to feel sorry for me. Millions of kids have it worse than I do. "You know, there are people in China whose mom has to give them up if they have a birth defect or some sort of illness, they just leave them there. Some people have no parents- no more or dad. And there are people who are born and the mom or dad are just horrible people. I think those are the people you need to feel sorry for."

Troy looked at me, not saying anything for a moment, and then gave me a small smile. "No, I know you have it better than other people out there, but still, she was your mom and she's not here anymore and that's sad. But you're right."

"I miss her every day of my life, but I'm a strong believer in everything happens for a reason so, maybe it's better this way, I don't know."

"What was she like?" he asks me.

This question kind of makes me stop, even though I'm just sitting here next to him now.

He wants to know about my mom? He's asking me about her?

We haven't talked about what this is. We're hanging out, making out, getting to know each other. I'd say we're dating. But I have no idea if he's dating other girls. What Monica said to me about him not hurting me makes me think no, but maybe she just meant if we were to get in a relationship. Right now, he's technically single, so yeah, I can't be mad at him for it. I'd be bummed because he's the only guy I'm hanging out with.

But I just feel like it's something more. It's not as casual as one would think.

And him asking me about my mom, something personal and meaningful to me, well, maybe it's not so casual.

"You know how when people die they have nothing but good things to say about the person?" I ask him, "sometimes it's bullshit, sometimes it's not. It's not bullshit here just because she's no longer here. She was the kindest woman on Earth."

"What did she do?"

"She was an event planner. Weddings, divorce parties, everything."

Troy laughed, probably at the divorce parties, but it's a real thing here in Los Angeles. "Did she love it?"

She loved it almost as much as she loved us. It was her second child. The rush she got from making someone's day perfect is what my mom was all about and why so many people loved her. "Oh, yeah. She was so good. She was so good at knowing exactly what the person wanted, adding little details that would make it special for them. She thrived. She got such a rush from making their day special. She was so good at what she did."

"Tell me more," he says and it makes me smile but at the same time, scares me a little bit.

It this getting real? Is it getting serious?

I'm not sure, but I don't think I mind because I like hanging out with him. And talking to him is SO fucking easy.

So I tell him more. "I don't know, I know I'm bias but she was just the best mom. She had this crazy career, running around town all day, yet she still was in that carpool line at school, waiting to pick us up. She was just the mom that was always there, no matter what. The second I said I wasn't feeling well, she would start to boil water for a tea. Whenever I had a field trip, she'd volunteer to go before I would even express interest in her going. She was just always so present. We were her number one priority always and growing up, knowing that you have that, I mean, what else could you possibly ask for?"

"Not much," he smiles, turning towards me more and putting his hand over the back of the couch, "maybe if she sucked a bit, it would be easier to accept a new woman in your dad's life, huh?"

"Probably," I laugh, knowing he's just trying to make light of it. "you know, I'm not even sure it's Monica specifically because to be honest, I don't know much about her. It's just so hard when for so long, you've only ever seen your parents together... happy."

Troy gave me a weak smile, like he got it. But of course, he loves Monica, so I get it.

And that's the thing with us... I think we just get each other.

I feel like he gets me in a way so many guys wouldn't. And I have no idea how to explain it, I just feel it. Which is crazy because it hasn't been long.

But I feel like I can tell him things, like I can talk to him about anything and everything. And it's SO crazy that he's making me feel this way in such a short amount of time. It seems almost impossible, really, yet here I am... feelings things for him. And hoping he feels them for me, too.

"I'm sure your mom is so proud of you and I'm sure she was as great as you say," he tells me, "I mean, she made you."

"Yeah," I try to hold back tears, but it's almost impossible.

That's the only thing I want in life... for people to compaer me to my mom. And have it be a positive thing. Because she was kind. She was brave. She was compassionate. She was a go getter. She was happy. She was loving. She was understanding. She was accepting. She was every beautiful thing in this world. She was beautiful. And for people to think she did a good job on me and my sister, it's everything.

Troy just stared at me for a moment, and then he brought his hand up to my face and gently wiped away the tear that was now falling.

If I think about my mom for too long, I start crying.

But he wiped away the tear for me, and then kissed me like he meant it.

I'm so content right now.


	15. Chapter 15

Hawaii's so beautiful and I love it.

But obviously, I wish I was here with different people.

My sister? For sure. My dad? Eh, I guess. Love him despite everything. Monica and her daughter? I mean, not ideal. It's not ideal to be spending a vacation with your dad's girlfriend and her child. It just makes everything all the more real, you know?

That's how it has been lately and how it is... real. Their relationship is real and I can't really fight it anymore.

So, like my grandma said before coming on this trip, I have to do my best to embrace it and to make an effort no matter how hard it is.

And right now's the perfect time to do that because my dad is currently playing golf with a friend he has out here and my sister and Maddie are in the pool swimming around so it's me and Monica here, chilling by the pool.

It's a tad bit awkward since we're not saying much, so why not get to know her a bit? I've realized that my dad has genuine feelings for her and I don't think that's going to change anytime soon so maybe I should just try to get to know her, at least be able to talk to her when I am around her, you know?

"I'm not sure if it'll ever be the two of us on this trip again, so I just wanted to tell you something..."

"Oh," I'm surprised Monica started a conversation as soon as I was going to. But I was just going to ask where she got her sandals. HA. "Yeah?"

She turned a bit in her chair, took her glasses off and put them on top of her head and then gave me a small smile. I have no idea what she's about to tell me, but she looks a bit nervous. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry about everything."

About my mom dying? Yeah, everyone's sorry. The amount of people that have told me is a tad ridiculous. But she's said this to me before. "It's okay."

"No," she shakes her head, "I'm sorry about how I've acted."

"What?" I'm a little surprised, because I always felt like she thought she was doing nothing wrong at all.

"A few weeks ago when you said what you said at the BBQ, it brought me back down," she starts telling me, "and yes, I was upset and everything, but you were right. You were so right about everything you said. The way I came in, the way it must have looked to you girls... it wasn't right. I was just so caught up in the way your dad was making me feel, this great guy, who I met and instantly clicked with. I'm not looking for sympathy but I didn't think I would be able to find someone so great and have genuine, deep feelings for and I did and I was so caught up in everything that I didn't take enough time to think about how you girls felt about it. Part of it was selfishness, but the bigger part of it was nerves. Knowing how great your mom was, I already imagined you girls not liking me so I think I just thought it might be easier to maybe not really try so there's no reason to not not like me, you know?If I tried and you still didn't like me, well, that would have been worse, I think. So I just wanted to say I'm really sorry about the way I went about things. I made it difficult, I made it awkward not just for you girls, but your dad. And the last thing I would ever want is to come between you guys. I don't want to hurt you girls... or your dad."

Oh wow. I... I didn't expect this.

But this is very nice of her. And in some crazy way, I get it. I get why she would act like that.

And it's not entirely her fault. I didn't really seem very inviting so if from the beginning I acted the way my mom taught me how to act, maybe all the weeks of awkwardness and wanting to avoid her would have not happened. But it is what is is and we can't change the past.

All we could do is move on from it and try to get to a place of understanding.

"It's okay," I sincerely mean it. My mom's not coming back. If my dad wants to date, he's going to date. I can't stop him there. So, I'm fine with it.

"And I don't expect things to just change. The easiest thing is probably to just, you know, walk away, but I don't think I can do that," she continues to tell me, "but I hope we can get to a place where things are good."

I hope we can, too.

For my dad. And I guess for me and my sister, too.

And I accept her apology, completely. "I'm sorry, too. It just... it was all too much at once and I've just never been in this position before so I didn't know how to act, what to do. I should have never said those things, I should have never made you feel like you weren't welcomed in my home and I'm sorry. If you make my dad happy, then that's all that matters, right? It's an adjustment, but I think we'll be okay."

"Yeah," she smiles at me, "I'm not here to step on anyone's toes, or replace anyone. I know how much you girls loved your mom and how much your dad loved her, too. And the last thing I would want is for you guys to think I deserve or act like I should be liked or anything like that."

"I'm sorry," I really wanted her to know that I am sorry. "Let's just move forward."

"Okay," she says and then she gets up and gives me a hug.

It's the first hug we've ever exchanged and I don't think it'll be the last one because this talk, as short as it was, cleared the air and opened up a path for us.

And I think things are going to get better.

* * *

"So how are you and Sean?"

"We're good," my sister smiles as she traces a heart in the sand.

I can't help but laugh at how cheesy she's being. But it's nice seeing her with a guy who likes and respects her as much as she does to him. They've been together about seven months and although it's been a whirlwind of a year, he's been there for her and I think that just intensified their relationship because he was there at such a crucial time. I'm sure he saw her cry, I'm sure he's seen her be the biggest pain in the butt, everything that comes with losing a loved one, especially if that person is your mom, you know?

Sean's a good guy. And he's so cute. I love them together. I don't know him THAT well, but I know enough. "Have you had sex with him?"

"Gabs," she rolls her eyes and spreads sand across the heart, covering it up, "what do you think?"

"I don't know!" I tell her, "you don't really talk to me about him, and I know you're terrified of getting pregnant in high school so you're abstaining, but you also really like him, you love him, so..."

"It hasn't been the best year for us," she reminds me and I just don't want to go back there. We didn't talk like sisters should and I hate that because we needed each other more than ever at the time. "But um, we're not having sex, but I think I want to. Is that bad?"

I take my sunglasses off and put them on top of my head as she turns to face me. "Yeah, you want to?"

She shrugs, "I mean, I love him. I know I love him. And I think I'm ready."

"Mom would so want you to be married first," I laugh, but she knew that was probably impossible. She wasn't even married when her and my dad first had sex, but that's too much info right now. "But really, you think you're ready? You know that once you guys do it, he's not going to dip out or anything?"

"Gabs," she almost looks offended that I would think that. "Sean's not like that. And he has never once pressured me."

"Well that's good." I'm in protective older sister mode now and I never want my sister to be hurt over a guy. "I just don't want you to regret it.

Jess pushes herself up off the sand and turns to me. "I won't."

I believe her. I think she's truly in love with Sean and he's a really good guy who loves her just as much.

But as an older sister, you just worry. I mean, I'm a virgin. I've made out with countless of guys. Okay, not countless, but a good amount for a girl. I've never had a serious boyfriend so the opportunity never presented itself. I want to be in love when it happens. I want to know that it's not all they want and that they're not going to leave the second they get it. And I want that for my sister, too.

"I trust you," I tell her, "you'll be fine."

"And so will you," she says with a smile, "how are things with Troy?"

"Good," I shrug, "I mean, it's not like we're boyfriend and girlfriend so how can it really be? It is what is it, we're just hanging out right now, but it's been fun. I enjoy his company, I think he enjoys mine. And I guess we'll just see where things go, you know?"

She nods, like get gets it. I don't wanna act like we're together. "But do you see it? Can you see him actually being your boyfriend?"

Yes. And that's scary to admit or think about.

Because a couple months ago, a boyfriend is the last thing I wanted. It's the last thing I thought I needed.

But hanging out with him has been so much fun, and I just don't think I want to stop just yet. So if that means this whole thing will turn into a relationship, well, that's just something I'm going to deal with. I also know that I don't want to casually hang out with a guy I really like. Nah, that only worked with Parker because there weren't romantic feelings there. With Troy, I can't be casual. So if he doesn't see me being his girlfriend, he has to let me know soon.

"He has all the qualities I would like in a boyfriend, so yeah, sure."

"Do you trust him?"

"Trust takes time, Jess," I roll my eyes.

She nods, "okay, fair enough. Would you feel weird if he was at a party while you're here? And he's over there talking to girls?"

Ugh. Why did she have to bring this up. I'm trying to act like a sane person, a person who wouldn't get mad over the guy they're hanging out with being at some party without her because they're not even together. "I couldn't get mad. We're not official."

"But you would?" she presses me, "it's okay if you would. It's normal. I wouldn't want the guy I'm hanging out with to be at parties talking to girls."

"Obviously, I wouldn't care for that, but we're not really anything Jess, it'd be SO silly for me to get upset."

"I hope he's not," she says, "it's the first guy I think you've actually taken a liking to and it would suck if the minute you left town, he went to some parties and flirted with girls. Yeah, technically, he's single, but it's kinda douchey."

She's right. I wouldn't be okay with it. But I just don't know if I could call him out on it if he were to go to some parties.

All I know is that I do like Troy Bolton.

And I want things to work.

* * *

"Oh, sorry," I say to Monica as I walk into the suite as she's laying on the couch.

"No, no,"she shakes her head, getting up, "I'm not sleeping."

That's what I was apologizing for. I thought she was sleeping and I was going to wake her up. I put my water bottle down on the table and peek into the room I'm sharing with Jess and I see her on the bed, sleeping and Maddie is next to her sleeping as well.

I just came back from getting the best facial of my life. No one wanted one so I just went by myself while they went to the beach.

"Where's my dad?"

"He's sleeping, too," she says, pulling her hair back into a ponytail.

I've thought some horrible things about Monica, but that's all behind me now. I actually do think she's a nice person, a great mother, and... really pretty. She's gorgeous. My frustration and hatred just stemmed from it being too soon, my dad looking like he didn't care about our needs, and her not trying to get to know us at all. But these past couple of days, things seem to be getting better. It's only our third day here, we have two more, but so far, so good.

I could go for a nap right now, too, but I know we have dinner reservations in an hour so it'd be pointless to sleep.

"You're not tired?" I ask her, grabbing my water bottle to refill it with water from the fridge.

"A bit, but we have reservations soon."

Yeah, exactly what I was thinking. We can't take naps now.

After I refill my water, I grab a magazine from the table and take a seat on the sofa chair diagonal from Monica. She's reading her own book so why not join her? I'm not going to go in my room and wake them up and I'm not going to walk out because that's rude and I'm done being rude to her.

So now, it's just us two here and it's slightly awkward, but it's getting better.

"How was your facial?"

"Amazing," I smile, grabbing my face, "you have to get one before we leave... if you like facials."

"I do, but they sometimes make me breakout, which is so ironic."

I laugh, "yeah, that happened with my mom so she never really got them. But I love them. It's just so relaxing and makes you feel so brand new."

She didn't really say much else, she just smiled and went back to flipping through her cooking magazine. I learned on this trip that she LOVES to cook so that's cool, I guess. And I went back to flipping through this People magazine. And a few pages in and I couldn't help, but think about how crazy this all is. There, on page 7, was Monica Cruz with Jessica Alba at a party for the Honest Company. In fine print at the bottom it said, Jessica Alba stuns in Victoria Beckham as she poses along the woman responsible for it, her stylist Monica Cruz.

Monica was in this People magazine and she was sitting right in front of me, reading a magazine. I mean... how crazy?! I don't typically read gossip magazines. I only ever pick them up if I'm in the hair salon, waiting at the doctor's, on a plane going somewhere, things like that.

So, this is pretty much the first time I've seen her in this.

"This is a nice picture of you two," I tell Monica as I hold up the magazine so she could see.

"Oh God," she laughs, shaking her head, "Jessica forced me to take it."

I didn't say much else. I flipped through the magazine some more and once I was done with it, I threw it on the table in front of me and decided to make conversation with her. It's the least I could do and you know what? Things between my dad and Monica only seem to be getting better so I have to accept the fact that she's going to be around and try to make it positive or whatever, so why not get to know her a bit?

Which is exactly what I'm going to do right now.

"How'd you get into stylist?"

"What?" she kind of looks surprised that I'm asking her a question about herself. Ha. But she immediately gets over that and answers me. "Oh, um, I don't know. From an early age, I just loved putting together outfits. I used to always dress up my cousins, sisters, tell them what looks good on them."

"And so, you went to school for fashion?" I wonder. "FIDM?"

She nods, "yeah, I was going to college up north and it just wasn't for me. My passion was fashion so I transferred. A year in, I got an internship with Stella McCartney and it kind of just happened from there. I don't really have that great of a story."

I laugh. I wasn't expecting this rags to riches story, but I just wondered why. "Do you still really love it?"

"Oh yeah," she grabs her juice from the table, "making someone feel beautiful and comfortable in what they're wearing feels so good."

"Do you ever want to design your own line?"

"It's something that's come up," she says, "yeah, sure, but right now, I'm so happy with just styling people. Picking out dresses for them, shoes, jewelry. Maddie thinks it's the coolest job in the world, so I don't think I can ever stop."

That's cute. Maddie is the cutest, sweetest little girl. For real.

And I'm sitting here, realizing Monica is not that bad. She's cool to talk to. She's nice. She's engaging. And I feel awful about being so rude to her.

After conversation died down about her job, I decided to thank her for something I never got a chance to. "Hey, I never got the chance to thank you about not telling my dad about you know, Troy and I... it's not that I was keeping it a secret, I just didn't really know what was going on yet."

"Oh, of course," she shakes her head as if it's no big deal, "it wasn't really my business to tell."

"Yeah, thanks," I smile at her, "I mean, he knows now but at the time, it was still sort of, I don't really know..."

She laughs, "and now it's more serious?"

Oh man. I don't know if I want to talk about this with her. But I'm not one that brought it up so I can't just shut it down and act like I don't want to talk about it at all. "No, I don't know. It's been more time, but who knows, really."

"Troy's a great guy. He has a lot going for him. And I know he really likes hanging out with you."

"I like hanging out with him, too," I confess to her as if she's my friend or something. It's weird. It kind of just feels... right. Like maybe I should be talking to her about this. "But you know, it's still early and I know it's summer and maybe he doesn't want to be tied down or anything."

"Oh, no," she shakes her head and my heart sinks for a minute, "Troy's never been a multiple woman kind of guy."

My heart is back up now. She didn't mean he didn't want to be tired down or anything.

She was assuring me of the opposite. But what if she's just trying to make him look better?

I don't think she is, though. I feel it. I think Troy's a good guy and especially in this situation, the situation we're in of his aunt dating my dad, it could get tricky and I think he's smart enough that if this wasn't to work out, it should end on good terms. He's just a nice guy and I want to keep hanging out with him and I'm glad Monica's giving me a little inside scoop because it's making me feel better about everything.

"Thanks," I tell her, "if he wanted to date other girls, he could, we're not technically together, but it's nice knowing he's not like that."

"Like I told you," she says, "I don't think Troy would ever hurt you."

And just like that, I think everything become better.

I think I approve of Monica.


	16. Chapter 16

"Can I talk to you?"

Ugh these words are never good. "Sure, what's up?"

My dad made his way into my room and sat at the bench that was at the end of my bed. I'm not sure what he has to say, but it doesn't look light.

He looked around my room like much has changed, and it kind of has because I get bored easily so I rearrange things and buy new things, and then turned back to me and gave me a small smile. "I just wanted to tell you that Hawaii was a lot of fun and I'm really happy with the way things turned out. I know that Monica and Maddie had a really good time."

"Oh," I'm a little taken aback by what he said. I thought it was something serious. "No, yeah, we had fun, too."

"I'm going to tell you something and it's up to you to believe it or not."

Whaaaaat? what does that even mean!? "Okay..."

My dad took a deep breath and looked right at me. "A year before your mom died, when we went to New York for a little weekend getaway, we decided to update our will because you never know. We wanted to be on the safe side. And that night, while we decided everything, we got to talking... serious talking about what will happen if something happened us. How would we deal with it and so on. We talked about it all. And when I told her I wouldn't remarry and she laughed in my face and told me I better. I thought it was crazy. If something were to happen to me, I'm not sure I'd want her to remarry at all."

He wouldn't want to remarry? Then why the fuck is he dating Monica and why does it seem serious?!

"I don't really get it."

"Yeah," he chuckled, "it's what I said, but she was so adamant about me moving on with my life if something were to happen to her. She didn't care that you girls were passed the formative years, she thinks a girl should always have a mother figure and so, she told me to date after her."

My mom was cool like that so I could see her saying that.

And in the back of my mind, if my dad and mom every divorced, I know he'd go crazy if she started dating again.

So that's why this was so crazy to me. Him dating Monica SO soon after.

"When I met Monica at that Christmas party and we got to talking, it was easy and it felt nice and something just clicked between us," he chuckled, "but you know, a couple of dates in, she asked what my status was divorced, never been married and I wasn't going to lie to her. When she found out my wife had only died a year before, she put the breaks on it. She thought it would be too complicated and she definitely did not want to come in and disrupt anything and she wasn't willing to put herself in a position that in maybe two months, I could say, you know what, I'm definitely not ready for another relationship..."

"Why are you telling me this dad?" I ask, confused by everything. I don't understand where he's going with this at all.

I get that maybe he wanted to tell me his reasoning, but now it's all about Monica.

So I'm confused.

He gave me a smile and nodded, "yeah, I'm just letting you know everything. I'll always love your mom and she will always be number one in my heart, but we can't change what's happening right now. She's not here. And she wants me to be happy with someone, to have that person who I can lie next to at night and I know you probably don't want to hear it, but Monica's great and she's not this evil person that you think she is or thought she was and that is why I've never really had your back and I'm so sorry for that.I should have. One hundred percent. I got caught up, but I knew she was a nice person who never had any intention of coming in here to try to take everything over. I'm the one that had to convince her. And I think we're all at a good place right now, but I've never had this talk with you. And I really am sorry for everything. The way I acted. Looking like I didn't care about you or your sister's needs."

"I know you care," I tell him because I really know he does, "it was just weird fora little while, but you're right, we are in a good place right now and if Monica makes you happy, then I'm happy."

My dad looks at me a little weirdly. I know, I know, he probably thought I had more to say.

But I'm over it. I'm over the fighting. I'm over the yelling. I know that he loved my mom more than anything and I know it's one hundred percent true that my mom would have wanted him to remarry. So I can't be mad. And Monica actually doesn't seem that bad. She's nice. She's successful. She's gorgeous. So, I'm okay with everything. And I think it'll be alright.

"I love you, kiddo," he gets up and comes over to the side of my bed to give me a kiss on the forehead.

"Love you, too, dad," I give him a smile.

Things are going to be okay.

* * *

"Are you doing anything tomorrow?" Troy asks me as we're having lunch.

"No," I shrug, nothing's coming to mind about anything I have going on, "why, what's up?"

He grabbed a chip from the basket in the middle of the table and drenched it in salsa before throwing it in his mouth. "I'm heading down to the OC, was wondering if you wanted to come with. We can make a day out of it. They have a good shopping center there."

I know they do, I've been a couple of times. "Why are you going?"

"My aunt lives there and she's out of town for the week, but she's expecting a package that needs to be signed for so I told her I'd do it."

"Oh." So he's going to be chilling at her house waiting for this package and once it's delivered, we can go about our day? Go shopping or whatever? That actually sounds like fun. And I love the OC. It'd be nice to get out of LA for a day. "ell, I don't have anything going on, so yeah, that sounds fun."

"Yeah?" He looks excited about it and it makes me get butterflies. "it's supposed to come between 11 and 3, I think."

Four hours of potentially waiting. Okay. "So let's leave here around 9? Just in case?"

He nods, "yeah, I think that should be fine."

I think it'll be fun. Getting away with him for the day. I mean, I know he's not crazy or dangerous so it should be fine. And fun. And I've been away for a week so getting to spend the whole day with him seems like paradise. This is the first time I'm seeing him since getting home from Hawaii two days ago and man, does he look good. He looks even better than I remember. And I love that we're still hanging out and he didn't get over me while I was over there.

"So how was Hawaii?"

"Fun," I say, honestly, "yeah, weather was perfect. The resort was beautiful. We had a lot of fun."

"Yeah, last night Maddie was telling me how much fun she had," he laughs, grabbing some more chips, "she looks so tan."

I laugh thinking about how much time Maddie spent outside. She ALWAYS wanted to be in the water. She definitely got a shade darker. "She's like a little fish. She loves swimming so much. Or just being in the water."

Troy nodded, of course he knows that. "Yeah, that girl can spend hours in a pool."

"Yeah," I give him a smile, grabbing some chips, "but it was fun. My sister and I ventured off for an afternoon and did some shopping."

"Maddie told me that too," he laughed, "she actually couldn't stop talking about how you and her walked around the hotel and you guys saw a flamingo or something like that. She said it was the best part of her trip and that you were so nice to her."

I'm not sure why I'm feeling so happy right now. I love Maddie. I really do.

And so the fact that she's talking about me in a positive way, to someone I like, feels so good. It makes me so happy.

Even though I wasn't a fan of Monica before, Maddie was never an issue. Maybe at the beginning when I didn't know her at all. But when I met her and saw how cute and charming she was, there was no way I could ride her off. There was no way I couldn't talk to her. And during this trip, we bonded. We spend one whole morning walking around the resort, grabbing breakfast just the two of us, and running into a flamingo that she thought was SO good. And I love that she wouldn't stop talking about that.

I'm not trying to get to know Maddie and Monica for Troy. Everything's just happened so naturally. It's all working out by itself.

"I feel like she's my little friend," I admit to her, "we had a fun morning that day."

"Seriously," he nods, "she's like a little adult that you can talk to about anything pretty much."

It's true. Maddie seems wise beyond her years. She's only five but holy moly, she can talk your ear off and she knows what she's talking about. But she's still a silly kid who says the funniest things that don't make sense sometimes. And I like hanging out with her. She's the cutest little thing.

I wash down these chips I've been eating and as soon as I set my cup to the side, our waiter brings the appetizer we ordered.

"I'm so hungry," I grab a piece of quesadilla, not even caring it's hot.

"Where do you put this all?"

"What?" I look up at Troy as I'm letting my quesadilla cool off on my plate. I realized it was way too hot to eat.

He shakes his head, "I don't know. It's such a cliche thing for me to say, but I love a girl who can eat. And I just don't really know where you put it all."

Oh. He's giving me a compliment. And normally, I'd be a little annoyed by this kind of compliment because it's so cliche, but he acknowledged that it's cliche that I don't even care. I don't know where I put it all. "It's gonna catch up to me. I have a fast metabolism, though."

"Well, I for one, love it," he grabs a slice, "I don't have to feel bad about eating all the food."

"Do you usually?"

"I mean, this one girl I was hanging out with for a bit only ate salads," he tells me, "if we came to a Mexican place, she'd get like a taco salad or something. Anywhere, she'd get a salad. And it was annoying because the first time I saw her was at a BBQ place where she was eating ribs."

For some reason, I felt like a small pain in my stomach just now.

And I think it was because he was talking about some girl he dated or hung out with.

What the actual fuck was that.

Am I feeling... jealous? I mean, it's in the past, but still. We haven't talked about exes or anything because I think that's boyfriend and girlfriend talk and we're not here yet, but obviously I knew I couldn't be the first girl in his life, you know? But hearing him say out loud that he dated some girl just felt weird to me and now I'm wondering what happened between them. I'm wondering all sorts of things. I know it only lasted a bit because he said he was only hanging out with her for a bit, but I kinda wanna know if it was longer than us or what. What he classifies as a bit. And what exactly happened.

I'm going crazy. I'm losing my freaking mind right now.

So I shake it off and decide to act sane and normal and decide to tell him a little story. "My friend once dated a guy who made it known in a really discreet way that it would suck if she gained weight or whatever. Some girls just have that mentality."

"What mentality?" Troy asks, "like, a guy will dump her the minute she puts on a couple of pounds?"

"Yeah," I shrug, "it's a real thing. Some guys are assholes. And usually when you're dating someone, or when you're in a relationship, you got out to eat all the time. It's bound to happen, you know?"

Troy shakes his head and laughs, "I get it. But it's just annoying."

It could be, yeah. I'm one of those people that honest to God don't care what other people think. If someone's talking behind my back about what an ugly color I dyed my hair, I couldn't care less. Or if they hate the shirt I'm wearing. I don't cry about it, I don't get sad over it, I simply just do not care.

"I'm gonna get a salad next time," I tell him, "but it's because I really love salads."

"You're so fucking cool," he laughs.

And in turn, that made me laugh. And blush. And smile.

It's good to be home.

* * *

"This house is so nice," I tell Troy as we step into his aunts backyard.

"Yeah, come check out the view," he grabs my hand and leads me to the end of their backyard.

They live in Newport Coast in a gated community at the top of a hill and their view is out of this world. It's overlooking the ocean and down at some of the houses at the bottom of the hill and I wish I lived here. It's so beautiful. I could stand or lay here and just look at this view for hours upon hours.

I love the beach so much which is why sometimes I wished I lived in Malibu so I could have a view like this.

"I'd permanently stand here if I lived here."

"Yeah," Troy laughs, "whenever we come over, I just stand here and take it all in."

We stood here for a couple more minutes and then we went back inside in case the package came. That would suck if we missed it because we were in the back. I mean, we did drive an hour to get it. So we headed inside and he showed me around a bit more and we finally settled in the living room where we decided to watch a movie because it could take the whole four hours for it to actually come in.

He let me pick the movie so I just picked one from the collection of DVDs they had since that would probably be easier.

I decided on Fever Pitch. A lighthearted, romantic comedy. It's one of my favorite movies and Troy hadn't seen it so I thought it'd be perfect.

"I can't believe you've never seen this movie."

"Why?" Troy laughs, getting himself comfortable, "is it that good?"

"I mean, no," I laugh. It's not. It's not awkward worthy or anything like that. But it's just such a classic, in my eyes. "I just thought everyone's seen this."

He put play on the movie and it started playing. We were sitting on the same couch, but we weren't cuddling. We've never cuddled now that I think about it, and I'm not sure if it'll be awkward or not. It's only 11 AM. I feel like cuddling at this time is only for married couples or couples that have been together for long. Troy and I... we're not even a couple. I think I'm over thinking this to be honest.

So I stop thinking about it and just enjoy the movie.

And when Troy laughs at a part, it makes me happy because it seems like he's enjoying the movie.

An hour and a half later, the movie is over and the package still isn't here and I don't really know what else we're going to do. I mean, I don't mind watching TV all day. I'd do this at home if I was home right now. But I think he thinks he needs to entertain me or something.

"I'm fine with just watching TV," I tell him so he doesn't feel awkward.

"And I'm fine just sitting here and talking to you," he says, turning to me a bit, "or looking at you, if that doesn't creep you out."

I couldn't help, but laugh. And blush. And get butterflies. All of it. He's so fucking attractive that him saying things like that is so unbelievable, yet I strangely believe every word he's saying. "Shut up."

He laughs as he throws his arm around the couch and turns even more to face me so I do the same.

Now, we're looking at each other, my shoes arr off and my legs are on the couch and he's just staring at me and I'm staring at him.

And then he comes a bit closer before slowly leaning in and cupping my face with one of his hands. And then he presses his lips against mine and for some reason, every kiss just gets better and better and I don't ever want to pull away from him.

So I latch onto him, kiss him back and savor every little bit of it.

His hand moves from my face to the back of my head and through my hair. My hands find their way around his neck and I'm now somehow on top of him, but I don't think he really minds. And we just go at it. We're kissing. We're making out. And we're feeling it. Oh God, I'm feeling it. He tastes so good. He smells so good. And he kisses so good. I don't even want to stop kissing him. And as his tongue is finding it's way in my mouth, his hand is creeping down to my waist. But I don't do anything about it because I know it's fine. I know it's not going to go beyond this.

So I embrace it and I latch on a little harder, letting him know I don't want this to stop. And I need him to keep going.

But then the doorbell rings.

And we have to separate and end this amazing kiss.

Troy looks at me for a second and just gives me a smile followed by a laugh. He gives me one more kiss before getting up and going over to the door.

As I'm sitting here, watching him sign for the package from the couch, I think about how this is the last place I thought I'd be. How crazy this all is. I'm, like, dating someone. I'm hanging out with someone I like. It's the last thing I thought would happen this summer. It's the last thing I wanted to happen this summer, actually, which is why I had Parker. He was just there for fun. And this isn't just fun.

This is more. I like Troy. Those feelings weren't there for Parker. This thing with Troy, it's deeper. We talk about things. I told him all about my mom. We talked about our childhood and how we grew up. We talked about where we see ourselves in the future- career wise, everything.

It's personal. It's emotional. Everything you look for in a boyfriend- it's there.

And that kind of terrifies me.

But makes me so excited at the same time.

Because I've never really felt like this about anyone before. I've never had a serious boyfriend and I think Troy could be it if things continue going well. He's mature, he's fucking hot, he's nice, sweet, funny, God, he's so funny. He just has it all. And I like him.

"Gabriella?"

"Sorry, what?" I look up at him as he's now standing in the living room.

He chuckled, "I said we can get going if you want. Are you hungry? Wanna get lunch?"

Lunch. Right. Yes. I'm starving. "Yeah, I'm hungry."

"Okay, let's go," he grabs the control from the table and turns off the TV and then grabs the DVD case and heads over to the DVD player to grab the DVD. He puts it all back and then turns to me and gives me a smile. "What are you in the mood for? There's this really good Italian place if you're up for that."

"Anything's fine," I'm being completely serious, "I'm just hungry."

He laughs and we walk over to the foyer where he grabs his keys from the table against the wall.

And then we head out and jump in his car.

"Let's do Italian," he says, starting his car, "I think that's what I'm in the mood for."

"Okay," I smile, buckling up.

And before he buckles himself up, he looks over at me, gives me a smile and then leans in and gives me a kiss. And I love that. I love that it seems like we're at this place where it's normal for us to be giving kisses to each other. It's normal to hold hands in public and stuff. I want that... with him.

Troy then pulls away and buckles himself up. "Okay, let's go."

Man oh man.


	17. Chapter 17

I start school in a couple of weeks and I'm so not excited.

Actually, I am excited. But I'm not looking forward to the work college is going to bring and all the stress.

Summer has just gone by so fast, but it's been a good one. I mean, I didn't go to the Bahamas with my friends, but Hawaii was beautiful. I've hung out with my friends and have made such fun memories with them. And I met Troy who I've been dating for the past month or so now.

But August is in it's last days and I start school two weeks into September.

So, I have to make the most out of what remains of summer break. Which is why I'm at Disneyland right now having the time of my life.

"I need another one of these," I tell Troy.

"Want me to get you one?" He asks me, stopping in his tracks.

I stop walking as well and shake my head, "oh, no. I was just talking nonsense, but maybe on the way out of something."

He laughs and we continue walking through the park to meet up with Jess and her boyfriend. We're sort of on a double date, but it's an all day thing so it's pretty much just four people hanging out. They're a couple, though, and we're not. And that's something I've been thinking about lately. It's been a month and I don't know, I just think we should either become boyfriend and girlfriend, give me some security, or just call it off and go our separate ways.

Even though, I can't imagine doing that because I really, really like him.

But right now, I'm not going to stress about it because we're at Disneyland AND because we're both not moving away come school so that's good.

As we reach the place we're supposed to, to meet Jess and her boyfriend, they're nowhere to be found so we take a seat on a bench nearby and wait for them to get back from wherever they went. I finished my churro already which I was bummed about but at least I still have my frozen lemonade.

"The food here is so good," I say as I sip on my lemonade.

"I know, I haven't been here in a while," Troy tells me, leaning back on the bench.

As we're waiting, I take my phone out of my little satchel and go through the pictures I've taken today. I've only take a handful, but I took one I really, really like- Troy and I waiting in line at Space Mountain. It's a selfie and I just think he looks SO good in it.

And I really want to post it somewhere.

But I don't know how he feels about that because we've taken pictures on my phone, on his phone, but they haven't ended up anywhere. And I was always worried about posting a picture of us because what if he didn't want me to? So I never did. And he never did either so I took that as a sign like he didn't really want me to or something. I don't know. Maybe he's still dating other girls and he doesn't want them to see.

Here's a way to find out, I guess. "Can I post this picture?"

"What?" he looks a little taken aback. Fuck. "You want to post a picture of us?"

"Yeah," I say, a little worried. He looks at me for a moment and then laughs and it's making me uncomfortable to be honest. "What?"

He shakes his head, "no, nothing, sorry. I just... why do you need my permission to post a picture?"

Oh. He was just laughing at the fact that I was asking. Okay, uh, that's fine... that's good. But now's the perfect time to address this weird situation. I just never really knew if he'd get mad if I posted a picture without asking. "Well, what if you don't like the picture or you don't want other people to see it?"

"I like the picture," he says, "and even if I didn't, I don't think anyone I know follows you or vice versa. Maybe a couple people."

"Oh," I say, a little disappointed.

This is a weird feeling. He's giving me permission, well, saying I don't need his permission and that he likes the picture but it wouldn't matter if I posted it because none of his friends would see it. What if they were able to see it? He wouldn't want me to post it?"

I don't really know what else to say and I don't think he thinks anything's wrong.

But we're on the topic, so I kind of want to get it out there. "I was just wondering because we've taken multiple pictures together and you haven't posted any, so I didn't know if I could or whatever."

"Oh," he says, like he's surprised I'm calling him out on it. "Does it really matter? You want everyone to know your business?"

"It's not like it's top secret business," I argue, "unless you don't want anyone to know..."

"I've just never been that guy," he shrugs, "who puts everything on social media and talks about what they've got going on... personal or not."

I guess because one quick look at his twitter and it's all very basic shit. Nothing personal. But his instagram, he posts pictures. He just posted one yesterday of him at a BBQ with friends. And if you go back a year, which I have because I'm creepy, there are two pictures of him and a girl. So I'm not sure I believe him. I just think he doesn't want to post a picture with me for whatever reason. I don't really know.

Oh fuck. Is he because come school, we're going to go our separate ways?

Ugh that has to be it. This is just a summer fling and he's leading me on and he's going to find a great girl in college and that's why he doesn't want to post a picture with me. He doesn't want to seem taken. And he doesn't care if I post it because we don't have many mutual friends.

Whatever, I get off this topic because I don't want to ruin the day even though it kind of made me realize that maybe this isn't as great as I thought.

"No, yeah, I get it," I give him a smile.

But I think he could sense it was a fake one because then he turned to me and kissed me.

And just like that, I managed to forget everything for the day.

Ugh fuccccck.

* * *

"How did you get her to be such a good dog?"

"What?" Christine looks up from her phone at me petting Lola. "Oh, I don't know, patience... it's just the kind of dog she is."

Well, she's the best dog and I want her. I mean, I love my dogs, they're the best. And well behaved. But Lola... she's the cutest thing, ever. So sweet. And she always just wants to cuddle and I love coming here so I can hang out with her. And Christine, of course.

But right now, Lola's paying more attention to me than my own best friend.

"Aww, Lo," I laugh as she climbs on top of me, extending her paw to the top of my shoulder, "you know you're not allowed on the couch. Get down, but still let me pet you. You're the cutest. You're so lucky you're a dog because boys suck and you don't have to look for a boyfriend if you don't want to you know? You're good on your own. You have your family. What else do you need?"

"What the fuck," Christine laughs, putting her phone down on the table, "what are you saying?"

"Nothing," I tell her.

I'm so annoying. I'm talking to a dog. And I'm projecting, but ugh. Troy. He's pissing me off a bit, because like I feel this is going somewhere, I feel like we're dating exclusively, or how it feels to be dating exclusively, and I'm not sure we're on the same page about things. Especially with our conversation yesterday.

But of course Christine knows something's up. "Uh oh. Should I not have said hi to Troy today then when I saw him at Urth?"

"What? You saw him? Why are you barely telling me?"

"Um, you just got to my house five minutes ago," she reminds me.

Oh right. I'm being crazy. I'm being so crazy, actually. Christine and Troy have met twice, once she was leaving my house and he was getting there and the other time, they were around each other for a good thirty minutes so they've talked. They'd recognize each other in public. And yeah, I knew he went to Urth today because his sister posted a picture of their meal and was all, like, sister and brother time or something like that.

I wish they would have invited me because I did ask what he was up to, kind of implying I wanted to hang, but nah, he didn't.

It's okay. He needs sister time. I get it.

"Did you guys talk?" I start asking questions, "he was only there with his sister,right?"

"I don't know who his sister is," Christine shrugs, "but uh, light brown haired girl, really pretty."

"It was his sister," I tell her.

If it wasn't, I don't know, I'd feel weird about it for sure. But do I have grounds to feel weird? I do, right? We're dating. We're hanging out. I'm under the impression that it's just me because we haven't talked about it, but what 18 year old, almost 19, casually dates multiple women? That's something you do when you're in your late 20's, maybe early, and on. Not when you're still a teenager. You usually stick to one girl. And if you don't stick to one girl, you just hook up with them a couple times and that's that. But we're past hooking up so I'd say we're dating, for sure.

Christine gives me a weird look and then joins me on the couch I'm on, "are you okay? You seem a little... off. And what you said to Lola..."

"I just don't know where we stand and it's making me go crazy."

"Oh," she says as if it's nothing, "straight up ask him, weirdo. You guys have been hanging out for, like, a month. You have a right to know where it's headed and he's not going to think you're crazy for asking or anything. If he does, dude has problems."

"I know I have a right to ask and know, but what if it's just casual to him and it's not to me and then I'm all bummed out?"

She grabs her water that's sitting on the coffee table and uncaps it before turning to me, "I doubt it's casual to him. If it was, he wouldn't hang out with you almost every single day he possibly can. He likes you and you like him... do what normal people do when that happens, talk about it and get together."

In theory that sounds wonderful, but who knows how it'll go. I hope it'll go that way.

And I mean, if I'm honest, I do think it could go that way.

The way he makes me feel, the things he says to me, how we hang out and have so much fun together... how could it not be leading to that?

So I take a deep breath and realize that all that needs to happen is we need to have a talk about where we stand and then things will be fine. Or they won't be, but at least I'll have an answer and I can get on with my life and not sit in bed wondering what is happening.

"Thanks, Chris," I smile at her.

"Hey, what are best friends for?" she tells me.

True. I'd be lost without them. I love my friends so much.


	18. Chapter 18

"What are you in the mood for?"

"Oh, I don't care," I tell Troy as I'm shuffling through this magazine, "you pick. I picked last time."

He doesn't fight me on it. That's usually how it goes. We take turns picking. But if we really don't want what the other person wants then we decide together, but most of the time, it works out fine. "I'm kind of craving Mexican."

I smile because I'm craving Mexican, too, so it's perfect. "I mean, yeah, sure if you want that, I can go for it, too."

Troy laughs knowing full well I want that, too. I'm always down for Mexican. It's one of those types of foods I don't ever get tired of. "Great."

We're currently in his living room and we can't leave until Monica comes and picks up Maddie, which will be soon. Any minute now, I think. I don't mind, tough, because I'm not THAT hungry yet. And I did get here a little bit early. I just didn't want to go home after hanging with my friends only to leave again so here, I am. His mom is subscribed to so many magazines, though, that I'm just sitting here, reading through all of them, catching up with Hollywood.

"Mads, your mom will be here soon, why don't you go and get your stuff?" Troy tells her.

"I don't have any stuff," she turns around from coloring.

"You brought a backpack with you," he reminds her, getting up from the couch and going to get her little cardigan she had on.

Madeline put her crayons down, closed the coloring book and got up from her chair. "My backpack is empty. I just carry it around for fun so I got no stuffs in it. Oh, is my mom going to take me to get some ice cream? Did you tell her I wanted some? I'm hungry."

I laugh because I mean, how could I not? She's the cutest. And so funny. She's always saying the most funny things for a girl her age.

"Just go get your backpack," Troy laughs, "and I'll talk to your mom about the ice cream, okay?"

She ran off to go upstairs and grab her backpack and then Troy came back to the couch with her little cardigan in hand. And I closed the magazine I was reading and threw it on the coffee table with the rest of the magazines. I looked around for my purse so I could grab my chapstick, but I realized I left it in the car. Dammit. Whatever. So I just sat here and stared at Troy because he's so hot, how could I not? And he stared back at me, giving me a small smile and a laugh because he caught me staring. But at this point, I didn't mind. I didn't care.

I embraced it. "You're so hot."

"So are you," he says, turning his body a bit towards me.

And as soon as I was about to lean in and kiss him, my phone rang. Dammit. It was my cousin, which I couldn't ignore. She'll get mad if I did.

So, I get up, tell him I'll be outside talking to her and that it could be a little while because she talks a lot and then make my way to his backyard. I know what my cousin's calling about and it's kind of personal, so it's better if I'm alone and talking to her. And his backyard is the perfect place to do that.

Just as I suspect, it's boyfriend problems and I try to be as sympathetic as I can, but ugh, the guy she's dating is not for her.

I kindly let her know that she could do better and that I love her.

15 minutes later, I'm off the phone with her as we came to a conclusion that she doesn't deserve all this bullshit and drama and thank God for that. I hope she actually means it because I hate when girls stick with guys who do them wrong when they have nothing holding them together.

When I walk back inside, no one's in the living room anymore. They're not in the kitchen, either, which is visible from the living room. So I go to the front living room where I'm guessing they could be.

And yep, I hear voices coming from there. Specifically Monica's, who's laughing about something.

"Hey, I wanna thank you about Gabriella," I hear her say, which immediately makes me stop in my tracks and take a step back.

Thank Troy about Gabriella? Me? What is she talking about? No way could I go inside that living room now. Nope. I'm standing right here, behind this wall, along these stairs and listening to what she's going to say next. What Troy's response is going to be. I mean, what could she possibly mean by that?

I made sure not to make any noise whatsoever and pray that Maddie didn't come out of that living room or anyone else for that matter.

"We made a breakthrough in Hawaii and it's all because of you," she continues, "I know I didn't approach the situation the best way I could, and it's totally understandable that she wouldn't want her dad to date some new chick, but now, everything's different. We talk. We laugh. So, I can't thank you enough for what you did. It really did feel like the minute you stepped in, things changed."

What the fuck am I listening to right now?

No. There's no way what's coming to my mind right now regarding what I'm hearing is true. There's no way.

Did Troy start hanging out with me so I can be nice to Monica?!

That's exactly what I'm picking up from this conversation and I can not even believe it. I can not believe that this guy, this guy who I genuinely thought I had a connection with and who I enjoyed hanging out with so much only started hanging out with me as a favor or whatever.

"You're family," I hear Troy say, probably with a smile or something, "I'd do anything for you."

Fuck. No. This isn't happening.

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME!? I knew it was too good to be true. I knew Troy Bolton was too perfect and everything he ever said to me was, too.

"Well, thank you," Monica told him, "I really appreciate it. She's just so... nice now. And engaging. And I love that. I love the space we're in because Joseph is the best guy and I really care about him and I want this to work out, you know?"

"Of course," he tells her, "yeah, yeah, I hope it does work out for you two, and I'm glad I could help in any way I could, you know..."

I gotta get out of here. Now. I have to.

Monica starts talking about Madeline and asked how she was so once they were off the subject, I snuck back to the living room in the back and just chilled there for a minute. I couldn't walk in the second they started talking about something else. No way. They would figure out that I was there listening. So, I'm standing here, thinking of a plan to get the fuck out of here. I'm not going to lunch with him after all. I don't think I ever want to see him again.

Our relationship, or whatever it was, was a lie. A stupid, big lie.

He started talking to me for Monica. So I could ease up on her or something. Like, how fucking movie like is this?!

Did she just assume because Troy is hot and I'm a girl that I would go gaga over him and be nice to everyone around me, especially her because they're basically family? Probably. I mean, that's what happened so the thing she was trying to do, happened. I proved her theory right. And I hate that. Ugh.

Maybe I did ease up on her after Troy and I started hanging out... no, I know I did. I just figured if this great guy considers Monica family and one of the best people he knows, what could be so bad about her?

So I took a chance, talked to her like an adult, and yeah... she wasn't so bad after all.

Fuck them. And their plan. And for using me like that. Fuck everything. I'm so, so mad at Troy. How could he actually do this to someone?

I took a deep breath and thought about what to say. I need to get out there soon or he'll come back here and then I'll be tongue tied and I won't have an excuse ready. Ugh. My cousin... my cousin called and she needs me. Okay, perfect. I did get a call from her so it's not crazy to assume something's wrong. I'll say I'll call him later and that'll be the end of that and I can go home and figure all this shit out by myself.

The positive thing about this whole thing is, me eavesdropping, is that I know she really cares about my father. I heard it. And well, that's nice...

Everything else, though, is bullshit. And I'm so fucking hurt.

Embarrassed. Hurt. Mad. Disappointed.

I gather myself together to go and tell Troy I have to do. I need to get out of here. I don't want to be here. All I wanna do is go home and maybe cry into my pillow or something because I've never felt so betrayed. I've never been used like this. And it's so humiliating and heartbreaking.

"Hey," I interrupt their talking as I'm standing in the doorway of the living room, "um, I have to go."

"What?" Troy takes a step towards me, "why?"

"My cousin... she's going through something and I know we were going to go to lunch, but um, maybe dinner?" There's no way I'm doing dinner. I'm just saying this shit so he doesn't think something's up right now. I don't want a big confrontation in front of Madeline. Later on, I'll text him and tell him dinner's not good either or something. Maybe later on, I'll feel up to yelling at him in person. I don't know. I think I need a day to myself. "Sorry."

He shakes his head, "oh, no, it's okay. I get it. Dinner sounds good."

Whatever. I look over at Monica, who's standing there holding Madeline's backpack and I give her a smile. It's fake of course. "Hi."

"Is everything okay with your cousin?"

"Nothing serious," I tell her, looking down at my phone for a second, making it look like I have a text or something and I have to get going. "Yeah, sorry, but um, yeah, call me later or something. I have to go..."

Troy looks like he's about to step forward, but I just give them both a smile and then turn around and head out that door as fast as I possibly can.

I get in my car, turn it on and drive the fuck out of there. I'm so mad. I'm so sad, I think. I'm just... ugh. I cannot believe I'm going through this. This is only supposed to happen in fucking movies where someone overhears a conversation about the truth. Not here. Not now when I wanted to talk to Troy about where this relationship is going. Today was going to be that day, but I guess not anymore.

Now, we're going to talk about how this relationship was a fucking lie and a ploy to get me to like Monica.

Fuck Troy Bolton.

* * *

Thank God my dad is out of town and my sister's now home right now.

All I wanna do is cuddle with Coco and watch some TV or something and get my mind off of everything that just happened.

But that's almost impossible. My mind has been wandering back to that conversation for the past hour that I've been home. Every single word Monica uttered made me believe that they conspired to get me to like her. Like, what the fuck kind of shit is that?!

And you know what? It worked. It fucking worked. I like Monica. I don't know how to unlike her. Maybe this whole conversation that just took place with Troy set her back a bit, but ugh, I accepted her and I don't want to unaccept her now.

"Coco, why do guys suck?"

She didn't say anything, obviously. She just gave me her paw.

I can't stop thinking how embarrassed I feel even though they don't know I know. I'm embarrassed for myself. I'm hurt. And I'm angry. I'm so angry that Troy would play with my feelings like that. Like I haven't already been through so much. Fuck him. He knew all the right things to say to get me to like him. What, was he going to break whatever this was up once school settled in a bit and blame it on that? Probably. It's the easiest excuse. And I would believe it. Someone who just wants to focus on school. I don't know. I'm so angry. Why would they do this to me? Was I that awful to her that she needed the help of her incredibly attractive "nephew?" My goodness. How sad is that, to be honest. Nope. I'm not going to make excuses for them. What they did to me, in thinking that Troy actually liked me, is inexcusable and disgusting and just downright mean...

My thought couldn't even be finished bcause the doorbell rang. Ugh. Who could that be? I'm way too comfortable to get up right now. But I did. I got up, put Coco on the floor and headed to the door.

And through the peephole, I saw Troy. Troy fucking Bolton.

Shit. Shit. Shit. I don't wanna open he knows I'm home. And he'll know something's up and I don't know if I necessarily want to talk about it all yet. But then I decide now's a good as time as any. No one's home. I can yell at him however much I want and however loud I want.

So, I open the door and stand there, emotionless, while Coco jumps all over him.

"Yeah?"

"I'm not stupid, I know something's up," he tells me, taking a step inside, "are you okay? Why'd you actually leave?"

"Oh, I don't know!" I slam the door and turn to him, ready to cuss him out, ready to give him a piece of my mind. "Maybe because this isn't real. You and I... it was set up and you used me and you don't actually care about me and I fucking hate you and I want you to leave my house right now!"

Troy's face was blank. And as much as I wanted to yell at him and tell him how hurt I was, I wanted him to go because being in front of him was too hard.

But he shook his head and tried to come towards me, "no, no, what Monica said... you heard that?"

"Yes, I fucking heard it and I'm so fucking angry, Troy," I tell him, backing up, "I'm so mad you would use me like that. What, she told you to go out with the poor girl, the girl who lost her mommy and is vulnerable and stupid and would believe anything a guy says to her, so I would take it easy on her?"

"No, no," he takes a step towards me, "that conversation... you're misinterpreting it..."

"Fuck you!" I yell, "I heard everything she said, I heard what you said. It was clear as day, and of course, of course it worked. I probably subconsciously gave her a chance because of you, so you happy? You got what you wanted..."

Again, he tried to tell me it wasn't like that and I heard it all wrong and blah, blah, blah. Of course he's going to try to save face.

I'm not going to budge. No matter how attractive he is.

"Can you just leave? You don't want me, you don't want a relationship, you probably just want you cake and you wanna eat it, too," I tell him, calming down just a bit, but ugh, I'm SO mad. "I don't care what you have to say, this is it. This is over... whatever it is, I can't do it. You feeding me all these bullshit lines that are too perfect, I can't. It was all a lie and I don't want to talk to you, I don't want to see you..."

"It wasn't a lie!" he interrupts me, "it wasn't!"

"Yeah, it was," I say, "and I want you to leave right now because I have nothing more to say to you. You're probably just trying to save face, trying to convince me it's not, when we all know the truth. I heard Monica, there's no way around it and I want you to go..."

It seems like he doesn't want to, like he's going to fight me on it. "The feelings are real, Gabriella, honestly, just let me explain why she said all of that..."

Nope. NO. I don't want him to.

And I'm not going to bring up the instagram stuff because it's so trivial and so childish and frankly, really, really dumb. But it is kind of part of the problem, too, for me at least. Him not wanting to post a picture of us, him being okay that I post one ONLY because no one he knows follow me and blah blah blah... ugh, it just proves all of this. It wasn't real to him so why would he put it out there? I get it now. And it's SO dumb, I know. But it's how I feel.

"Please just go," I beg of him, almost to the point of tears. "I have nothing to say."

"Fine," he says, sounding a bit angry now, but I'm not going to care about it. "Fine, I'll go if that's what you want."

I think he may want me to say, no, never mind, but I'm not going to do that. I need him to go and I need to get him out of my life. It hurts. These feelings were real for me and they weren't real for him, even if he's trying to prove otherwise. Why in the world would Monica say stuff like that?

When I open the door, he doesn't move for a moment.

But then he finally takes a step forward, gives me a look, like he's sorry or soemthing, and then walks out the door and doesn't look back at all. And once the door is closed, I walk over to the couch, lay down and... cry. Cry over this fucking guy.

I hate all of this. I hate it so much.

And I just wish my mom were here to comfort me. But if she were here, none of this would have happened. I wouldn't have met Troy.

Just like that, my life went from becoming great again to sucking...


	19. Chapter 19

"What's up?" Victoria opens the door for me. "Are you hungry?"

I laugh because I'm not even in her house yet and she's asking me if I'm hungry. "I'm always hungry."

She laughs and closes the door behind me and we walk to her kitchen. She has Chinese food take out. Yesssss. There are about 10 containers on the table which is ridiculous, really, but maybe she's expecting more people, I don't know.

"Who's all coming?"

"Just Christine in a bit," she says, "but I just went crazy. I couldn't really decide what I wanted so I just grabbed a whole bunch."

That's Victoria for you. Miss Indecisive. "Well, I'm glad I came over then."

She grabs me a plate and a fork and hands it to me. "How was school? How many classes did you have today?"

School felt SO long. It's only a ten minute drive so I'm glad I can be home, but I'm a little worried about missing out on the social life, but I'm sure I'll be fine. Christine is there with me. "It was fine, long, but fine. Hasn't gotten too hard."

"Same," she says. She's at USC which is kinda a drive, but she didn't want to get an apartment around there just yet. "Give it a couple of weeks."

"I miss Soph," I spoon some chow mein onto my plate.

"Let's go visit her soon," Victoria laughs, "I miss her, too. Santa Barbara is not that far."

It's not. And the idea of a mini road trip sounds exciting. Getting out of LA for a bit sounds even more exciting. "I'm free next weekend if you are. I'll drive. Well, we have to ask her first. But what could she have going on?"

Victoria shrugs, "probably nothing yet. But I'm down. I don't have anything going on next weekend, either. Let's ask Christine."

And suddenly, I'm really excited.

This Chinese food is everything, too. It's SO good.

It's making me forget about the shitty day I felt like I was having.

"You'll never believe who I saw today," Victoria's eyes widened as she remembered or something, "oh my gosh. It was crazy. He didn't see me and even if he did, I'm not sure he'd recognize me because I've only met him once, but..."

"Troy," I say, with no emotion. Who else? They go to the same school. "Can we not?"

"Sorry," she says, filling her plate and then coming over to sit next to me. "Sorry, I just thought it was crazy. Out of all people, I see him..."

"Yeah," I suddenly don't really want to eat and it's weird. It's SO weird how it's all over between us... whatever we had. And it's way too soon to be talking about it. We just called things off a few days ago and I don't want to think about it. I don't wanna talk about it.

Victoria stayed quiet for a minute as she ate her food and then she turned to me. "Are you okay? Come on, we have to talk about it."

No, we don't. "I'm fine."

"But you're not," she says, "you really liked this guy."

"Yeah, and he didn't really like me," I remind her of everything I told her last night, "it was all for nothing and I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to think about it. I just want to forget about him. I want to forget about the summer and just move on and forget him."

"That's fine, but it's okay to be sad about it. You don't have to act like you're fine."

I don't have to, but I want to. "There's no use in being sad over it. Nothing's going to change.. It was all for nothing, like I said. He doesn't care about me. He doesn't want me. It was all for stupid Monica and I was just... nothing."

Victoria sighed. "Somehow I don't feel like that's true, but I was never around you guys."

"None of it matters, Tor," I tell her, "it's done with. He doesn't care about me and I need to stop caring about him. It was all so stupid."

"But Monica tried telling you that you heard it all wrong," she tells me, as if she's on their side, "and Troy, too."

"Obviously they're going to deny it!" I tell her, "Monica is still with my dad, do you think she wants me to go back to hating her? Obviously not, Tor. And Troy, well, he's just protecting Monica. And I'm so done. How they could just use me like that. NO, thank you."

Tor stayed quiet because she knows I'm right.

What they did was gross and mean and I can never understand why.

But whatever, I'm moving on. I'm out of that fake situation and I'm in school now. I'm not thinking about him, I'm not hanging out with him. The truth is, though, I'm still thinking about him. I haven't been able to stop thinking about him.

And it sucks. It sucks how much I liked him in such a short amount of time. It sucks that he's everything I look for in a guy, in a boyfriend, in a friend.

It was all a lie, though, and I have to remind myself of that.

"Is that your phone?"

"What?" I say, snapping out of my thoughts before grabbing my phone from my purse.

And as soon as my eyes landed on my phone, I saw that I had a instagram notification on my home screen.

**Troy Bolton tagged you in a picture. **

What the actual fuck. Is this a joke? Am I dreaming? We were just talking about him and now he's tagging me in a picture? What picture? And why the fuck is he tagging me in a picture? This is weird. Is this really happening? Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. I don't know what to do.

"What?" Victoria asks me, but I ignore her for the time being.

I quickly get up and walk out of the kitchen and to her living room because I just need to be alone for a minute. Thankfully, she doesn't follow me.

And once I take a deep breath and realize this is actually real, I open the notification.

It's a picture of Troy and I kissing.

And he posted it to his instagram account and he tagged me in it.

I'm dreaming. Right? Why the fuck is he posting a picture of us when we're not together, when I told him I want nothing to do with him? I stopped following him on here. I didn't want to see anything. I just don't get it. I don't get what's happening. And why he's posting this.

But then I scroll down a bit and I read the caption.

**This girl. **

It's so simple. No emoji heart, no emoji smiley, no regular smiley, nothing. Just "this girl."

And for some reason, it's making me blush and have butterflies in my stomach. It's making me giddy. It's making me... forget anything ever happened. We're not together. We're not anything. And he's posting this? He's finally posting a picture of us. And the bigger picture is, he's letting me know that he wants people to know about us. He wants ME to know that he's serious about it. And sorry. And it's a bigger gesture than some people would think.

I mean, we're kissing in the picture. It's obviously showing we're something more than friends and that's making me smile.

Maybe they meant something entirely different and I just jumped to conclusions because it was all too good to be true. Troy came into the picture and everything was great and maybe all that just scared me or something.

But at the same time, after hearing everything, it all just felt like no coincidence so it was hard to not believe it.

This picture, though... this picture is everything.

It was taken a couple of weeks ago and it was actually the best day we spent together. The day in Orange County where we chilled at his aunts house for a little while and then we went to the beach over there. We went shopping. And then had an amazing dinner. It was just the perfect day.

And we capped it off by taking a picture with the sun setting and at the last second, he turned my head and kissed me and I'm smiling while he's kissing me.

I hadn't seen this picture, actually, because it was taken on his phone. I thought I was taking it on my phone, but I accidentally picked up his phone instead and he never sent me the picture and I kind of forgot about it. So seeing it now, it's bringing me back.

We did have something special and maybe it was real, maybe everything he felt was everything I was feeling.

All I know is that I have to talk to him because I can't ignore a post like this.

"Tor!" I yell at her from the living room, "I'll be back!"

And with that, I left.


	20. Chapter 20

Troy's parents are gone for the week. And his sister's probably at school or something.

So, sitting on his front porch, I'm not really nervous about anything other than him coming home and us talking about things.

I know his last class ended an hour ago so unless he had plans after school, then he should be here any minute. But I think I'd wait for him for hours because there's no way I'm just going to text him and ask to talk, that's annoying. And I know it's rude to just show up at someone's house, but he posted this picture of us and I need to talk to him. I want to talk to him. We have to figure things out or we need to move on.

There's no denying that post gave me butterflies and made me feel great about him showing me off.

But it's more than that. It's him possibly lying about how this whole thing started... he only started hanging out with me so I can take it easy on Monica.

And it worked. I did take it easy on her. I was nice to her. I talked to her. I shared things with her. I laughed with Maddie and we played together. It was real for me. And if they schemed together to make that happened, well, I don't know if I can just forgive that no matter him posting the picture.

"Where did you go?!" Tor exclaims over the phone, "Christine's here."

"Sorry," I tell her, thinking about my food just sitting here, "um, I had to take care of something. I'll explain later."

A few more words here and there and then we hung up.

Because Troy was pulling up.

And I had to get ready to face him, to talk to him about everything, and get everything off my chest.

A few moments later, he's getting out of his car and he looks so good.

"Hi," he tells me, coming up to his porch.

"Hey," I get up, feeling a little bit awkward that I was just sitting here.

He looks better than he did a couple days ago if that's even possible. It is possible, it's just so crazy how attractive he is. God, he's hot. But I throw that to the back of my mind and remember that I can't just let his good looks and his charm suck me in. We really need to talk about things. I mean, he wanted to the other day but I just wasn't ready and I was still too mad to comprehend everything that was going on.

And then we both just stand there for a moment, not saying anything and it does feel a little awkward because I don't know where to really begin.

But I decide to just go with what exactly I'm feeling. "So, you tag me in a picture on instagram and that's it? No text message, no phone call? Do you expect everything to just be okay now?"

"Not at all," he says, coming closer, "but it got you here and that's step one, because I really, really want to talk to you."

"So talk," I tell him. I'm not going to yell like that other day or interrupt him or shut him down.

I really just want to hear what he has to say.

He looks a little taken aback, but I mean, he did post the picture, isn't this what he wanted? But before he said anything else, he opened the front door and he told me to come inside so I did. And then he follows me in, closes the door behind me and leads me to the living room so we can talk.

I'm a bit nervous. I don't know if I should be here just yet.

But I can't deny that picture he posted because if this was all fake, why would he put it? Wouldn't he be okay with it finally being over and he didn't have to pretend anymore to date me? That's how I see it, but who knows, really.

"Gabriella, I like you," is the first thing he tells me as he's standing in front of me while I'm sitting on this couch.

"Why should I believe you?"

"Because you just should," he says like it's nothing, "because it's the truth. I really like you and I want you to be my girlfriend and I want to experience life with you and go on dates and laugh and be there for you when you need me to. I want all of that with you because I really, really like and care about you. This was never fake to me. It's always been real. Every single word I've ever said to you was real."

Oh man, he's going to make this hard. Right away, I soften up and I feel like he's telling the truth, but our relationship started as a lie.

And maybe he's just trying to save face and in two months he's going to break up with me and he can't blame it on this, he'll be able to blame it on something else that could have happened between those two months.

Right?

"You lied to me," I remind him, "you only started hanging out with me for Monica. Our whole relationship was a lie."

"It wasn't!" He pleaded, sitting down on the coffee table in front of me, "it wasn't a lie at all. Monica never once told me to get you to like me, to date you so you can soften up towards her, no, nothing like that. All she suggested was me talking to you, letting you know that she's not so bad and you should give her a chance and did I do that? Once, yeah, but it's not up to me what you feel and I stopped. But what started to happen after talking to you, was not under anyone's influence but mine and I promise you that. That's exactly what she meant. She thought I talked to you about how great she is and I did, but I didn't let her know that it wasn't much."

I wanna believe him because it's true when he said he only brought it up once. Maybe twice. And the other times we talked about her, I initiated it. I'm the one who asked questions so I can see that being true, but it's hard to believe.

Because I went from not wanting to know Monica at all to being completely fine with her and it all happened when Troy was in the picture.

It's like they knew Troy would make me so happy that all the anger and bad feelings I had towards Monica would just wash away or something.

"It just looked like too much of a coincidence," I confess to him, "It's like you knew all the right things to say, Monica was in my ear telling me how great you are and how you would never hurt me and blah blah blah. It's just..."

"It's true," he tells me, "I would never hurt you. Intentionally. And that's why this isn't true. Monica NEVER told me to date you. We never schemed. We didn't do any of that. It was all me, it's all me and all she really wanted was for someone to put a good word in for her. And I was happy to do that because she's family. But God no. I would never do that to you, to anyone and I really want you to understand that."

I think I do.

I believe him. I believe they didn't scheme. They didn't have this master plan together.

Because the way he made me felt, I don't think you can make that up. We have something special here. And I don't think I can walk away from him. I don't want to walk away from him. I want to be his girlfriend. And go on dates with him. And experience life with him. Everything he said.

And maybe I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions, but it was so hard no to.

"You know, as silly as it sounds, the fact that you never put pictures of us up on your instagram or the fact that I never met your friends, it made me think that this wasn't serious. I was a summer fling, and then I overheard everything and it made sense. You wouldn't want to put a picture of us up because it's not real. This is fake." I pause for a moment and look him right in the eyes. "And then you posted that picture and it changed everything. It's silly, it's weird, but it showed me this is real and I don't want to walk away from it because I think this could be something great."

"It is something great," he moves from the table to the couch and grabs my hand, "I'm sorry for making it seem like a secret, but it wasn't. I just wanted you all to myself for the summer, to get to know you and I did and I like you and I want so badly for you to be my girlfriend."

I feel like crying. Happy tears, of course. But I'm not.

I'm going to hold it all in and just smile like an idiot because I'm so glad we're able to move past this.

Troy Bolton would never intentionally hurt me, I know that and I should have known that and I should have heard him out. I should have heard Monica out, but I was too stubborn and I just thought it was all too good to be true, anyway.

But it's not because it is true.

"I'm sorry," I tell him, "for not trusting you."

"It's a process, but we're going to get there," he tells me before grabbing my face and giving me the best kiss, ever. And then he backs up and gives me a smile. "I'm glad we're fine because people have commented telling me how cute we are and I have fifty likes on it already."

I couldn't help, but laugh. Fucking instagram. It's actually so stupid. But I'm glad to hear that.

We are cute together and I can't wait to see what the future holds for us.

I feel like it's going to be good.


	21. Chapter 21

Everything's fine.

With Troy. With Monica. With everything in my life.

Life's good. Well, as good as life could be without my mom. But I'm happy. I'm so happy, actually. And a major part of it has to do with Troy. He makes me so happy and I'm not even embarrassed to admit that my happiness is stemming from being with a guy. From having a boyfriend.

He's more than just a guy, though. He's my boyfriend and he's quickly becoming my best friend, someone I can tell anything and everything to.

"What are you thinking about?"

"What?" I snap out of my thoughts and look up at Sophia, "nothing."

"Nothing?" she smiles at me, closing the door to her room behind her, "it's not nothing."

She's right. It's nothing. I'm just thinking about everything. I've been doing that lately. Thinking about my life and how it's been so good lately. Obviously, my mom is not here and that part REALLY, really sucks. But I have to be positive and look at all the good that I have. And it's a lot. I have so many good things in my life that it's hard to be sad. It really is. I've been really, really happy these days and it's all thanks to all the wonderful people in my life.

Including my best friend Sophia. "Life's good. That's all I'm thinking about. And how happy I am that you're home for a whole month!"

"Exciting, right?" She slips off her slippers and jumps on her bed, "I've missed home so much."

"Do you wanna have a best friend date and dress up all cute and go to dinner and plan something else, but when it comes time to do it, we'll realize we're way too lazy to do it so we'll come home and binge watch some show on Netflix in our pj's and then fall asleep together?"

Sophia laughed. "I love us so much."

I loved us, too. She was my ride or die chick for life. "Is that a yes?"

"Duh!" she says, grabbing one of her pillows and hugging it as she faced towards me, "no plans with Troy?"

"No," I shake my head. I wasn't offended. I mean, she's been away at school. Instead of my weekends being occupied with her, they're now occupied with him and she knows that. But it's a balance now. And I have no problem being away from him for a day. "He can do whatever he wants to do tonight."

"You love him, don't you?"

What? This is literally the first time someone has asked me this. Well, in this way.

My sister, maybe a couple weeks ago now, asked me when we were cooking dinner one day. She asked if I was in love, if I was falling, if I saw a future with him, etc. But Sophia is basically telling me I'm in love.

And you know what... I think I am.

I think I do love Troy. I really, really think I'm in love with him. And I think I have been for a little while now.

He's everything I've ever wanted in a boyfriend. Someone who's there for me, but doesn't overcrowd me. Someone who can make me laugh, but knows when it's time to be serious. Someone who gets along with my family. Someone who is kind to everyone. Who's attractive and nice and loyal and sees the good in everyone. He's just... the best. He really, really is. And I couldn't ask for anyone better to share my life with... to be my boyfriend.

"I've never said those words out loud," I tell her, "but I think so."

"I know so," she smiles at me as we're now laying down on her bed on our sides, looking at each other, "I've never seen you this happy before."

She's right. I love Troy.

And I'm so scared to admit it. I'm so scared I'm moving way faster than he is.

"You just never know if you're on the same page," I admit, "it's scary. Feeling what I'm feeling. I... I do love him. And I think I have for a little while now, but what if he's not there yet? I'm there and if I tell him, I feel like I'll put pressure on him to get there. And what if it turns into some kind of resentment?"

"I get where you're coming from. But what if he feels the same way? You guys will just make your bond that much stronger."

She's right. But it's a scary risk to take.

And now that I've said the words out loud, I feel like all I wanna do is shout it from the rooftops, write it everywhere, tell him everything I'm feeling.

"I've only known him for seven months, Soph," I turn on my back, looking up at the ceiling, "that's crazy! It's so crazy that I could be feeling this way so soon. Like, he could one day be my... my husband. That's how I'm starting to feel and it's scaring me. It's making me feel like I'm crazy."

"Don't feel crazy," she sits up a bit, "you can feel however way you want. When you know, you know, and Gabs, I think you know. You just have to be honest with him and tell him exactly how you're feeling. It's the only way."

She's right. I have to.

And now, I want to. I really, really do.

I love him.

I'm in love with Troy Bolton and I want to shout it from the fucking rooftops.

* * *

Troy," I say, opening the door, surprised he's here.

"Sorry, you going somewhere?" He eyes the purse I'm holding in my arms.

I open the door more so he could come in, but leave it open because I'm on my way out. I had no idea he was coming over. We didn't have plans... I don't think. No, we didn't. I would remember. So I'm a little surprised he's here. "Yeah, um, I'm gonna go visit my mom."

Troy looks like he feels bad. "I should have called. I was at Justin's house and I thought I'd stop by and see what my favorite girl was doing."

"Do you wanna go to dinner?" I suggest.

"Okay," he says, coming close to me and wrapping his arms around my waist, "sounds perfect."

And then we kiss.

But I have to get going because I don't want it to get dark. It's five. So I turn around to grab the keys from the key tray, I hear troy asks me something and I'm not sure I heard him correctly. I turned back around to face him and the look on his face... yeah, I did hear him correctly.

"You want to come with me to visit my mom?" I ask him.

"If that's okay with you," he shrugs, looking a bit nervous which is SO cute.

I've thought about this, actually. In the time I've known him, I've only been with him a handful of times where I'd leave to go visit her. Other than that, it's not something I'd tell him about my day. I'm not sure why. Last time I went, though, I was leaving his house and I wanted to keep hanging out with him, so the thought of him coming crossed my mind. But I wasn't going to ask. No way. It might be too soon for that, I don't really know. I never wanted to force him or put him in a position where he felt obligated to come with me. So I just never brought it up. I never talked about it.

So when he asked, I was a little taken aback. I wasn't sure when or if ever he was going to want to come.

"That's okay with me," I tell him, "but um, are you sure you want to?"

"Yeah," he comes closer to me, "she's your mom."

Ugh. I've got a good one. And my mom would have loved him. She would have loved how he opens the car door for me and walks me to the door at night after a date. Or how he takes my phone away from me when we're studying to make sure we study. She would have loved the little nickname he gave me- Brie. She would have loved that he's stayed up with me on the phone because I couldn't sleep so he talked to me all night. Or when I got a flat tire while I was on the phone with him and he dropped everything he was doing to come help me with it. And when my dad and Monica went to a wedding and no one was home to take care of me because I was sick, he stepped in and made me the most delicious chicken soup.

She would have loved it all- the way he looks at me, treats me, talks to me. Everything.

And I so badly wish they could have met.

"Okay," I give him a smile and wrap my arms around his waist, "let's go."

But they're going to meet today... just in a different way.

I couldn't wait.

* * *

"Where is everyone?"

"My sister's out of town with my aunt and I think my dad is at his mom's house," I tell Troy as I shut the door behind us.

He drops his keys in the key tray and then picks up little Coco who was at his feet, begging to be held.

We just got done eating dinner at Sugarfish, the best sushi place in all of LA, and I'm so full. And so tired. And all I want to do is lay on the couch with him, maybe watch a movie or something and then knock out even if it is just 9 o'clock.

"I'm so full," Troy groans as he takes a seat on the couch, Coco now in his lap, begging to be pet.

"Same," I fall back as well, grabbing the blanket from the end.

And I'm tired. It's been a semi-long day, but a good one. I had a birthday brunch for my friend and then did a little bit of shopping. Then visited my mom with Troy, which was great. We just sat there for an hour. I talked to him about her. and it seemed like he really cared. I didn't cry, which surprised me. But probably because I was talking about happy memories with him, not thinking about sad ones like I do when I'm there by myself.

Troy didn't say anything to her, which was fine, it would have been kind of weird I think and I didn't want to make him uncomfortable. It was enough that he was there with me, sitting down with his arm wrapped around me. It was more than enough.

"Thanks for coming with me today," I look up at him as I put my hand on Coco to pet her. She has the softest fur.

"Nah, thanks for letting me come," he says, throwing his arm around me.

Like I've been saying... I'm so content with life right now. Sure, I so badly wish my mom was apart of it, but things happen, God does everything for a reason and well, this is my life now. I don't have her here with me physically, but she's still here. And life... life is good. I thought it would never be good. I thought it would suck for the rest of my life, but it doesn't. It doesn't at all.

School is great. I love it. I've made friends, friends I think I'll have for the rest of my life. I'm healthy. My family and I are closer than ever.

And Troy... he is the greatest boyfriend imaginable and I can't believe he's all mine.

"I wanna tell you something," Troy suddenly says.

"What?"

He smiles at me and puts Coco on the side of him, where she nuzzles up in the corner and shuts her eyes immediately. What does he have to tell me? I'm... I'm nervous. Is it bad? But he's smiling so it can't be that bad. But still, you never know, it could be anything. I have NO idea what it is.

Troy scoots a little closer to me, holding that smile on his face and I'm getting a little more nervous.

And then he leans in and kisses me, passionately, but it's only a peck.

He backs away and gives me another smile before saying anything else. "I never thought I'd be here right now... my first year of college, dating some girl I'm crazy about. Someone I wanna call to tell everything to, who I wake up every morning and think about and wanna spend every moment with. I just didn't think I'd find that... this young. But I have. And I've never been in love before so I don't know if it's all too soon or what, but I feel it, I know I do. And I just want to tell you that I love you... with everything inside of me, I love you and I want to continue loving you."

Oh my gosh.

WHAT IN THE WORLD IS GOING ON?!

Did my boyfriend just tell me he loves me? Am I dreaming? No, I'm not dreaming, right?

This is insane. Absolutely insane. Because just a week ago, I had that conversation with Sophia and I came to terms that I was madly in love with him and that I wanted him to know and wanted more than anything to have a future together. Because I love him.

I really do. I love him with my whole heart, with everything inside of me.

And now he's telling me this today. It's... crazy. But I do love him and like him, I've never been in love before, but I know this is love. I know it is.

"I love you, too," I tell him, grabbing his hand.

There was security there, for sure. I knew we were committed, I knew he was in this. But now it's just more real. He loves me and I love him and we're going to make this work. We're going to work at this relationship everyday and none of us have any plans of going anywhere any time soon and that's what it means to be in love. I love him. I do. And I don't care if I'm barely 19. I don't care that I'm in college and I'm supposed to be having fun and dating around. Or that it might all be too much too soon. But seven months of knowing someone, dating them for a majority of those months is enough time, right?

All I know is that I love Troy Bolton and I can't see myself stopping anytime soon.

"I'm not going anywhere," he tells me, grabbing my face with one hand, "I love you and I want to see where this goes."

And then we seal it with a kiss.

The most perfect kiss we've ever had together.


	22. Chapter 22

**TWO YEARS LATER  
**

"Can you help me with my homework?"

"Sure," I tell Maddie as I'm taking out some strawberries from the fridge, "let me just wash these really quick."

She smiles at me as she turns around and walks over to the counter, taking a seat around it.

Madison is 8 years old now and is in 2nd grade and she is loving it. And I'm loving it. I'm loving watching her grow up. I love being a big sister. I've done it once before and being able to do it when I'm in my 20's is really cool. I can be the cool older big sister who can drive and buy her drinks for her secret party.

Well, she's not technically my sister, but she will be soon.

My dad is proposing tonight.

Yep. He's proposing to Monica tonight and I'm completely okay with it.

These past few years, I've gotten to know Monica and I can wholeheartedly say I like her. I love her, actually. If I was five and needed a mom to guide me and shape me into someone great, she'd be the person I'd pick. She's great. She really, really is. And I'm happy for my dad. And for her. And for her and Madison to officially be apart of the family. We all are. My grandparents love her. My sister loves her. And I was just being bitter. But I realized that you could have two loves in your life and that's completely okay. My mom was his first love and Monica is his current love and that's okay. It really is.

"I'm going to Disneyland this weekend."

"You are?" I turn around from washing these strawberries and place them on a napkin, "with who?"

"My dad and my aunt and cousin," Madison says excitedly, "I'm so excited!"

I picked up Madison from school today because her dad had a meeting that was going to run late and my dad and Monica are currently in Ojai taking a little trip. She thinks it's for my dad's birthday which is next Sunday, but it's not. Well, it's not the main point of going. He's going to propose there and it's going to be beautiful and I don't think she has any idea it's coming.

Actually, I know she doesn't because my dad has been texting me on and off all day about it and she's pretty much clueless.

Just as I was about to put all these strawberries in a bowl, I hear the doorbell ring.

"Oh, I thought you were Bill."

"Bill?" Troy stepped in, "Mads is here?"

I nod as I close the door behind him, "yeah, I picked her up from school because Bill was running late."

He shrugged, like it was no big deal, then gave me a kiss hello. "I didn't have to help my grandma after all so here I am. What're you guys doing?"

"Nothing," I tell him and then led us to the back where the kitchen was. Madison was chewing away on some strawberries as she continued doing the rest of her homework. "Mads is finishing up her homework and I'm just cleaning up a bit."

"Homework?" Troy asked her as he gave her a kiss on top of her head, "on a Friday? Man, elementary school sucks."

Madison giggled, "I was absent yesterday so it's make up work."

I love watching Madison and Troy. They're, like, the best of friends. And it's so endearing to watch the way he talks to her, cares for her, looks out for her. They really are like family and I love how good he is to her and how much she loves him. It makes me love him even more, to be honest.

"What are you up to this weekend, Mads?" Troy jumps on the counter and takes a couple strawberries out of the bowl, "anything fun or exciting?"

"Yep! I'm going to Disneyland."

"Wow, thanks for the invite," he says with a laugh.

She laughs as well as she turns her pencil around to erase something, "you can come if you want."

Troy shakes his head, "nah, you'll probably have more fun with your cousin."

Madison just shrugged and continued doing her homework while Troy and I sat here, eating these strawberries. I finished up cleaning the kitchen and Troy helped her with a problem or two and the second she put everything away in her backpack, the doorbell rang again.

This time, it was her dad.

And she was excited to see him. "Daddy!"

"Hi baby," he says, picking her up for a second to give her a hug, "what's up? How was school?"

"Boring," she says, grabbing her backpack to put it on her back, "but guess what? My friend is also going to Disneyland. Maybe I'll see her there!"

"Maybe," Bill laughs and then looks up at us, "thanks again for picking her up. Work was crazy today, I couldn't escape until now."

I waved it off like it was no big deal. It isn't. I don't mind picking up Madison at all. In fact, this past year, I've been picking her up a lot more. Her school is close by and I'm happy to help. I love Bill and Monica. "Oh, anytime. It was no problem."

Bill smiled at me and then grabbed Madison by the shoulders, "we should probably go. We have dinner plans soon."

"Alright, have fun tomorrow!"

"Thanks," they both say in unison before they walk out the door.

As soon as they left, Troy and I went over to the living room and like usual, we sat down, put our feet up and discussed what we should watch. We have time to kill before going to dinner later with some friends. I'll bet you he's going to want to watch something on Hulu and it's going to be Seinfeld.

YEP. He immediately went to Hulu and then looked over at me with a smile, "Seinfeld?"

"Sure," I laugh, not really caring about it.

"How was your day?" He leans back and throws his arm behind the couch, "I feel like we didn't really talk much."

Because we didn't, really. Unfortunately, I have a two and a half hour class on Fridays this semester and that takes up most of my morning. "It was good, kinda boring. But I'm excited to go to dinner. I feel like we haven't seen Becca and Will in a while."

Troy nodded as he scrolled through the episodes, looking for one to watch, "I know, huh? It'll be nice to catch up with them tonight."

"You're staying over, right? Because Jess is in Orange County for the night."

"Of course, your bed is the most comfortable thing in the world," he laughs, deciding on an episode to watch.

It really is, so I don't blame him.

Troy and I have sex. We've been having sex. Not a lot of sex, but we do. And it's protected, of course. I'm on the pill. There's no way I'm getting pregnant right now. No way. We're in love, everything's great, everything's going in the right direction, but we're not ready for that. So, we're not crazy about sex and it's not something that needs to happen every day or anything like that. It's healthy, it's normal and I absolutely love where we're at with it.

"So, um... dad's proposing to Monica tonight."

"What?" Troy immediately stops with the remote and looks over at me, "are you serious?"

"Yeah," I nod, "he's proposing."

Troy doesn't look shocked, per say, but he does look a bit surprised and like maybe I'm messing with him, but why would I? He's seen their relationship. He knows they're in love and everything's great with them. "That's so... great. I mean, they're great. But are you... are you fine?"

I'm fine. I'm completely fine. I never thought I would be, but I am.

Monica is great and my dad is great and together, they make a great couple and I never want to take away from that. I'm completely okay with them.

"Yeah, I love Monica, you know that... and I trust my dad. If he feels ready, he's ready. I'm okay."

"Good," he tells me with a smile and puts his hand on my leg, "you know she could never replace your mom. But I'm glad you have her in your life because no matter how strong you and your sister are, having a mother figure in your life is important and she's a great mother."

"She is," I agree. She really is a great mom to Madison and over the years, the more I've gotten to know her and the more I grew comfortable with her, she's proved to me that I can trust her, one hundred percent and that she'll be there for me.

Troy smiled at me and I smiled back at him.

Everything in my life is great right now. I never thought I'd think this after that dreadful day my mom passed away.

But I do. I am thinking it. Life is great and I couldn't complain about a thing. I'm healthy, I'm happy, and everything is going so good.

Troy and I... it's been three years pretty much and I don't see it coming to an end. I really don't. Everything about him, I love. He could go on a guys trip to Vegas and I won't even stay up wondering what the hell he's doing. I trust him with everything inside of me. I know he loves me just as much as I love him and it's the greatest feeling, ever. And we just respect each other an insane amount. If there's any fighting between us, it's resolved. And it's never been this huge blow up. It's little things that we can get over. And I'm so thankful for that. It's been my first serious relationship, my only relationship really, and some people have told me that I don't know what else is out there, basically saying maybe I should explore my options. But those people aren't really my friends and they don't know what we have. What we have is special and I'm not interested in what else is out there. I'm really not.

"Can I tell you something?"

"What?" I'm looking Troy straight in the eyes now, wondering what the hell it could be.

He smiles at me, turns his body more towards me and just looks into my eyes. I'm getting a little nervous. I don't think it's anything bad, but he's freaking me out a bit. "What you just told me about your dad and Monica... they're getting married. That's a huge thing. And I know we're so young, I know it's not going to happen anytime soon, but I feel like I could marry you."

Wait. What? Is he... proposing? Like not for real, but is he promising to propose or something? "You feel like you could marry me?"

Troy nods with a small smile, "I mean, we're young. We still have so many things to do before we take that step, but I'm pretty sure this is it for me."

"I'm the only girl you wanna be with for the rest of your life?" I ask him.

"Well, I love you, so, yeah, basically."

This is what happens when you love someone. You don't see an end with them. But it's this thing you don't talk about. Obviously, I've dreamed about my future with him because I didn't see an end to it. But I was also realistic in the fact that maybe there is someone else. Maybe something could happen and there won't be an us anymore. You know? So many things. But here he is, feeling so badly what I felt. He's just articulating it. And it makes me happy.

It makes me extremely happy and giddy and excited knowing I have found my forever.

I've known this, though. A year in. Maybe even five months in. I knew this was special. And it could be very special.

"So, we're going to get married and I'm going to have your babies?"

"I'd love that," Troy laughs, but then gets serious, "this isn't a joke to me, though. I'm trying to express how I'm really feeling and I absolutely mean it. I've been thinking about it lately and I really, truly don't think there is anyone else out there for me and I don't even want to find out."

I'm getting major butterflies.

I'm so comfortable around him. I'm so at ease with him. But yet, he still gives me the biggest butterflies.

If Troy's all in, then I'm all in. "I don't, either. And it's crazy we're having this talk because we are young, but I feel everything you're feeling and I love you so much and I really don't want to imagine life without you. You make me so happy."

"And you make me happy," he tells me, "this is all about security. And making you know that you have nothing to worry about. I'm in this with you."

"I love you."

I really, really do. I love him with everything inside of me.

And I knew he loved me. I knew we were fine and everything was going great. But knowing all of this, I feel safe. I feel secured. I'm the only girl he wants forever and that is major. That is a huge deal. Could it change? Possibly. But I just don't think it will. And I'm so excited about out future.

We're going to be together forever.

I can't wait to find out what it's going to be like, what we're going to be doing, etc. I can't freaking wait.

"I love you more," Troy tells me and then leans over and gives me a kiss.

Life is so good.


	23. Chapter 23

**Epilogue **

"Hi, mom," I sit and smile down at her, "your grandson wanted to visit you today."

My little one and a half year old son looked down, mesmerized by what was going on. He knows his grandma is in Heaven and is looking down at him. And he also knows that he has three grandmas in his life... Julie Bolton, Elizabeth Montez and Monica Cruz.

Yes, Monica.

For the past eight years, she's been in my life and since three years ago, she is officially my step mom, so she's my son's grandma.

She is incredible with Noah. Her and my dad both are. They are the best grandparents a kid could have or ask for and I'm so lucky they love him the way they do. Along with Troy's parents, who constantly ask to watch him so we can have date night. And I'm so grateful for all of them, for the way they all love our son. I know they're always going to be there for him.

But I do wish my mom were here.

I wish she could meet him and take him to get ice cream even though I've said no. Just all the things a grandma would do with their grandchildren.

She's not here, though... physically. And everyday gets a little easier, but not a day goes by that I don't think about her. That I don't desperately wish she were still here. She missed all these great moments in my life and I so badly wish she were by my side to live them all with me.

"We have some news for you, don't we Noah?"

Noah giggled and squirmed in my lap a little bit before pushing himself off so he could stand next to me.

He wasn't fully talking yet, a couple things here and there, but I think he'll get there soon. He's a bright little boy who takes after his daddy.

I grabbed his hand so he wouldn't run off and then wrapped my arm around him as we both looked down. "It's a girl. We're having a little girl and we're so excited. We found out yesterday. She's healthy and expected to make her arrival into this world a few days shy of your birthday. So, we already know she's going to be a special little girl... because she'll be just like her grandma."

Noah Michael Bolton is what we named our son. Our first born child who is one and a half and the cutest little boy in the whole world.

"As soon as we found out it was a girl, we picked out a name," I continue, "Sarah. Sarah Elizabeth Bolton..."

Elizabeth Diane Montez was one of a kind and I hope my daughter will take after her. I hope she has the kindest heart just like my mom and the sweetest soul. It just wouldn't seem right not naming my child after my mom, who was the greatest. And I know she would be proud and happy about it.

Noah bent over and grabbed the single rose that my sister brought last time she was here.

But I quickly took it out of his hand. "Babe, no, there's thorns."

"Thasdsss," he so desperately tried to repeat the word, but it was no use.

"Yes," I laugh, humoring him and putting the rose back. "Did you tell grandma what your favorite color is?"

An immediate smile washed upon his face. A word he definitely knows is blue. And hearing this question makes him so happy because he gets to proudly say it. Over and over and over. "Blueeeee! Blue! Blue!"

I laughed as I grabbed him and sat him back in my lap. We could only stay for a little bit since we have to pick Maddie up from her friends house and then everyone is getting together. I still have to go to the store, too. But Noah pointed to a picture of my mom today and in his baby language told me he wanted to visit her so here we are... which is perfect because I wanted to tell her that we were having a girl.

"Life's great, mom," I smile down at her.

It's better than I could have even imagined and I'm sure she knows that. I know she's watching me from above.

But I love talking to her, still. About everything. "I have the most perfect husband. The best dad. The best friend. The best partner. My friends are still all there. And Jess and I are closer than ever. She and Andrew are celebrating three years tomorrow and I think he's planning on proposing, but that's just between you and I for now because I don't wanna say anything to anyone and have it be wrong. Embarrassing. Ha. Monica and dad seem happy and I do really love her. She's no you, obviously, but she's great. And Maddie. Maddie's 13 and I can't believe I've watched her grow up. She's great. The best little sister. Always wanting to help with Noah whenever she can..."

I stopped talking for a minute as Noah got up from my lap and walked around to the other side of her grave, looking straight at me.

God, he was precious. He had dark hair and blue eyes, just like his daddy. He's a mini Troy and I'm not complaining at all. He has my nose, though.

"Come here," I tell him, extending my arm for him to grab, which he does as he walks back around. He's a really good listener, which makes me one happy mama. "I'm almost done talking to grandma, okay? And then we can go pick Maddie up."

He knows exactly what that means and he could not be more excited for it. He loves Maddie. He loves people.

And I love him.

"Anyway," I continue talking to her, "my little family and I are great. Sometimes, I just sit and watch Troy and Noah and I can't believe this is my life. I have a husband and a kid and one on the way and I'm only 27 and I'm so happy. And I think I'll be happy forever with this family of mine. You know, the other day I was telling Troy how losing you was the worst thing I've ever gone through. But if that didn't happen, Monica wouldn't exist and that wouldn't have led me to Troy... who is my soul mate. I know he is. And so... I think there's good in goodbye sometimes. The good that came out of saying goodbye to you was meeting him, falling so deeply in love, getting married, and having kids. But I still wish you were here. I know you're watching from above, though, and are smiling down at everyone, happy for me and everyone else. I know we all miss you and we all love you very much. I love you very much."

"Mama," Noah looks up at me, "I hungry."

"Okay, let's go," I laugh at him. He's always hungry.

We get up, I grab his hand as I look down at my mom one last time and then walk away to our car.

I had not visited my mom in a couple of months, which is a little weird since I made it a point later on to always visit. But I hadn't so I wanted to update her a bit. And just in the last month alone, I felt like everything was perfect. Like everything in my life could not be better and I could not be happier about it.

And I can't see where life takes us when we have two children.

I'm so excited.

* * *

"Do you want some artichoke?"

"Bleh," I put my hand up to stop it from coming any closer to me, "sorry, one of those foods that I'm not digging right now."

Monica laughed, backing up and walking over to Maddie to ask if she wanted some. She didn't. For entirely different reasons, though. My dad took some, though. Enough for the both of us. And Troy took some as well. Bleh. So gross.

As soon as she was going to sit down, the door bell rang so she went to get it even though we're at my house. She knew I wouldn't want to get up. Ha.

And a moment later, my in laws were walking into the dining room. My mother in law with a pie in her hand.

Julie Bolton's famous cream cheese pie. Ahhh, my favorite!

"Hi, mom," Troy gets up and gives her a hug and the goes and gives his dad one as well.

"Hi," I attempt to get up, but she quickly puts her hand on my shoulder and tells me not to get up, that it's fine where I am.

"You're creating a life," she says, giving me a kiss on the head and she firmly holds onto the pie. She sets it down in the middle of the table where there's room and then looks back at me. "Everyone should come to you and you should not lift a finger for the next five months of your life, okay?"

I laugh. She's the best. She really is. Her and Jack. I really lucked out in the in laws department.

They both took a seat around the table, next to Claire, who couldn't wait and was already digging into her mashed potatoes which made me happy because I'm the one who made them and it seems like she likes them... a lot.

Once everyone was settled, we all grabbed one another's hand and Julie led a prayer. It's my favorite part of dinner. Saying a prayer with my family.

"Okay, everyone, dig in," Monica claps her hands lightly together, "I hope the ribs are flavorful enough. I only had one bottle and didn't have time to run to the store and grab another one."

"I'm sure they are," Jack was already ready to bite into one.

"Yeah, Mon, they're always good," Julie agreed.

It was Sunday night in the Bolton household which meant family dinner. It was a tradition started the year Troy and I got engaged. We'd obviously all get together all the time and BBQ or hang out, but that was always randomly and didn't have a set schedule. This does. Sunday nights. Family night. We eat and talk. And laugh. Every Sunday night. Usually no one misses, but occasionally some people have to which is okay. And we all take turns hosting and cooking. Whoever hosts usually cooks the main meal and the rest bring a side dish or dessert. And today, we're hosting, but we didn't make the meal. Monica did. She insisted. She knew I had things to do so she took it upon herself to make it. I made the mashed potatoes and the corn. But she made the ribs and brought them over. Along with the artichokes. And they are so delicious. The ribs, not the artichokes. Still bleh.

It's one of my favorite things she makes and I am so glad she made them tonight.

"What are you guys whispering about?" My dad asks Jess and Claire who were only focused on each other.

"Nothing," they immediately say.

But I know exactly what they're talking about.

In about an hour, Claire's boyfriend of 4 years is going to come over and they're going to announce that they're engaged and Julie and Monica are going to cry, Maddie will be super excited and Jack will stand there, doing nothing because he knows since he asked for her hand in marriage. She told Troy and me the minute she got here, sliding her ring off and putting it in her pocket.

They laughed it off and continued eating and I just chuckled to myself since I knew what it's about.

"Bweaaad," Noah says, reaching for a Hawaiian roll in the middle of the table, "bwead, dadda. Dadda, bwead!"

"Last one, okay?" Troy grabs him one and puts it on his plate.

Noah frowns a bit, but it disappears the second he bites into the bread. That kid loves carbs. Just like his daddy, of course.

All of a sudden, Claire sets her fork down pretty loudly and looks around at everyone. "Oh my gosh, you guys! I forgot to tell you all about my interview on Friday! I'm pretty sure you're looking at the newest member of the E! News family. They loved me! And I'm not just guessing. She literally told me she loves me and she'll be in contact next week. And I've never been that person to assume, but I think it's safe to with this... I'm almost positive I got the job."

"What!?" Julia sets her fork down and grabs her arm, "why didn't you tell me sooner!? Congrats honey! That's so great. I'm SO proud!"

"Yeah, that's great! We're so happy for you!" is what pretty much everyone else said.

"Thank you, thank you," she clapped her hands together, "I'm so excited just thinking about it. Going to movie premiers, interviewing my favorite celebrities. It all sounds so fabulous, which I'm sure it's not, but it's my dream job."

And it's perfectly suited for her because she's kind, she's bubbly and she can keep a conversation going.

I'm so happy for her.

"Adding on to some good news..." Troy starts saying before he looks over at me, for permission I think so I nod my head even though he's already started telling them. It's not like he can just stop now. "We found out we're having a little girl."

Everyone immediately cheered and were extending their arms for us to grab. They were SO excited. Almost as excited as we were.

Monica laughed and shook her head a bit, "didn't I tell you? I told you! And you thought you were having another boy. That would have been great, two little boys, but oh my gosh, a little girl..."

"I know, we're so happy," I smile at Troy as he smiles back.

"Have you guys decided on a name?" Maddie asks, grabbing some more mashed potatoes from the center of the table.

I look over at Troy and it's to the point where we can communicate with our eyes to each other, which I love. So I know if we wanna tell them yet or not. And he doesn't care if we do, so I don't care, either. I know I'm in my second trimester, but I still get worried talking about it too much and then something this is my family. I want to share everything with them.

So, I do. "Sarah Elizabeth Bolton."

"Oh my gosh," Julie puts her hand over her heart," Sarah... I love that name. And Elizabeth, well, obviously. Both so beautiful."

"Yeah," my dad agrees, "she would have loved that."

I know she would have.

After a little more baby talk, everyone focused on eating and talking more about Claire and her soon to be new job. Jack started talking about golf with Troy while Julie and Jess had a conversation over them talking about school or something. There were so many conversations going on.

Maddie and Noah were busy laughing with each other, which was so cute to see.

And I sat here, just taking a look around at everyone. My family.

My dad, who is my rock. I've learned to appreciate him the most in life. He is why I am here today and I am so, so thankful for him. I know will always be there for me, one hundred percent. He has supported and loved me through everything I did and will continue to do so. He is my inspiration now and forever and I'm so blessed to have him as my dad. And my children are so lucky to have him as well.

Monica. My step mom. And friend. Who I really do love. I love her and her kind heart. And even though she's not my mom, she's the best alternative. She's always there for whatever I need and is always willing to help. I know we didn't start off on the right foot, but things are great. I'm so happy she's in my life.

Madeline. The sweetest sister. I don't like calling her my step sister because she feels like a real sister. I've known her since she was 5 years old and now she's a teenager now and is just... so cool. So bright. And so kindhearted. She never makes a fuss about anything and is seriously the one of the best girls I've ever known. I love her so much and I can't wait to see the woman she's going to become one day.

Jessica. My best friend. The best sister a girl could ask for. The one girl I know will always have my back, now and forever. She's the best aunt to Noah, the best sister to me and I can't thank God enough for placing her in my life. We're as close as sister's could be and I love her with my whole heart. I really could say so many great things, but the most important thing you should know is just that I love her so much and I'm so thankful she's my sister.

Claire. Another sister of mine. Sister in law. But I feel so close to her. Like with my own sister, I know she'll always have my back and she's always in mine and Troy's corner. She's the best aunt to Noah and I know she'll be the best aunt to Sarah. She's one of the funniest people I know and one of the few I know who can get me out of a terrible mood and I love her for that. I love how genuine she is and kind and thoughtful.

Jack. Another person I can call dad. He's so awesome. He's the best grandpa and father in law. He's welcomed me into his family with opened arms and wants nothing but the best for me and his son. I know he'll always be there for me just like my dad. Except he's funnier. Way funnier.

Julie. Julie. Julie. Oh man. I lost my mom, but I definitely gained one in her. And as far as mother in laws are concerned, I won the jackpot. Seriously. When Troy and I were in our first year of dating, she could not have been more supportive. She took the time to get to know me and didn't constantly have an eye on me like most mothers do for their sons, waiting for the girlfriend to mess up, watching my every move so I wouldn't hurt him. No. She was the sweetest, most supporting, loving person. And she still is. I know that if I'm having a horrible day, I can cry to her at 2 in the morning over the phone. Or show up at her house if I want her chocolate chip cookies and she'll be there to make them in a heartbeat. I love that she genuinely loves me because of me and not just because I'm Troy's wife. And it's always been that way. And it will always be that way. She's the best grandma and the best mom a girl could have.

And then there are my two boys, the ones I love more than anything in this world.

My sweet Noah, who I could not be more proud of. My first born. My baby. The one who taught me how to love someone unconditionally. He's the sweetest little boy and is so polite and happy and that's all I could ever ask for in a child. He listens, he wants to make us happy, he loves us just as much as we love him and that warms my heart completely. I could just melt into a puddle of tears thinking about how much I love him.

Troy.

Last, but not least, Troy. My husband. My best friend. My partner in crime. My soul mate.

If someone at the beginning of high school told me that I would meet my husband at the end of it, when I'd be just 18, I would not believe them. I would think it's crazy. How could you possibly find the person who you want to spend the rest of your life with at 18 years old? There are SO many people out there that you haven't yet met or gotten the opportunity to meet yet.

Yet, there I was, turning 19 years old, falling head over heels for him. And I haven't stopped since then. I'm still falling. And I'll continue to fall.

I knew I didn't have to meet other guys in college. I knew that I wasn't missing out on anything. Troy was the one for me and he always will be the one.

He's the one who will drive around with me while we listen to our favorite songs and rock out in the car. Who will get a double scoop of red velvet ice cream with me and take a walk around Beverly Hills. Who will hold my hair up while I vomit from morning sickness. Who will stay up with me all night if I can't sleep to talk to me, to watch a movie with me. Who comes home every day to me after work and tells me he missed me. Who looks into my eyes like I'm the only woman in the world. Who will make me breakfast. Who will give me a foot rub if he thinks I need one. Who's there to tell me when I'm being an idiot or when he's so unbelievably proud of me. Who's always letting me know how much he loves me. And showing it to me.

Who promised to love me forever and is doing exactly that.

He is my rock. He is my everything. And I'm so blessed that he's my husband and I get to be a parent right alongside him.

"Hey, you okay?"

"What?" I look up at Troy, who has a worried look on his face, "yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure?" He asks, as everyone's still in their own little conversations, "you were spacing out."

I'm more than fine. I have a healthy baby boy, a healthy baby girl on the way, a husband who I love more than anything, and family members who are the best people. Life couldn't be better. Honestly. I'm living the best life and I thank God everyday that this is the way I'm living it. And for the people in it.

"Everything's great," I turn to him, grabbing his hand, "I love you."

"And I love you," he smiles at me.

Like, I told my mom earlier... sometimes there is good in goodbye and all the people sitting at the table that weren't in my life 8 years ago are proof of that.

Everything is absolutely, one hundred percent great.


End file.
